Who else cringes at thought of being ALONE in public?

[ThatLonelyKid]

I cant stand to be alone in public. I feel so vulnerable, especially when there's a group of people comming towords me or me towards them and theres no way of avoiding them seeing me alone. Because then what ever one person is thinking about me, he could easily tell his companions and they could all be talking trash about me. Any group of people capable of exchanging there awful thoughts about me to eachother scares me to death. I mean one person cant really tell anybody his stupid thoughts if he's by himself. lol......or HERSELF ofcourse. I try to avoid groups of people as much as possible at school or anywhere when I'm alone because of the horrible feeling I get.

 

[sidney]

then just keep inviting a friend or family member to go out with you. or try observing people who are also alone in public, theres more than u think, watch them subtly, and see how content they are
instead of thinking "they're saying bad things about me" think good toughts like betcha they're saying look at their top isnt it cool? or i like their haircut, fight bad thots with good ones

 

[Atlantis]

Sometimes when I am alone I keep analyzing groups of people, or if there is other people alone like if I wanted to know if it is too strange for me to be alone, or if I should to be in a group too. But anyways that is not a big problem to me, in college I was usually alone. It doesn't affect me much, sometimes I even prefer to be alone, and not in a group.

 

[October]

I feel the same way, I get extremely panicked when confronted with groups of people, teenagers or men in particular. I have to distance myself as much as possible, I feel as though these are the people who will be cruel to me. I have real trust issues with teens and men who are likely to be sizing me up sexually (I'm a 19 y/o female). Not entirely rational I know, but it's how it is.

I've had a few positive experiences lately that should work toward taking the edge off that, though. Had a pair of 22 y/o male electricians come to work on the house here, and as they left I was expecting them to say something nasty amongst themselves. Instead I heard them discussing how nice my father and house were. (!)

My friend I were searching for her lost cat last week, and she stopped to ask some teenage girls if they'd seen anything. They passed the house again on their way back from wherever they went, and I was surprised to hear them talking about possible places the cat might have gone. They couldn't see us sitting under the tree, so that was nice. Looked like typically nasty girls!

And when we finally discovered where the cat was, it turned out she had been rescued by a young man who had been working really hard to bring her back to health and find the owner.

Goes to show how our minds work against us, but isn't it cruel how one slight reenforcement of our negative perceptions of things no matter how trivial can go toward trashing weeks worth of positive behaviour?

 

[recluse]

I'm not scared of being on my own, just embarassed at being seen as a loner. I've been to the cinema on my own a few times and the last time i saw someone who used to work with me, with his girlfriend there and i felt ashamed because everyone else there were with someone.

 

[4seasons]

You think to much, stop observing everyone when you go out. Stay in your own head.

 

[Primrose]

I don't mind being out on my own too much, I lived in London for years and got used to it - I always pretended I was on the phone or listening to music and avoided eye contact.

But the one thing I hate more than anything is being left on my own in a club. It's horrible - I wish I had more faith in myself as a person and could chat away to new people.

But, don't you just hate so called friends who run off and leave you on your own? I know it's not their job to keep me company, and I'm a big girl I should be able to do my own thing... but, it's when you are out with two other friends and they tell you they'll 'be back in a minute', but leave you sitting like a big lemon for ages.

 

[shon]

I'm not scared of being on my own, just embarassed at being seen as a loner. I've been to the cinema on my own a few times and the last time i saw someone who used to work with me, with his girlfriend there and i felt ashamed because everyone else there were with someone.

When I was 15, I went to a high school football game. I was standing by myself watching the game and a boy walked up to me and said "It must really suck not having any friends!" It was in a way that I knew he was making fun of me. I don't know why people think that when you're quiet you either don't have feelings or they just don't care. I never went to another game again.

 

[Richey]

It doesn't bother me going out alone, about once every week i'll eat at a cafe alone and the trick is to have some reading material like a newspaper of magazine so you look busy, then your not stuck gazing across the room at everyone else ....

pretending your texting someone is a habit of mine too, or just looking preoccupied.

even shopping you can just go to the specific places you like if you go alone, i also often practice basketball at the local courts alone and people will often walk by in groups, i think to myself "Well at least i'm out here getting exercise and improving a skill" .....

but i used to hate going places alone like you. now i don't care what people think, because nobody is actually thinking "Oh my that person is alone what are they thinking" ..mainly because its expected that people arn't always going to be in groups.