What causes extreme sensitivity?

[BlueOysterCultFan96]

Hello. The question I am asking is what causes somebody to be so sensitive to things people say/do?? There's a couple of examples I have about myself that I think show more sensitivity than most people:

When I worked at a grocery store for a few months not too long ago, I would always get annoyed when a customer ignored me when I said 'have a nice day.' I would remember regular customers who ignored me and I would make sure to bag their stuff and not say anything to them, I would act like they don't exist and I hope they noticed that I didn't acknowledge them.

A few weeks ago I started texting an acquaintance who I am somewhat friends with and we talked casually but I mentioned that I felt depressed, and they didn't respond after that. Now 2 days ago they sent me a text saying 'what's up.' I just haven't even responded yet because they ignored me last time.

There was also this kid in 8th grade who I didn't know that said I was stupid when I was infront of the class because I didn't know an answer to this question; I ignored the remark. In 10th grade when I was walking to lunch, this same kid for some reason said hi to me with my name to go with it. I just gave him an angry stare as I walked along. At a later time I felt kind of bad, but I also felt like they deserved it....they were one of those snobby socialite people anyway. I remember anyone who makes me mad and I will respond to them by keeping a frozen face and not speaking, or speaking with as few words as I can in a negative voice.

So what causes a person to be so sensitive to things?? Who else on here is sensitive like that??

 

[-lonestar-]

I believe I have this issue too, its important to realize people are just stupid. Most of them talk without thinking. Never take coments to heart.

I think we are just more emotional than the average person, and its good to just not dwell on negative coments and try your best to keep a distance from people that talk crap.

I like it when cashiers say have a nice day, and I think most people either don't notice cuz they are too busy in their thoughts or they figure its just you doing your job, and basically have nothing to say. I'm guilty of that too, but I try to respond with a "you too" most people just don't think they need to respond and don't think its something hurtful as I bet many others do it too its not a direct act of ignoring you just them going on in their way.

I was once diagnosed with being a sensitive person, and some book title was mentioned but I wasn't really listening, and my social phobia made it difficult to ask. Also I was crying as the Dr. spoke of my issues, so yeah I guess try and find info you can read about dealing with being overly sensitive. I don't view it as a negative, but its also not ok to be hurting over things most people don't notice.

 

[kilojoule]

Its ok to be sensitive. Holding onto a grudge is like slow release poison. It will slowly destroy you and do nothing to the other person.

 

[vj288]

I can be pretty sensitive about things as well, I got a paper back a week and a half ago and still haven't looked at because I saw all the red marks on it and I get the worst feeling when I read negative criticism. Extreme sensitivity can be brought on by many things I believe, may just be genetic. Living a sheltered life can also leave someone extremely sensitive too.

 

[Feathers]

There is a book Highly Sensitive Person, and a few websites and forums too... Also Wikipedia entry etc.

There seem to be different theories, some say it can be partly genetic, partly environmental, which makes the most sense to me. Often relatives may be sensitive too, you can maybe look in your family?

Negative self image or going through rough times/stress/overwhelm or such can cause people to be more sensitive too...

 

[Invisibleman]

Same im so damn sensitive, im so afraid of anysort of criticism. I even take constructive criticism to heart like its an insult. The cashier thing irks the hell out of me, or any other time I say thanks to somebody and they dont acknowledge.

Like a week ago I went into the classroom to ask my teacher something,usually somebody says hey Mr._____ and hes like yessss so happy and animated. I walked in and asked something and hes like "what" without even looking up and I asked him something and he explained it and I said thanks all happy and hes just like "yup mmmm hmmm" again without looking up. Like its so lame that I took that to heart but I did now I cant help but think he hates me.

 

[Fighter86]

The last scenerio I can't offer any advise, but for the 1st two, I have some explaination.


The bit about cashiering, it happens all the time. It's not unusual for people to just ignore service staff's wishes.


However the second one, about your friends replying 2 days later, I don't think they are much of a friend. I have been on the receiving end of such friendships and I would say your friends are not taking the friendship seriously.

 

[Littlewilly]

Yeh! I have this aswell I think mine probably started to get worse as I got older "sucks" & how valued you feel when you get praised for something whatever it might be especially if i've spoken to a stranger in a shop or outside somewhere & you've been part of a conversation it can really up your confidence & self-esteem but its when your not in a situation like that & you feel or I do anyway at times that your being shut out you can become frustrated & angry.::

 

[antihistamine]

I don't know what causes extreme sensitivity but I know I have it. I can be particularly vulnerable sometimes if I feel down about myself already. Sometimes it can be just a physical thing-like flu like symptoms-then someone says something and it just finishes me off.
I have a habit of joking with people to cover my nervousness, but the truth is I can't really take disrespectful jibes back. I hate being teased.
I know I'm an idiot. I don't need other people to remind me of it.

 

[TheRadicalAnxiousLefty]

I can be pretty sensitive about things as well, I got a paper back a week and a half ago and still haven't looked at because I saw all the red marks on it and I get the worst feeling when I read negative criticism. Extreme sensitivity can be brought on by many things I believe, may just be genetic. Living a sheltered life can also leave someone extremely sensitive too.

Ditto. That's why I dropped out of uni. I was the most tense-afraid procrastinator of all time. Most social phobics do really well academically because in their spare time they are in the library. Not me. I only stayed at uni if I had to; otherwise I got out of there and got home. Any form of work I avoided, because I was scared that if I opened the book and started studying, I would not understand it. Then I would start thinking I was too stupid for university. Never would I even consider emailing a professor, asking for help. Why? Because I thought that if I asked for help, I was too stupid to be at university. I never joined any study groups, hung out with anyone at uni, or even talked to anyone at all. I basically just had as little to do with it as possible, while somehow convincing myself that things would all work out. The irrationality of the human brain, I ****ing swear.....

 

[BlueOysterCultFan96]

Thank you very much all who have commented. I appreciate the feedback and hope all of you have a Happy Halloween