Where are you even supposed to meet girls?

[jordo]

i'm afraid of online dating because i feel that when you actually meet it iwll be even more nerve wrecking than just meeting before you know eachother.

true. but isnt it worth trying rather than being alone? i know its easier said than done. if you do...keep trying...you may have to go through a few girls to find the right one.

to me it'd seem easier online dating. I mean you don't have to talk to them just type. they cant tell you're nervous because they can't see you, and you can text for months or w.e until you feel comfortable meeting. Seems like a win win.

hmm sounds like what i do on meetup.com and used to on myspace without much success lol. what site do you use? are they free? i dont want to pay cuz i know the chances of me actually hitting it off with someone is remote. lol

 

[jordo]

*hides*

lol why? you dont want any of us shy guys? or are you being shy?

 

[Ventrilotwo]

I'm in ottawa tutux. I'm just really not interested in meeting friends, i have friends that i am pleased with and i don't see the need for more.

 

[AvrX]

I have no idea. Work would make sense but it depends on the job too.
Online dating seems quite scary to me although I haven't tried it.

 

[ShiJai]

[Well girls have it easier when it comes to getting attention from guys. If you can make yourselves at least somewhat attractive, guys will notice. You don't have to be a super model or anything, just be healthy looking. A man attracting a female is more difficult. Every women has a different list of standards men must meet. It sucks because when we just "be ourselves" and it doesn't work we are screwed. I think that's why you see more guys making these types of threads than girls.

Sorry, but that's ridiculous. As they say the grass is always greener etc.
I have a lot of difficulty approaching guys, and they aren't comfy approaching me. I'm told that I present an unattainable and intimidating image... Mostly I'm just holding back, otherwise I have no idea what I'm doing wrong.

If you pigeon hole, or sterotype, you automaticaly hinder yourself by creating self fullfilling phrophecies. By expecting all girls to fit some sort of generalisation, you're rationalising excuses to never try, and end up failing before you begin.

At least be honest with yourself, it's the only way we have any chance of overcoming the hurdles we place in front of ourselves.

 

[freestylemonster]

I was talkin to this guy in my communication class, he asked me why I'm always so quiet, I said it's because I'm scared to talk for some reason. He said he was the exact same way in high school and he thought that he could rely on good looks alone to attract girls. The thing is that does attract them to you at first sometimes, but if you want them to stay interested in you, you have to also let your personality shine. I read somewhere that girls don't put as much importance on looks as guys do. So personality es mucho importante! Now we just gotta stop being so scared...

 

[pinkputter]

OK the original thread was where to meet girls...

AS A GIRL I would say...

at school or work, at church, at clubs/bars (a friend of mine just married a guy she met at a bar, they are both christian), ANY PUBLIC PLACE, i.e. but not inclusive of, book stores, shopping, restaurants, concerts, another persons house, heck on the street....

basically SAers in general should get out more, so the more you do, the more oppurtunity you have to meet people.


AS FAR AS LOOKS and attractiveness goes...

i CANT like a guy- no matter how hot, sexy, drop dead gorgeous- if i dont like his personality. This is me though. I know a lot of shallow girls who would marry on looks/money alone. But chances are you dont want to be with them either. Like yall already said, looks attract you. I notice guys who i am physically attracted to, but the second they open their mouth, i can tell you if i still think they are as cute as when i first saw them...a lot times, they are cuter...

 

[no1]

I dont know how to talk to just anyone on the street. Most girls expect this is the waydating should be. Animals appear to do this, but the little time they have with each other before mating is considered the "getting to know each other time". I couldn't *sigh*. it's about haqving things in common, or getting to know the person. Find something in common with people, and then you can meet people wherever you go. And learn how to make conversation.

 

[Havocan]

There were some good points in pinkputter's post. Personality is in the end what matters for a relationship to last. That applies for males too, even though many girls might not want to believe that. Looks get you far but not to the end destination. In general, I find most girls cute in a way, if they've also got brains they're definitely worth picking up {too bad I've got SA and am incapable of doing that. Oh well^^}.

Girls exist, believe or not, practically everywhere. Outside school, if one chooses to ignore clubs and bars, they're to be found in courses, classes, libraries and anywhere else. I think a good start for a person with SA who wants to meet an interesting girl would be to start joining a course and then try to get to know the others, unless it's a VERY SPECIAL course one's almost guaranteed to meet some girls there.

 

[no1]

heh, that reminds me. I just started going to school in the downtown area, and I have to take the train and sometimes the buses too. It's a different experience because now I feel like I can sort of blend in with all the people because they are everywhere. Maybe I feel different but still.. with so many people around, I just feel good sorta... taking in the presences of many human beings, which I need like I need to eat to survive or nourish myself.

 

[Walk]

By far the most common place to meet chicks is in your job. Followed by school. Followed by bars, clubs.

Online dating is something I've thought about but haven't done yet.

Basically, if you hang out with girls frequently, you will get to know each other and be comfortable with each other, which can lead to intimacy many times. I've always blown my opportunities with chick co workers, and even certain customers at former jobs I had.

 

[Walk]

Speaking of online dating, I remember a site being thrown around here for people with social phobia. I couldn't find it again. Anyone know of a few good online dating sites for people suffering from anxiety?

Thanks in advance...

 

[ventriloone]

courses, classes,

Not mine.

 

[faithnomore]

I'd like to know where to find "normal" girls. (girls that have nice personalities, and dont live just to be popular and club 24/7)

Where are the normal girls/where do they go!?

 

[no1]

I dont know well... I dont want to go to a club by myself or a party. I've never been to one anyway. Maybe that's where you can learn to talk about things other than school or work or business....

 

[faithnomore]

I dont know well... I dont want to go to a club by myself or a party. I've never been to one anyway. Maybe that's where you can learn to talk about things other than school or work or business....

The thought of being at a club or party scares the sh*t out of me. I've been invited to places like that before, but i would never want to go.

I'm just a nice guy that wants a nice girl. But i cant seem to find any girls.

 

[recluse]

I'd like to know where to find "normal" girls. (girls that have nice personalities, and dont live just to be popular and club 24/7)

Where are the normal girls/where do they go!?

In a convent :lol: Nuns probably have more fun than i do though lol :lol:

 

[faithnomore]

I found this. It makes sense: http://www.datingclass.com/seduction/socially-isolated-meet-woman.shtml

The problem is, i had alot of opportunities to do social things with other people my age a few years ago. But now, unless i join a club (a class or hobby related) or something, i wont get anyone to go anywhere with.

Its all damn nerve wrecking! (i dont really wanna go anywhere, but it seems i'll have to, to get a woman)

 

[no1]

meh, I dont know if I have too much in common with anyone and I don't get too many invitations if any at all. Except from maybe club promoters. So I'm the one who has to invite myself then I guess and that all seems too desperate, I guess.

I wouldn't go to a club by myself I would think either. I might end up talking to some dude.. or nobody at all. asking some girl who would reject me. or have all the good girls taken. I may even end up not liking anyone or sharing any interests.