the difference between the a-hole and the "nice guy"...

[Perfidion]

You need to think less about sex. Leading clinical trials have shown that people who think about sex all the time don't actually get to have any.

 

[Sure_whynot]

Of course I do!

My idea of "appropriate" is simply, doing things the right way, the way they are supposed to. Doesn't necessarily mean forcing my will upon her, but it also means tactfulness. If she rejects then so be it, at least I still have dignity. Everyone is their own. To each his/her own. If she doesn't accept then fine, another one might, maybe there wasn't a certain chemistry going on.

Other people might have different opinions on what is considered "dignified". So be it I guess.

Hows doing things "the right way" been treating you?
If the "right way" doesn't work, I'd have to logically state that its probably the wrong way.

says who?

honesty is more attractive when it really is.

I dont know if I'm being an asshole. I might appear to be. I might be a ****in horndog, do you think that's going to get me anywhere soon with women if I am overly redundant about it by expressing it inappropriately, or the fact that I may even be perverted so I shouldn't even express it at all or if not, be careful about it? Sexuality is a touchy subject.

I'm sure people also may have their own beliefs on whats perverted or not, and I dont just mean sexual perversion.

*Spoiler* Everyone is "the biggest pervert in the world" *Spoiler*
You need to "dumb down" your view on sexuality. Your making it a much more complex game then it actually is.

 

[dottie]

every girl is different. not all girls like nice guys. not all girls like assholes. STOP GENERALIZING US.

 

[no1]

every girl is different. not all girls like nice guys. not all girls like assholes. STOP GENERALIZING US.

NO! For women it's easy to fall into the trap of thinking "I need to find the absolute best and most perfect ALPHA MALE SUPREME DOG" while us "LOWER BETA WIMP SISSY MALES" who don't force their way with women, deserve to die off in the name of "E-VOLITION"

and for the men that "I need to act like a f*cking asshole pack leader of the social hierarchy"

nvm, I went crazy thjere. sorry. I dont mean to generalize so much, but it's so easy to.

 

[dottie]

i know what you mean and i generalize all the time myself. i think i end up cornering myself where i don't want to be (unhappiness and isolation) because of it, but it's hard not to do. but like i said, although it seems most females are this way, there really, really are good females out there! don't give up hope.

 

[rado31]

NO! For women it's easy to fall into the trap of thinking "I need to find the absolute best and most perfect ALPHA MALE SUPREME DOG" while us "LOWER BETA WIMP SISSY MALES" who don't force their way with women, deserve to die off in the name of "E-VOLITION"

and for the men that "I need to act like a f*cking asshole pack leader of the social hierarchy"

nvm, I went crazy thjere. sorry. I dont mean to generalize so much, but it's so easy to.

You have plenty of energy, - help some people , apply to voulunteer, some physical labour will kill a philosopher in you. Women dont like philosophers.

 

[Perfidion]

Yeah, do something strenuous, requiring massive amounts of physical exertion. That way, you'll get some muscles, and girls like muscles. Two birds with one stone.

Yet another problem solved by Dr. Perfidion. Next please!

 

[freestylemonster]

I think what everybody is missing here is it's not JUST BEING AN ASSHOLE OR JUST BEING A NICE GUY. You can't go up to a girl and say "Hi, I'd like to have sex with you" But on the other hand if you don't imply that those are your intentions you also won't get her. What you need to do is flirt in a friendly way. Be nice, but also send the girl messages that you want her.

 

[Sure_whynot]

I think what everybody is missing here is it's not JUST BEING AN ASSHOLE OR JUST BEING A NICE GUY. You can't go up to a girl and say "Hi, I'd like to have sex with you" But on the other hand if you don't imply that those are your intentions you also won't get her. What you need to do is flirt in a friendly way. Be nice, but also send the girl messages that you want her.

Not true, I've personally done that and scored. (or... whatever oral counts as)
Except it was followed by "Oh, I'm tom by the way."
You'd be surprised how important a first impression is. In this case, It was obviously very memorable.

You did hit the nail on the head though. "Nice guys" & "assholes" are much less concrete then many people have suggested. I'm a nice guy (most of the time, just like everyone else) but obviously I've acted like an asshole before. If you think you've never done anything wrong, or never acted like an asshole before then your just lying to yourself. Also, everything is relative to your point of view. A hero in your eyes may be a villain in mine.