Northern Lad
Member
I really empathise with people who have suffered long term bullying and here is my story.
I was born in a small town in the northeast of England in 1964 according to the medical records early in the morning. My earliest memories seem to be a love of food and art and until I started junior school my life was pretty normal. .I cannot say why I became the attention of so much venom but I did and here are some of the incidents I recall. one of the first I remember is been tortured at the bottom corner of the field, been spat on and hit with sticks, we were playing japs and commandos a fun game unless you’re the P.O.W .Another is a having the whole class cheer on a girl as she punches you in the face I did manage to get away a few times but they cornered me and much to the crowds approval she forced herself on me. as a child you cannot reason why this is happening your just scared and try to figure out how to stop it.but for me it didn’t stop it just got worse the beatings became more frequent my confidence was slowly eroded away along with my self-esteem. And so I entered high school praying this would all go away like some horrible nightmare you wake from but because my grades were low I was placed in the bottom class and it is here I met my new school mates it didn’t take them long to show me what they had planned for the next 5 years ,I was stabbed with needles I still have the scars ,hung over stairwells, locked in small cupboards and the usual trying to get home in one piece terrified and angry I wanted to fight back but fear stopped me so I took the beatings and a strange thing happened I started to believe I was a bad person and deserve the punishment, physical scars heal but mental ones can last a life time. I enjoyed learning at school but on the days I would fake illness I remember just wanting never to go back. I left high school with low grades which meant I couldn’t go onto further education now at 16 physically and mentally scarred I wanted nothing to do with people but my father managed to encourage me into starting work at a local engineering college the prospect was nerve wracking but I summoned up what little confidence I had and took my first steps into a new career. My father was a welder by trade and I was curious to see if I had any of the skills I was surprised to see I enjoyed welding and slowly started to feel the tension and fear disappearing then one day when I came into work I saw one of the kids I use to go to school with from the moment I saw him I knew what was going to happen I was hoping I could leave all my troubled past behind me but once word got around the beatings started I was tied into a vice and set on fire, had my boiler suit ripped open with knifes ,kicked with steel cap boots I would come home in tears angry at my father for sending me to this place I could of left but why should I so I stayed for the whole year got my certificate but no job unfortunately. the next few years I did a few government schemes took a few beatings had a near death experience when someone rammed a mental spike through the cabin I was sitting in missed me be about a foot and so It went on until I was in my early twenty’s I can spot a bully a mile off now and I’ve met many of them although it’s more mental abuse than physical these days I would like to add I’ve spent many hours taking to various therapists and councillors looking for an answer but the truth is there is none except **** happens and you have to deal with it so I decided to go to college study hard and get my diploma we all face hardship as we go through life and that’s what defines us as a person.
I was born in a small town in the northeast of England in 1964 according to the medical records early in the morning. My earliest memories seem to be a love of food and art and until I started junior school my life was pretty normal. .I cannot say why I became the attention of so much venom but I did and here are some of the incidents I recall. one of the first I remember is been tortured at the bottom corner of the field, been spat on and hit with sticks, we were playing japs and commandos a fun game unless you’re the P.O.W .Another is a having the whole class cheer on a girl as she punches you in the face I did manage to get away a few times but they cornered me and much to the crowds approval she forced herself on me. as a child you cannot reason why this is happening your just scared and try to figure out how to stop it.but for me it didn’t stop it just got worse the beatings became more frequent my confidence was slowly eroded away along with my self-esteem. And so I entered high school praying this would all go away like some horrible nightmare you wake from but because my grades were low I was placed in the bottom class and it is here I met my new school mates it didn’t take them long to show me what they had planned for the next 5 years ,I was stabbed with needles I still have the scars ,hung over stairwells, locked in small cupboards and the usual trying to get home in one piece terrified and angry I wanted to fight back but fear stopped me so I took the beatings and a strange thing happened I started to believe I was a bad person and deserve the punishment, physical scars heal but mental ones can last a life time. I enjoyed learning at school but on the days I would fake illness I remember just wanting never to go back. I left high school with low grades which meant I couldn’t go onto further education now at 16 physically and mentally scarred I wanted nothing to do with people but my father managed to encourage me into starting work at a local engineering college the prospect was nerve wracking but I summoned up what little confidence I had and took my first steps into a new career. My father was a welder by trade and I was curious to see if I had any of the skills I was surprised to see I enjoyed welding and slowly started to feel the tension and fear disappearing then one day when I came into work I saw one of the kids I use to go to school with from the moment I saw him I knew what was going to happen I was hoping I could leave all my troubled past behind me but once word got around the beatings started I was tied into a vice and set on fire, had my boiler suit ripped open with knifes ,kicked with steel cap boots I would come home in tears angry at my father for sending me to this place I could of left but why should I so I stayed for the whole year got my certificate but no job unfortunately. the next few years I did a few government schemes took a few beatings had a near death experience when someone rammed a mental spike through the cabin I was sitting in missed me be about a foot and so It went on until I was in my early twenty’s I can spot a bully a mile off now and I’ve met many of them although it’s more mental abuse than physical these days I would like to add I’ve spent many hours taking to various therapists and councillors looking for an answer but the truth is there is none except **** happens and you have to deal with it so I decided to go to college study hard and get my diploma we all face hardship as we go through life and that’s what defines us as a person.
