Why do i feel this way?

[goingcrazy]

I don't understand my thoughts. Everyday thoughts of death consume my mind. And i so badly want to die, and be away from this world. But i don't have a bad a life, i have a wonderful family, lovely friends, and i get relatively good grades at school. So why is it that these feelings of death are so strong. It's like every second when I am left alone it is all that i can think about. I dread going back to school, having to pretend I'm happy, and putting up with people judging me. The truth is, i don't even know if they're judging me, i am just so paranoid. And just sitting here typing this is freaking me out and i am so confused this probably doesn't even make sense. I just need to know why i am thinking these things. Is this depression? Because sometimes i feel happy when i am distracted, it is just when i am alone i feel so lost and like i want to die. Someone please, i just really want answers.

 

[dean01]

my depression causes me to have thoughts about death and self harm, unfortunatley im not a doctor so i cant say it is depression, the best thing to do is to go see a doctor and explain to them about your thoughts. its ok to talk about them especially with a doctor as they will find you the correct help.
hope all goes well.

 

[AdamE]

It sounds like it's probably depression. I think it's pretty standard to feel like you have no reason to be depressed. It might feel a bit better if you try to remember that being depressed is a sickness, not something you can really control without help.

I'd recommend you to seek help. Depression is a horrible sickness, and you should not have to feel like this. If possible, try to get a friend to come with you. Going alone can sometimes feel pretty scary.