where you born with SA/Shyness

[prince1]

My SA started to kick in about 4 years ago at the age of 12, before then i was extremely confident, and i mean it. I was always leed roles in my school plays, even doing silly things in them like stupid voices and notgetting the slightest bit embarrised, talk to any girls confidentaly. Acctuarlly i cant think about ever feeling anxious about socialising back then. But now obcourse i am scared to even enter a classroom because of the fear of embarrisment, so im just curious who wasent born with it and who was.

Oh and p.s what can i do to get rid of the SA im currently on meds but dont want to be plus they suck.

 

[mienaino]

One can be born with a melancholic temperament, or predisposed to anxiety disorders, but one is never born with an anxiety disorder. It isn't even possible to experience specific anxiety until one is self-aware.

But I come as close as one can to being "born with SA," if that answers your question.

 

[charlieHungerford]

I too believe it isn't possible as such to be born with SA, however I do believe if someone was born and were unloved and experienced cruelty and abuse for example from the word go, then I can definitely see how a person would become afraid of people and didn't trust people, from as early as they can remember, etc. I mean if you cannot trust your own family to be nice and are going to hurt you, then how can you trust anyone else to be nice towards you and not hurt you? But obviously I am no expert so if this is wrong and babies are born anxious of people then I won't doubt it.

I am a believer that the anxiety we suffer around people is there to protect us from being hurt, and you have learnt that you are in danger of getting hurt in the social situations you are anxious in. You can only believe you are going to be hurt if you have been hurt in similar situation.

For myself I was so confident, so loud, no SA whatsoever until I suffered years of ridicule, put downs, name calling in my teenage years. I am 100% convinced that I will overcome my SA, I have made huge progress in recent years and feel I am getting ever closer to becoming my old self again.

 

[rado31]

Hi Charlie

Can u tell me about method you are usingg for recovery , i m pretty confused

 

[ZappBrannigan]

I don't believe in it being something you can be born with either.

I was too the leader type when I was smaller, never afraid of any social situation and always playing with everyone.

Years of bullying and ridicule and then years of solitude and deep self-resentment is what caused my SP. I am 100% certain my genes didn't have anything to do with it.

 

[Starry]

I don't think you can be born with SA/SP, but you can definitiely be born with a predisposition to shyness... Which I was. I have no idea what it's like to be outgoing at all. My shyness just became aggrivated through bullying and low self-esteem.

 

[xkiss_me_nowx]

i use to be realllyyy loud. but it changed when i got to 13..14 maybe. im still loud around my friends, but when im on my own, i become this other person. i hatee it

 

[Amiyumi]

I too believe it isn't possible as such to be born with SA, however I do believe if someone was born and were unloved and experienced cruelty and abuse for example from the word go, then I can definitely see how a person would become afraid of people and didn't trust people, from as early as they can remember, etc. I mean if you cannot trust your own family to be nice and are going to hurt you, then how can you trust anyone else to be nice towards you and not hurt you? But obviously I am no expert so if this is wrong and babies are born anxious of people then I won't doubt it.

I am a believer that the anxiety we suffer around people is there to protect us from being hurt, and you have learnt that you are in danger of getting hurt in the social situations you are anxious in. You can only believe you are going to be hurt if you have been hurt in similar situation.

For myself I was so confident, so loud, no SA whatsoever until I suffered years of ridicule, put downs, name calling in my teenage years. I am 100% convinced that I will overcome my SA, I have made huge progress in recent years and feel I am getting ever closer to becoming my old self again.

Yes, I've always been like this.

I don't think you mean people are born with sa, but I know what your getting at.

In a book I read: The anxitey and phobia workbook, it had a section explaining the things that'll contribute to someone developing sp, and the triats certian experiences will give us. One of the things that applied to me was emotional abuse, where I was never cuddled, encouraged or talked to. Everything you experience will determine how you cope. It went on to explain how each type of experience will develop your personality, and all my experiences seemed to match how I've turned out perfectly.

Also I read somewhere that these 'triats', anything that happens to you before the age of 3, will become strongly intergrated as part of your personallity, and will feel normal to you. I think your brain develops fastest as a baby, obviously, but it dosen't stop untill you're about 23-25 (I think?), I think thats why people don't usually develop sa after their teens. Actually that one was from a libray book I got, I'll get it out again to explain better, I have some questions about it too.

Sorry I can't give much information on overcomming it though, I've never been on meds either. Hope u get help here, I've been learning so much about myself here, it's helped alot, even though I'm going through a weird phase. And sorry if I didn't make much sense, it's been ages since I've read much on this stuff... :?