tooshytosay
Well-known member
So I'm a very shy guy, who's never had a girlfriend... and you see all those "couples" out there and of course the question that pops into my mind is.. how on earth did they meet in the first place?
I mean all those couples must have met SOMEWHERE, right? So, in terms of %s... where would that have been?
- Bars? Clubs? - I've actually never been to one, but do they really give rise to "real relationships"?
- Work? School / University? - Well OK... but to me there always seems to be this strong vibe of "professional boundaries" or "collegial boundaries" where people try to "leave work at work" and leave personal stuff out of it... or are they just doing that because I'm not considered "suitable material" in the first place?
- Interest Groups / Sports / Cultural Clubs - I've had my share of these, but TBH you just end up going there to do the activity. I mean yeah I've heard all the stuff about "you get to meet new people" - yes you do, but... for me it hasn't worked out to friendships, let alone a girlfriend :
:
- Complete stranger in a completely unexpected situation - I find this is the stuff of fairy tales and movies, whilst it is theoretically possible I believe it is quite unlikely in reality. I once believed in this fairy tale and tried to see every chance encounter with a stranger "for more than it was worth".. it only left me utterly disappointed.
- "Travel" - I don't really get this one. I mean, wherever you go in the world, people are people. Can you really meet a girl playing tourist?
- Dating Agencies - I don't know. Does this stuff really work? I can't think of many couples that met through this; sure if you get desperate enough I guess you could try it... but I don't think I am quite there yet.
- Online - Apart from the fact that 80% of the internet appears to be male. I'm just suspicious because it's really easy to present a "persona" online revealing only a facet of yourself... I feel you can't really tell the person until you've met the living breathing being.
- Friends of Friends / Friends of Relatives / Relatives of Friends / Friends of Friends of Friends - My money is actually on this one - many couples that last appear to have met "through their existing social network". I mean, this is what stuff like Facebook is all about. Friends beget friends - and some of these "friends" may end up being your girlfriend. But it really screws up someone like me who have very few friends and lost touch with most relatives.
I mean all those couples must have met SOMEWHERE, right? So, in terms of %s... where would that have been?
- Bars? Clubs? - I've actually never been to one, but do they really give rise to "real relationships"?
- Work? School / University? - Well OK... but to me there always seems to be this strong vibe of "professional boundaries" or "collegial boundaries" where people try to "leave work at work" and leave personal stuff out of it... or are they just doing that because I'm not considered "suitable material" in the first place?
- Interest Groups / Sports / Cultural Clubs - I've had my share of these, but TBH you just end up going there to do the activity. I mean yeah I've heard all the stuff about "you get to meet new people" - yes you do, but... for me it hasn't worked out to friendships, let alone a girlfriend :
:- Complete stranger in a completely unexpected situation - I find this is the stuff of fairy tales and movies, whilst it is theoretically possible I believe it is quite unlikely in reality. I once believed in this fairy tale and tried to see every chance encounter with a stranger "for more than it was worth".. it only left me utterly disappointed.
- "Travel" - I don't really get this one. I mean, wherever you go in the world, people are people. Can you really meet a girl playing tourist?
- Dating Agencies - I don't know. Does this stuff really work? I can't think of many couples that met through this; sure if you get desperate enough I guess you could try it... but I don't think I am quite there yet.
- Online - Apart from the fact that 80% of the internet appears to be male. I'm just suspicious because it's really easy to present a "persona" online revealing only a facet of yourself... I feel you can't really tell the person until you've met the living breathing being.
- Friends of Friends / Friends of Relatives / Relatives of Friends / Friends of Friends of Friends - My money is actually on this one - many couples that last appear to have met "through their existing social network". I mean, this is what stuff like Facebook is all about. Friends beget friends - and some of these "friends" may end up being your girlfriend. But it really screws up someone like me who have very few friends and lost touch with most relatives.
