You could always have someone HELP you with your benefits forms? Like a family member? If they won't help you, you can go to some type of counselor and explain your situation, they could help you too... There are a lot of people in this world willing to help you.
Life is difficult, if not teetering on the edge of unbearable for A LOT of people. It's not only you who has extreme difficulties. We all have trials and tribulations. You need to remember that things CAN get better... It might be a long road, but they CAN.
To me, life is about learning, and getting through the hard times, enjoying the good times. Let me tell you, if you can get through your hardships you will be that much stronger for it. If you can survive and accept your hardships, you will be that much stronger for it. You need to find a reason to live. There is always a reason, underneath all of it, there is a reason flowing.. A good reason to live, no matter how low you get. Don't let that little "suicidal voice" inside your head trick you into thinking that's what you want.
Have you ever gone to a doctor about your problems??