That may very well be, but their love is shallow and toxic. A little food and money means nothing to me, physical and intellectual affection means everything. They always made me follow their ideals without questioning, only to unwillingly show me one day how flawed they were, and that these flaws would not go away for anything. I cannot stand these people who tried to raise me to be so perfect in every way and who do not even have enough strength and flexibility of mind to stand up for themselves in real life. They're sloppy manipulators who do not truly know what they want, and hypocritical parrots.
I know how you exactly feel. My parents are like yours too. They don't like me questioning them and sometimes they contradict themselves and yes they are hypocritical too. Like my parents don't allow me to have my computer in my room cause they're afraid of the bad fumes it produces but yet they have a TV in there room.....
Yeah one of the things I hate about my parents is that they don't show me affection. It pisses me off cause I feel I cannot talk to them about my problems without getting into a fight and me ending up getting hurt. I also hate how it seems they're always against what I say even though I was right in the situation. Like for example this guy who was my friend, he got me and his other friend to fight each other. Yeah he's a sicko, but it's cause he's mentally disabled.... Anyways, I stopped being friends with them and was at peace with the other friend. I told my parents what happened and all they said was "oh so you're not friends anymore. You're always losing friends".
I was like WTF!? This guy betrayed and manipulate me and that's all you could say. Then we got into a bit of an argument. And to them it seems like I was at fault. Like these things piss me off badly about my parents. It's like they have no emotional support for me or don't know how to show it properly.
I'm Chinese btw and in there "suppose" culture it's the way things are. When I talk to some of my Chinese friends they say the same thing and some of them don't like it too.
Look man not all parents are perfect, no, no one's perfect. They're only human.
Hmmmm all I can say about what your parents want from you is don't let it bother you and drag you down. As you probably know you are your own person, you be who you want to be. And in life you can't please anyone. There's a story behind this concept if you want to hear it. It's quite interesting.
It's interesting that you bring the cultural gap. My parents never transmitted me anything from their culture, except a tiny bit of religion which they never took too seriously and finally grew enough balls to throw in a trash can for good. Even my father's father doesn't go to church anymore, something I think he still feels weird about. I feel more American than Canadian, but that's probably just me being raised by a T.V. and a pro-american guy talking on the radio.
Oh I see
Yeah I know you feel angry about this. I can understand why. But as I said you're parents aren't perfect.
lol I think everyone feels american in a way cause we're all being americanised through there products.... no offence. I mean most TV shows in Australia, where I'm from are from America or copied in some way from America and localized.
I may have live with French-Canadians all my life, but I never became one of them, in fact I can barely speak French.
I know how you feel about not fitting in. I mean I have a mental disability called Asperger's Disorder which I mentioned to you in another post. It makes it difficult for me to communicate with people and so called "normal" people tend to back away from me cause I'm weird enough for them.
Can I ask you a question is english the official language there? Cause if it is, it's them they should learn to speak english, not you speaking french cause whatever country ur in it's that language you should learn to speak.
I think that over the years with all the reading about philosophy and all that, that I developed a culture and religion of my own making.
That's good. That is what defines you and that is what you are
But just remember that not everyone will agree with your philosophies and you have to respect that, just like you probably won't agree with some of there philsophies. Everyone has different beliefs.
I already understand why they are the way they are. It's not difficult to see that what they see is themselves at a younger age and subconsciously repeat their parent's behavior, but never stop to think or care and figure out how the little child is feeling. They already got a lot of psychological issues of their own. With them, it's always about themselves. Affection goes one way, ME, ME, ME. Where am I in there? And of course I'm the one who's selfish as they never get enough of it.
My parents are exactly like that or it seems that way to me. Yeah I think my parents have psycological issues too.... And yeah I do believe it's cause they repeat there parents behaviour. Hey in a way it's a good thing cause if we become parents we know not to behave that way to our children, well if you want. Yeah I hate when my parents only want things there way and don't want to compromise.....
Have you thought about maybe taking your parents to a counselling session with you. Like maybe you can pinpoint the exact problem and come to some compromise. Believe me you might be surprised what you find out and they might be surprised too. Trust me it's from personal experience
I don't know if I'll ever become a parent, but rest assured that I'll be watching over myself so that I do not repeat the same mistakes they did. Raising kids is supposed to be like growing a garden, not like taming wild animals, even if that's what they are at the beginning.
Who knows mate, maybe you'll meet your lover one day unexpectely. That's how I met my 1st girlfriend, I didn't expect it. We talked a bit and next thing I knew I fell for her
Like she has only been my girlfriend thus far but hey I guess it shows that your lover is out there somewhere
lol I like your anology of how raising kids should be like growing a garden and not taming animals. It's a good anology
Here's a random fact for you. If you're good with taking care of pets, like cats/dogs then you'll be good with children
I am already well aware of that, but the tricky part is that you cannot remember this all the time. It can be easy for your body to trick you into believing that it comes from the outside. It's like dreaming, it's so damn hard to realize that it's happening, even though it's dead obvious.
Cool, yeah I know it can be that way. But I guess you just have to keep that fact in mind when you can. It's just about putting effort in to remember it. lol yeah I know what you mean about the dreaming bit
