Someone told me maybe I should change who and what

[Jesushasomeoneforme]

Someone told me I need to change what and who I'm sexually attracted to. The women I'm attracted to are never so far romantically attracted back and the women that are romantically interested I am not interested in back. A viscious cycle. I do not want to change because it seems to hard. I asked God to change me and he hasn't. Why? What should I do? I'm 37 and have a lot of anxiety. Please help sa friends.

 

[google]

yeah, god
what a ****

 

[Krista]

You have to know that it's going to be alright. I do the same thing a lot of the time, in terms of being attracted easily to people I know I can't have, won't be able to get or don't have the same interest in me as opposed to some of the guys who have liked me and I don't want. Look at it as; you know who and what kind of women you're interested in and you know what kind you aren't. You can't change how you react to some people but you can change the qualities and reasons you're looking for in a person. I know you can't make yourself become physically attracted to anyone and it's not being picky, it's just finding what makes you happy but in the healthy way.

If you know you're going after women that are out of reach for you and always will be, that's something you have to change yourself. But if it's of all the women who have liked you before just don't appeal to what you want, wait it out. BUT only if it's the healthy kind of not being attracted, and not the kind where you're holding out for someone you can't have.

 

[PunkRotten]

I suggest you give up this whole idea of trying to date when you are so desperate and insecure, and should be focusing on your own needs. No one is entitled to anything in life. I know you are probably in denial and refuse to accept this, but you are gonna have to suck it up.

You probably will be mad at me for saying this, but I feel someone needs to put it to you this way instead of beating around the bush.

 

[Interzone]

I suggest you give up this whole idea of trying to date when you are so desperate and insecure, and should be focusing on your own needs. No one is entitled to anything in life. I know you are probably in denial and refuse to accept this, but you are gonna have to suck it up.

You probably will be mad at me for saying this, but I feel someone needs to put it to you this way instead of beating around the bush.

I beg to differ, I think love and compassion are one of the most important things people are entitled to in life, no matter who you are. Of course, you should also treat others with love and compassion.

Among other things, I think there are plenty of things people are entitled to.

 

[Harleyq]

I suggest you give up this whole idea of trying to date when you are so desperate and insecure, and should be focusing on your own needs.

Ditto, but only if you're actively attempting to date. If you're talking in generalities ("It just so happens that women I like and women who like me are not working in my favor") as opposed to specifics ("I've been trying to get a gf but the women I like don't like me back"), then I don't think you have much to worry about. Same thing happens to me. Guys who want to date me are usually not my type and vice versa.

If this is a problem you've noticed occurring while seeking a girlfriend, well...you may not realize it but if you're desperate and insecure, it shows. One of my friends broke up with his gf before coming to University and when we met, he was in the process of trying to flirt with every girl he found pretty. He REALLY wanted another gf and it was quite noticeable. Just about every girl he flirted with knew exactly what he was doing and while they were ok with being friends with him, his behavior acted as a turn-off, romantically. Who wants to date someone who's obviously going after these other people too? Who wants to date someone who's obviously looking to date someone to fill their own insecurities, as opposed to because they genuinely like and want to be with the person they're flirting with? Anyways, the girl who did become interested in him was a friend he had no romantic interest in, whatsoever.