suicidal thoughts.

[doctor_who]

I don't want to die. Life is pretty good..ive been dealing with my social anxiety quiet well..ive been having laughs with people and have a new found confidence when talking to people even folks I dont know. I have stopped cutting myself as much and am feeling great..and exicted to see what happens next. However ive been having frequent suicidal thoughts ( repeat i don't want to kill myself) they scare me I can be walking across a road and a car comes and I want to step out, I go to the knife draw to get a knife to make dinner and I think of stabbing myself, I can be going to the shop and think I want to buy medication to take an overdose....these thoughts are frequent and can appear at random times...they make me scared because I have never had so intense thoughts...ive never done any of these things but I dont know why id think like that...im scared of myself

 

[kihira]

I understand what you mean as I have similar thoughts that just come from nowhere, they happen more frequently when I'm feeling under pressure and can occur many times a day. I try to simply let them come and go, like traffic passing, the thought fades soon enough. It's like having a stain on my memory from the past when I felt at my worst.

 

[ImNotMyIllness]

I wonder if those thoughts have anything to do with OCD.............For me, when I get very depressed I have a lot of intense suicidal thoughts. That's what I'm going through now.

 

[doctor_who]

I do have alot of stress right now with exams and moving place and general work stress..maybe just need a holiday. ..i am worried though but as long as I don't act on the thoughts then ill be fine.

 

[theslowesthand]

You may or may not subscribe to all this new-age stuff, but from my understanding the "universe is stepping-it-up" right now (in past few years). For myself these last few years have gotten CRAZY-HARD like never before, and my sleep dreams are just "non-stop" right now .. they just won't quit. So what i'm saying is that if you have "issues", then the universe is "forcing your hand" right now. It's evolve-or-die time now......

 

[Feathers]

Are you on any meds that could have this as side effect? You might check with a doctor to adjust dosage or get new ones then.
Interesting observation that it might be from stress, hm... It does sound a bit unusual...
Hope you find some time for rest and relaxation! and that it gets better!