Trouble making an effort with me.

[sahxox]

I've learnt many strategies to help with my SP over the years but have trouble making myself make an effort to do such things. It's like I ditch myself and go on autopilot, resolved to a state as the 'lone wolf' who just goes with it. If people initiate effort with me, I usually pay it back and am friendly and extend conversation. But half the time this voice in my head is like 'boring' or 'why did they just tell me that?'
It sounds terrible but I cbf'd always being nice to people. I think 'what is the point?' and it takes so much energy. A few times I've mustered up the strength to be sociable and once there, it's so easy. Even now I get this dreaded feeling that 'what is the point, I'll just end up miserable again.'
It extends to all components of my life. What to do for a career - who cares, it takes too much effort. I've resigned to unhappiness. Atm, my life is good, but I still feel it's easy just to survive, opposed to truly being happy and living.
:/

 

[MikeyC]

It sounds like you have a strong case of apathy towards everything.

Are you stuck in a rut? What is it that you truly want to do? Change jobs? Make a friend? Go on holiday? Eat peanut butter flavoured ice cream with beetroot? Make it happen! No matter what it takes, work towards it. Having goals is a great way to keep moving.

 

[hoddesdon]

Yes, it is easy either to feel that you do not feel like bothering, or to forget. Consistency is vital.

 

[Subpop]

Yes, it is easy either to feel that you do not feel like bothering, or to forget. Consistency is vital.

That resonates with me too sahxox and hoddesdon. I need to maintain enough 'enthusiasm' or momentum to maintain that consistency or else I become apathetic and become the 'lone wolf' again.

Mikeyc, I agree with the goal setting idea....I look at people around me and I have realised that they are always setting goals. Some of the goals are quite complex and are broken down into many smaller goals. The 'consistency factor' is important because the overall goal can often be only achieved by meeting many of the smaller goals....and all of the smaller goals have to be met...and this can take time and a consistent approach.

 

[sahxox]

That resonates with me too sahxox and hoddesdon. I need to maintain enough 'enthusiasm' or momentum to maintain that consistency or else I become apathetic and become the 'lone wolf' again.

Mikeyc, I agree with the goal setting idea....I look at people around me and I have realised that they are always setting goals. Some of the goals are quite complex and are broken down into many smaller goals. The 'consistency factor' is important because the overall goal can often be only achieved by meeting many of the smaller goals....and all of the smaller goals have to be met...and this can take time and a consistent approach.

Yeah it's a momentum thing! Right now I feel completely depressed, after realising that actually I have been depressed for as long as I can remember. A very strong dark force... goal setting and then embracing these small victories is how you defeat it... thanks for the advice everyone.

"Peanut butter icecream with beetroot" haha