Some Good things about SP

[Ladystardust]

SP is a really dificult hing to live with I know but it does have its positive side. I have had SP all my life and as a child I developed a good sense of self protection. my parents, my mother in paticular, did not take much interest in me so I often wandered of on my own usually to the local park.
There were others there of course, but because of my sp (or shyness as the family called it) I keep well away from boys in groups or lone strangers. I have also found I can bloke out people talking some people would call this ignorng them. This is the two good things I came up with anyone got anymore?

 

[Anonymous]

Yep... My agorapohobia and social anxiety keeps me inside, I don't really feel like a prisoner, I feel safe, and I find things to do that keep me busy and I don't mind it... if I were socializing, I be stressed trying to meet demands, there would be those who reject me, don't accept me and hurt me because of it, so I aviod a lot negative feelings. I really do not need any more belittlement because my self image or ego is at an all time unchangable LOW to begin with.

I'm never put on the spot for someone who needs my last dollar more than I do or wants to borrow anything. I'm never ridiculed or poo-pooed for the way I dress, wear my hear, etc. I chose what I want to do, where I want to go, and I don't need to go places I don't really want to go to make others happy. I don't have people trying convincing me to spend my already low amount of money on things I really don't need ("Let's go have a drink") ("You would look so GREAT in those sunglasses!")

 

[arlequin]

It's a good thing trying to found the good side of sp. I have also developed a selfprotection sense which has given me a independent behaviour so I has not to depend of other people and I can do a lot things on my own like travelling alone.... "Thanks" to sp I have also found and artistic side inside of me I did not know I had. To fill the many hours I spent alone I started practising photography and painting and they have become my two most major hobbies.

 

[Jarous]

This is all nice but I get a feeling it's only calling a necesssity a virtue ... protection? This is like the proverbial ships locked forever in a safe harbour - not much use but guaranteed never to sink ... artisitc side? What makes you think you wouldn't have found it without SAD? ... not spedning money on alcohol and useless trinckets? DO we have a choice? It is like saying an eunuch is chaste!!!

 

[solo1]

Okay Jarous.. you MAY be making some points here--- BUT--- considering there is no cure for this bull^*&) or no 'pot of gold' at the end of the rainbow, nothing to even WORK for or accomplish except for maybe a little improvement (with no guarentees or relapse).... I would much rather ATTEMPT making some good of it all and make the time semi-useful verses whing, moaning, groaning, licking my wounds, & feeling sorry for myself and getting so consumed with despair and hopelessness that I just want to end it once and for all.

Maybe, just maybe the ship might feel a wee bit good about itself and make some sort of impression on/in life before sinking, even if it never does leave port which, in my opinion is a landslide better than just sitting there getting rusty!!

(I was the anonymous guest in this thread previously)

 

[Jarous]

there is no cure for this bull^*&

You know, Solo, no matter what you think on this issue, you are right ... therefore I'd rather believe there's a solution (and even be possibly wrong than don't believe and be right from the start...)

Maybe, just maybe the ship might feel a wee bit good about itself and make some sort of impression on/in life before sinking

Well, I'm not sure why the arguing because that's exactly what I ment (I should express myself more clearly...) Like comforting yourself you are a poet thanks to SAD is a guarantee and a nice alibi never to try and change a state (I'm sure) you despise...


That said I actually think there might be a good side ... we are often underestimated - and that can be exploited to our advantage ... :roll: if only we had the guts to use the advatage <sigh>

 

[solo1]

Gee, Jarous, I didn't know I was looking for an argument, I thought I was making points like you were. Sorry! I didn't mean to give you that impression!

I also apologisz if I misread or intrepreted your post incorrectly, but to me, it sounded as if you were 'putting us down' for trying to make fuctional, creative use of our time. I think it's WONDERFUL that Arlequin is painting and taking pictures and I wouldn't want to think of them second guessing doing it because of their ship not leaving port. The painting/photograp[hy could strat up the engine and give that ship a HUGE shove out of port and into journeys and destinations beyong their wildest dreams!

 

[Jarous]

Solo, first - do not apologise that much. I've noticed this is a common fault among us SAD suffering ... just stand your ground.

And I agree with you - painting, photography and other creative activities are worthwile and great - but I just can't see them as results of SAD. And I perceive real damage done if you say (and think) "my SAD is good because I am more thinking/creative/imaginative this way" or something like that. Show me a proof that there is a link between someone's artistic talent and SAD and I'll shut up instantly...

 

[solo1]

OK then Jarous... I only apologise a wee little bit!

I see what you are pointing out! I don't think 'talent', creativity, etc., is credited to the SP nessessarily either, BUT---- it could be that the talent wouldn't have been discovered as soon if we didn't have the idle time or determination to discover it. And, maybe we wouldn't have even attempted, or even challenged ourselves to meaningful things if not for the meaningless phobia.

 

[chris11]

SP is a really dificult hing to live with I know but it does have its positive side. I have had SP all my life and as a child I developed a good sense of self protection. my parents, my mother in paticular, did not take much interest in me so I often wandered of on my own usually to the local park.
There were others there of course, but because of my sp (or shyness as the family called it) I keep well away from boys in groups or lone strangers. I have also found I can bloke out people talking some people would call this ignorng them. This is the two good things I came up with anyone got anymore?

I'm sorry, but there is absolutly no reason why you think that social phobia is a good thing to have. With that said, it does provide you with some experiances that most don't have, which could give you some insight.