That's It! I've had it!

[17-1]

Alright, That's it I've had it!
I have been a member here since quite a while, though I haven't posted anything yet, I was always too afraid and hesitant to post due to being social phobic.

but I've had it, My social phobia has grown very severe and I haven't spoken to anyone for months.
I'm currently in a state of severe depression.
And I really really need someone to talk with right now and to cheer me up.
So there, I'm gonna have to stop being afraid, and post something!

I've been social phobic since age 10, and never had any friends ever since. Well, I had a few, but they rejected me . so, when I found out they were deliberately rejecting me, from that moment I stopped making friends.

No one, absolutely No one here understands what social phobia is exactly, so from where I live, as far as I'm concerned a lot of people here are almost outgoing.
You rarely find social phobics here.

I absolutely hate being social phobic, a lot of people here think that I'm a strange person.
The students in my school ignore me cuz they think I'm a weird person for being so quite and unsocial, and that really upsets me.

This phobia has to be confronted, but I have no idea how.
I'm clearly in a state of desperation, so I need serious help.


Thanks for reading, please reply and don't ignore this thread.
It was a really hard thing for me to do, Cuz I'm really very scared of posting cuz I'm afraid of being ignored.
I can't stand being rejected all the time.

Also, There are a few things you need to know about me, Sometimes I don't socialize well online either. and also, English is not my native language, so forgive me for any grammatical or vocabulary mistakes.

thanks,

 

[sidney]

your grammer was very good actually
but if we werent socila phobics then we wouldnt be here, would we? we're probably outgoing on here cus its the only chance we have to be like that & its so much easier to talk to people when your not face to face, or at least thats just my opinion, but yes ive had SP and others for quite some time & i was at your stage a while ago but just hold on cus you'll find someone that you can be real friends with its just that theres so little of them out there so you need to wait for someone good to come along

 

[flake__]

17-1 well done for posting first time that's awesome! There's loadsa people that join sa forums and never post, seriously, it's a very common fear!! Well done for breaking your boundaries.

Also, your english is excellent 8)

No one, absolutely No one here understands what social phobia is exactly, so from where I live, as far as I'm concerned a lot of people here are almost outgoing.
You rarely find social phobics here.

I'm afraid that's a pretty big assumption there 17-1, social phobics are EVERYWHERE! And more common than you think too. I've never met anyone just randomly that is sa, they don't tend to show themselves too well! It's common to look round your school and think 'i'm the only one!' (i did) but it's probably your sa-filter not being too objective tbh. Besides which, many people have probs, besides sa, you might think 'oh they're loud and happy' but deffo not the case. Some even hide shyness behind loudness.

I think you should congratulate yourself on your moment of 'realisation', it is something not everyone gets. It gives you the motivation to DO something, whatever step you may decide that is. Personally i would visit your doctor and be upfront, and if you haven't done so yet tell your family. Or you could just take small steps like posting on here/finding online friends. There are many methods out there to 'confront this thing' including self-help books which you can do alone.

Hope this helps, and remember to not beat yourself up so much (some would even say Accepting yourself is the key to getting out of this :wink: ) as beating yourself is actually part of your sa! If you weren't afraid you would talk more remember, no point beating yourself up for being afraid

 

[recluse]

I honestly would never guess that English is not your native language when reading your post. I just want to say that we are in the same boat here and you are not alone, sorry i can't think of anything else to cheer you up with. Where are you from anyway?

 

[17-1]

Hello guys,
First of all, I want to say thank you all for your replies, You've been really supportive.

Sidney, thanks I hope I make a lot of friends here in this forum

and flake__ yes I know that social phobia is very common, but not where I live. people here are relatively outgoing and extroverted.
And they find untalkative and unsocial people rather strange..
They don't know anything about social phobia..

And recluse, That's ok as long as you replied.
I'm from UAE btw

 

[HH]

Hi 17-1. You've overcome one problem by posting on here, that's definately a great start. Now maybe try and post on other forums and once you're comfortable doing that maybe talk to someone on the phone. I think the key to combating this is just take small steps like this and don't rush. Forget about what happened in the past (I know its hard) start changing today, who cares what some people said years ago-sod them. good luck

 

[17-1]

Thanks HH

 

[tommydog]

Hey 17-1

Dont be afraid of posting here. Granted you wont always get replies but while everyones conditions here differ in the details we all know what its like so your with people that understand.

UAE sounds like not a bad place Dubai looks like it would be worth a visit is that were your at ? Whats it like ? I know loads of Arabs, especially Lebanese.

Do you know how you came to have your condition ? You said you got in when you were 10, so maybe if you work out how it came about you can start trying to do the opposite to whatever it was that started it all, know what i mean ? Thats one of the things iv tryed to do and iv improved dramatically.

 

[scissorhands]

firststep - making a post

second step - posting a photo

 

[17-1]

Hey 17-1

Dont be afraid of posting here. Granted you wont always get replies but while everyones conditions here differ in the details we all know what its like so your with people that understand.

UAE sounds like not a bad place Dubai looks like it would be worth a visit is that were your at ? Whats it like ? I know loads of Arabs, especially Lebanese.

Do you know how you came to have your condition ? You said you got in when you were 10, so maybe if you work out how it came about you can start trying to do the opposite to whatever it was that started it all, know what i mean ? Thats one of the things iv tryed to do and iv improved dramatically.

Hello Tommy, Yea Dubai is a great place, you should come by some time and check it out. I'm sure you're gonna like it here, it's definitely worth visiting.
And about my social anxiety, Not sure if there are any past experiences that might have caused this. but I think it's something that I naturally have since I'm a highly sensitive person, you know what I mean?

 

[tommydog]

I certainly do.