When the weakest of the survival chain kicks you

[Klaus]

I have one cousin that is a little bit shy (but no social phobia), had problems with bullying at school, when one girlfriend left him he stopped eating and got depressed. He definitely can't argue with no one, he accepts everything that people ask them to do. If someone fights with him, he keeps calling for the person to solve problems because he can't stand losing a friend etc. His mother, my aunt, has always talked his stories to everyone, so everybody in the family know that he is a little bit "fragile".
And people sometimes scream with him etc, and he always stays quiet, never argue or fight back.

I think I'm really polite when talking to people in general.
When I meet him at Christmas or at my mother's house, he is ALWAYS very bitter with me.

It's like:
Me: People are feeding this dog with the wrong kind of food. This kind of food is for another breed of dog.
Cousin: Ohhhh! So you are a veterinary now! Please, check if the dog's health is ok too.
Me: ...

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Me: This band used to be so good, but now their new songs are not so good. Maybe that's why they are doing few shows nowadays.
Cousin: You are talking a lot of ****, please stop talking.
Me: ...

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What annoys me is that he doesn't talk like that with no one! It's quite the opposite! Actually, People talk like that with him.

I know people can read you corporal language or your tone of voice and see that you scared as hell, but I try my best to hide this things, I can't identify how the son of a bit.ch detects that I'm weaker than him (for now).

 

[Feathers]

Hmm, maybe he just has a problem with people expressing negativity? My Dad is like that, he can't stand it if I criticise someone else in his presence, even if it's someone completely unrelated...
The good point about this is that he doesn't let my friends criticise me either

So how about just not expressing negativity in this guy's presence? If you don't have something positive or neutral to say, just don't say anything? Or talk to someone else, who's in charge of that dog for example?

Maybe he talks negatively in his head all the time, or other people talk to him like that, and he's just overwhelmed with that and can't listen to any more negativity? (And maybe that was his favorite band??) People can feel 'attacked' or 'guilty' for all sorts of different things.. (and they may not alway be logical..)
If he wants to 'solve problems' all the time, it is very difficult to think about things that he may not feel he can do anything about right at that time...?
Maybe he just wanted some peace, with someone who is nice and caring...?

How old is your cousin and how old are you? Maybe he's older and feels 'entitled' to be 'higher up' in status? If you are older, maybe you can teasingly remind him he better 'show some respect to his elders' or such?

If you're actually a caring and friendly person maybe he just feels at ease to 'be himself' - it seems he can rarely be that with other people?
If you are always polite, he may think he can 'afford' doing that too? Maybe just go away and hang out with someone else, or stop being so polite, hmm?
On the other hand, he may really need an ally... Can't be easy being him...

So, hope you manage to work something out... And hope he gets some help/therapy or such...? (for eating problems/disorder and depression..? Or that his mom does...? OoO)