I happened to say hi to someone I knew from school over Facebook because I was desperate for someone to talk to. A few days later and they've answered. They were still not a friend but someone nice and the only person from school who I'd want to meet again. What do I do though... I don't want to tell them I'm a failure... but at the same time I want to explain everything the see if they'd help me out. Of course if I do that they will probably never speak to me again. What should I do, maybe I should leave it for 30 years for when I'm hopefully better... or maybe there isn't a hope in hell that they'll ever want to meet up and I shouldn't worry about what I say?
Someone from school
- Thread starter aj
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market.garden
Well-known member
What makes you think they'd never want to speak to you again? Maybe you should give it a go...you never know, you might end up becoming good friends 
I hope that's what would happen, but if someone you hadn't seen for seven years suddenly got in contact with you and said they had no friends (well okay obviously I wouldn't be as blunt as that), what would you do? Anyway, I've learnt that basically anyone who knows me does not want to meet up with me in any way ever, so why would this person be any different?
Well okay being positive (ha!) and supposing they did, what would be a normal thing to start of with, assuming we don't really have any interests in common? I seem to have been too full on or something in the past so I don't really have a clue
Well okay being positive (ha!) and supposing they did, what would be a normal thing to start of with, assuming we don't really have any interests in common? I seem to have been too full on or something in the past so I don't really have a clue
market.garden
Well-known member
Maybe it'd be good to just chat on Facebook for a while, without rushing into anything. And don't appear too full on like you said you have done in the past.
You might find after a while that you have some similar interests. Just ask him/her what they've been up to/what they're doing now.
You might find after a while that you have some similar interests. Just ask him/her what they've been up to/what they're doing now.
market.garden
Well-known member
Well, just make sure you don't become obsessed with the idea of meeting up straight away and becoming best mates, let it happen naturally. So just chat to them in a casual way.
Yeah I know you can't force anything. The worst thing about the thought patterns is that if you do something wrong, you will never be told what it was. All you know is that you did something wrong - go and try another person.
About building relationships, well I realised years ago that I never asked anyone to do anything myself, always waited for them, and so they never became friends... then I tried being proactive, and it made it worse, if anything.
The worst thing about the thought patterns is that if you do something wrong, you will never be told what it was. All you know is that you did something wrong - go and try another person.About building relationships, well I realised years ago that I never asked anyone to do anything myself, always waited for them, and so they never became friends... then I tried being proactive, and it made it worse, if anything.
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market.garden
Well-known member
All you can do is be yourself and let things happen at their own pace, and think positive!
Right... so there's this person you knew but weren't close with at school, you're talking with them again, how do you ask to meet up without suggesting a reunion of the entire year or something? I would just ask but without advice I don't think I can do it without sounding creepy.