Sorta dating question...Don't know what to think ?

JackOfSpades

Well-known member
The timeframe is a little hard for me to follow. You messaged her months ago, but she deleted the page when?

I'd probably keep it light and not bring it up now either. I'd just ask her how she's been, what she's been up to, and see if you can find anything to comment on and talk to. You could say some things about yourself, new interests etc. But I wouldn't talk too much about hardship at this point. Being positive and a little confident is good if you can muster it. I wouldn't gush too much. Being a little silly from time to time is good too. Maybe at the end tell her it's been nice talking to her and you'd like to do it again sometime, but I'd play some of that interest a little closely. Not completely closely, but leaving a little room.

I'm not sure if this helps at all but I hope some part is useful. Just my opinion.
 

teandtoast

Well-known member
The timeframe is a little hard for me to follow. You messaged her months ago, but she deleted the page when?

I'd probably keep it light and not bring it up now either. I'd just ask her how she's been, what she's been up to, and see if you can find anything to comment on and talk to. You could say some things about yourself, new interests etc. But I wouldn't talk too much about hardship at this point. Being positive and a little confident is good if you can muster it. I wouldn't gush too much. Being a little silly from time to time is good too. Maybe at the end tell her it's been nice talking to her and you'd like to do it again sometime, but I'd play some of that interest a little closely. Not completely closely, but leaving a little room.

I'm not sure if this helps at all but I hope some part is useful. Just my opinion.

yeh that does help thanks Jack!
 

OceanMist

Well-known member
I hear ya on things that are sickening. It's completely sickening when someone is practically drowning in their own bitterness and negativity so they try to drag as many people down with them as they possibly can.

Another thing that's sickening,while we're on the subject, is someone who has such a tainted,skewed view of women when deep down the person knows absolutely NOTHING about women and how the minds and hearts of women work. It's sickening when these types of people try to speak about a woman's motives as though they're experts while everyone else,including the women themselves,are completely clueless on the subject.

My post wasn't just directed at women, men can do the same thing, just talk to women to be nice. In this case, it was a woman who was doing it, so yeah, I was talking about this particular woman.

Statistically women reject men more than men reject women, it's not like I'm breaking new ground here by talking about this.

I've been on dates with more than 10 different women, so it's not like I have no clue what women are like as you seem to think.

I'm sorry you disagree with what I'm saying. Agree to disagree, I guess.

As for you claiming I'm being bitter, I'm not sure where you are getting that from. My posts are based more on reality. This thread is bascially a complaint is based on rejection, and was elaborating on that.

I don't see how that makes me bitter? Do you want to me to lie to the OP and not tell him what I think of the situation?
 

OceanMist

Well-known member
From you posts about women you seem to be very bitter. You might want to look into that. It could be the reason you don;t seem to find women that want more than one date with you. I mean I don;t have all that much success with the opposite sex but I know not all women are like the ones I have run into and know there are good women out there. You on the other hand seem to just hold onto the bitterness or atleast thats the way you come off.

Again, I honestly don't understand why you think I'm bitter?

There are both negative and positive things in this world, and one of the negative unfortunate things are that women often will reject men, especially shy men.

I'm not bitter about it, I just know that it happens often, and I believe this is a case where it's happening to the OP.
 

OceanMist

Well-known member
[QUOTEteandtoast;Oceanmist - I totally hear what you're saying to be fair, which is why it kind of confuses me. I'm not getting my hopes up but if she was nicely telling me she was not interested why add me on facebook.

I already explained this. She is just trying to be nice, bro. It's kind of like a consolation prize.

These people are trying to feed you fantasy stuff that will make you think she's interested in dating you because they don't want you to feel bad either.

Rejection isn't necessarily the worst thing that can happen to you. We have to learn what it feels like so we can realize that we can live through it and move on the next woman.

Funny thing is she used to be friends with me on facebook about 6 years ago but then deleted me around them,

Omg dude, that is a huge sign that she's not interested. I'm sorry if that sounds rude, I'm really not trying to be, but if a woman ever deletes you from facebook.....that aint good.

the online dating saga was about 2 months ago and she only has about 300 facebook friends (so it's not like she's one of these people who add anyone and everyone with thousands of friends)....which is why I find it weird as if I was her why would she even bother making friends with me as she knows I showed interest in her in terms of dating previously and could give wrong impression and Im sure she woouldnt want the fuss with that type of thing of someone bothering her if she has no interest.
who knows


300 is still quite a bit of friends on there.

I don't find it weird at all that she is doing what she's doing. As I said b4, it's a classic case of friend zoning you. Either that or she just wants you as an online friend and that's it.
 

JackOfSpades

Well-known member
I'm finding this thread hard to follow. Did she say nicely she wasn't interested or are you gathering that from her deleting you from Facebook or deleting her dating profile? Some of this is relatable to me and I'm not going to say your chances are great but they are far from abysmal. From my perspective you have two things on your side. 1. You've dated before. Especially if things ended because you were shy, this is good. It shows she has had an interest in you and is capable of having one. 2. Time. I believe time is a good thing. It allows everything to reset. The fact is people do get friend zoned and do get expected to be something. And trying to break that mold is hard. But people change over time, and that is understood and accepted. It gives you the chance to be someone new to her. Someone you weren't before, and in my opinion being a better or less shy version of the you she remembers would make her take notice you're not that old guy she thinks she knows already. I have been here before, so I'm not just making things up. I don't know if it's all going to work out, but if it does, those two points will be big factors.
 

Mario8

Banned
Oh, golden post. :perfect:

It's okay, everyone. OceanMist's views should not be taken with any truth. He has a history of misogyny that he chooses not to acknowledge.
Once again, I'm not a mysoginist. I honestly don't know what I'm saying that expresses hate toward women?

After reading some of your reply's, I have to say that I don`t think that your a misogynist, and I don`t think that your bitter. I just think that your simply a person that try`s to stay ahead of the "game". That`s all. Your single, so your looking for women. I honestly don`t understand whats the big deal here. Unless its by intention, I think that no guy thats on the lookout likes to end up in the friend zone. Your just doing what you think works for you, and your trying to avoid all the little games in between, to reach your objective. That`s all there is to it, I think. Misogyny is a very strong word to be tossed around lightly. I could be wrong, but for now I don`t think that you qualify for that horrible title. Your just a player XD.
 
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sullyS25

Well-known member
I didnt read everyone elses responses but I dont think she deleted her account or information because of you. Girls on dating sites receive up to 100 messages a day. Especially if they are hot....Usually these messages are from creeps looking for sex and so the girls get sick of it and peace out.

I think you need to realize that you were assuming things that arent necessarily true. I do it all the time personally.
 
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