What can I do?

aj

Well-known member
Sorry if this should really go in the love and relationships section.

In case you didn't see the other thread, a girl who I worked with and I like a lot has left. I've never been out with her socially. We talk a bit over the internet. She has a boyfriend though.

So is there any way I can instead just spend more time with her, be around her, anything? What can I do? Ask if I can join her and her mates when they go out or something? What do people do?

Otherwise Friday 29th (her leaving do) is quite possibly the last time I'll ever see her. It's the same thing it has always been with every single person I've met... I like them, they seem to like me, but never, ever see each other outside of work/whatever. Then it ends and I never see them again. Every single person. Here we go again.

The difference is that I spent a year working with her, and I'm missing her a lot already.
 

hbanana11

Well-known member
aj said:
Sorry if this should really go in the love and relationships section.

In case you didn't see the other thread, a girl who I worked with and I like a lot has left. I've never been out with her socially. We talk a bit over the internet. She has a boyfriend though.

So is there any way I can instead just spend more time with her, be around her, anything? What can I do? Ask if I can join her and her mates when they go out or something? What do people do?

Otherwise Friday 29th (her leaving do) is quite possibly the last time I'll ever see her. It's the same thing it has always been with every single person I've met... I like them, they seem to like me, but never, ever see each other outside of work/whatever. Then it ends and I never see them again. Every single person. Here we go again.

The difference is that I spent a year working with her, and I'm missing her a lot already.

What are your intentions exactly? Do you wish to be involved with her romantically or just as friends? ...If your intentions are of a romantic nature, i would suggest staying out of it because she has a boyfriend. If you are just friends, then i dont see why you shouldnt go meet her in person.
 

aj

Well-known member
Put it this way, if she wanted me then my arms would be wide open, but if she doesn't then I just want to be friends. Anything is better than nothing.

You say meet her in person, but wouldn't anything pretty much be a date (at least to her boyfriend!) if there aren't any more of her friends about?
 

hbanana11

Well-known member
aj said:
Put it this way, if she wanted me then my arms would be wide open, but if she doesn't then I just want to be friends. Anything is better than nothing.

You say meet her in person, but wouldn't anything pretty much be a date (at least to her boyfriend!) if there aren't any more of her friends about?

Ok i see...i suppose it would appear to be a date if you two were alone...how big is her boyfriend? Maybe you could take him :D Just kidding.

I think its all up to you...if you want to see her that bad then just realize the possibilities. Her boyfriend could get really mad, she could like you more, if you get lucky maybe she will dump him, or you could continue your friendship, etc. Maybe it would be worth it. If i were you, i would feel good for just having the courage to see her, even if things did not go well.

Good Luck :wink:
 

chris87

Well-known member
I actually have a little bit of experience with this issue. Don't ask haha! I met a girl in high school, and I was graduating. She was a year younger. I really liked her, so I started talking to her online. It was scary to me at first, but now we talk a lot. She has a boyfriend, but we still do things together. In fact, she's had a few boyfriends since we've started talking. She was the one who initially suggested to me that we should go eat. I, of course, was so nervous about it, but I finally got the courage. I don't believe that she tells her boyfriend she is out with me. I just have a feeling, even though I'm not sure why. Her new boyfriend goes to the same college that she goes to, which could make it a little interesting this year. Not to mention the fact that I like her, even though I could never say anything.

Anyway, I would just ask her if she'd like to do something sometime. I know, easier said than done. Maybe you could talk to her online? She might just suggest that you get together. It's so much nicer talking face-to-face...it doesn't require so much typing!
 

aj

Well-known member
Thanks guys. I don't want to make someone get dumped... I wouldn't want it to happen to me... I'll see what happens. God I miss her.
 
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