Sufering from Obsessive thoughts

[fellowocd]

Hello!
I am 38 years old. I have OCD for almost last 15 years. In the beginning it was more of “C" part (repetitive checking, need of reassurances etc.) but for last 4 years "O" part is dominating ("C" part remains the same).
My major problem is sexual obsession, though in real life I am a perfectly normal person. I get obsessive images and thoughts about people around me including my close relatives, friends and colleagues. These thoughts make me terribly upset and my anxiety rises to a high level. I am scared that my thoughts would turn into actions.
I know there are plenty of medicines available for OCD but I don't want to go for it considering the higher possibility of their side effects.
Can anybody please suggest me some way to get rid of these obsessive thoughts? If it is not possible to eliminate them completely, how should I fight with them?
Thanks.

 

[whitemind]

hi,even I have this kind of obsessions,I think you should spend much time with your favourite things,and even with people you love,maybe in this way your anxiety will decrease....I hope I wrote well

 

[meme]

i have these too and they were so horrible.! i have never really told anyone about them and doubt i will because they are too upsetting. but i can deal with them and here's what i did.
i researched "fantasy" and learned that everyone explores "possibilities" in their minds. now, i think ocd'ers like myself have it worse because we have trouble shaking these obsessions, but what helped me is to know that my mind is a wacky place. i hate my thoughts at times, but your minds is safe, meaning just because you think something does not mean you will do it.

i still hate it when i think of these, but its much easier to deal with just knowing that it's not really a true reflection of who i am.

 

[Justdive]

thoughts are just that.....

Meme's post is right on! We as humans have the ability of thinking anything. That does not mean we will act on any of them. The thoughts that may scare you are the the thoughts you try to push out of your head and they don't go away. Why?? Because you just gave them substance! You gave them power. When you let those thoughts come in your mind and you "play" with them, test them to get worse, when you challenge them.... they start to not matter.
The next time you are around a relative and a thought comes to mind of you and this person, play with it. Imagine yourself with this person. Imagine a scenario of the two of you hooking up and going wild and doing whatever(male or female). It may make you ill, lol, but you will see, if you do it successfully, the anxiety of this thought WILL dissipate and your obsessions will lessen. The more you try to stop these thoughts, the more they will haunt you.
I don't know what kind of person you are, so I can not say with all certainty that you will not act out on your thoughts but I don't think you would be posting here if that was an issue. I just think your thoughts are scaring you, thus creating more OC thoughts and anxiety.
good luck
Joe

 

[RedRibbons]

I have the same thing. It really used to stress me out a lot, but, the thoughts don't stress me out so much anymore. In fact! Sometimes when I get these thoughts, I entertain them (if they're about people I don't feel completely and utterly disgusting having the thoughts about).

I still get anxiety, not when I have the thoughts, but when I encounter the people I have the thoughts about. And I worry about blushing, and I generally feel awkward.

You know, something I never pieced together.. I always thought I was just obsessive.. and not so much compulsive, but for a while there, I thought, and still do think, that if I could just have some satisfying sex, lol, the thoughts would/will stop... They don't. I still hope they will though, one day. :?

I think the best thing to do, is just accept the thoughts, purely as thoughts. Knowing that you wouldn't act on them. And if you get ones that you are okay with having... lol, enjoy them (I know that sounds odd, but it entertains me! haha)

Anyway, I hope you feel better, and just relax, knowing that they're just thoughts, and other people have the same problem, and you'll be okay!

Edit! lol. my post sounds silly! Oh well. I guess I just indulged in the the thoughts that I didn't absolutely 100% hate. It kinda pushes the other ones that I really do hate away. ^^

 

[paulmm]

sexual obsessions are basically my middle name.

what i tell myself is that there is no sexual activity except for rape that is immoral (because true morality is any action that does not harm oneself or another). therefore, if you have obsessions about having sex with your mother, brother, sister, child, dog, cat, fish, etc., none of these things make you a bad person. when you start feeling irresistable urges to rape someone or molest a child, this is when you should be concerned about your sexuality, but there is something arousing in every kind of sex, regardless of partner, so dont be afraid when you find something gross kind of arousing.

also, testing never works. i used to test myself like once a minute. id imagine myself having sex with a relative and see if i get aroused, and i did. every time. at the same time, it was really weird to imagine, but i was worried that i was only making it feel weird because i knew that it was taboo, and down deep i wanted to have sex with my relatives. well, in reality, every male wants to fuck every female (regardless of age and relationship) deep deep down because we're biologically programmed to reproduce. its social norms and platonic feelings that suppress these desires so that families can be formed logically.

meme was right, play with the idea. fantasize about things that are bothering you and when you desensitize them (realize that its not wrong to think about them) youre obsessions with slowly go away.

 

[HexNoir]

From having a few years' experience with ocd, I found out something really interesting about the whole mess. If you allow these thoughts to happen, and recognize them as scenarios that will ONLY happen in your head, have a ball. If you can truly accept that they gross you out and you feel repulsed by them, but at the same time not so afraid of them, you'll begin to feel less of a need.

Just as an example, like I said, I used to have a million different obsessive compulsive disorders - things I had to do over and over again, things I had to think about excessively, etc - but if I were to put myself in your position, since I have no fears of these things ever becoming actions for me, I have no fear whatsoever about thinking these thoughts.

In conclusion, yes, you can get over it. But first you may just have to accept them as thoughts - and trust yourself to know you'd never take any sort of action related to these thoughts. It might be hard, but it's worth the struggle. face the fear - move towards rather than away.

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