sahxox
Well-known member
Hey guys,
Just need to unload - came back from 2nd shift ever at a new workplace and everyone at home is asleep
Basically I have trouble being myself - I become almost robotic and hypersensitive to my surroundings.
The first shift I was proud of myself in not being like this - what I'd consider "normal me" - a major feat as I don't think I've done that before ever
Anyway, everyone seems relaxed and nice, and when I'm feeling down, this makes me more selfconscious. I know that I'm brand new, but I feel negative inside and "social phobic me" steals my place. I act timid and have trouble participating, for no actual reason really. And once I'm in this negative place, I have extreme trouble getting out.
It's like cancer, eating away at my brain. I like who I am, but it is so so hard for me to show this person to everyone.
I've done a bit of research and see it comes down to self-esteem. I am proud of my achievements and happy with the type of person I am, yet my confidence is about as solid as a feather.
And now I am dreading work tomorrow, for no actual reason, as I believe I'll be timid me again... which ultimately I will unless I somehow magically coax myself otherwise.
Help please
Just need to unload - came back from 2nd shift ever at a new workplace and everyone at home is asleep
Basically I have trouble being myself - I become almost robotic and hypersensitive to my surroundings.
The first shift I was proud of myself in not being like this - what I'd consider "normal me" - a major feat as I don't think I've done that before ever
Anyway, everyone seems relaxed and nice, and when I'm feeling down, this makes me more selfconscious. I know that I'm brand new, but I feel negative inside and "social phobic me" steals my place. I act timid and have trouble participating, for no actual reason really. And once I'm in this negative place, I have extreme trouble getting out.
It's like cancer, eating away at my brain. I like who I am, but it is so so hard for me to show this person to everyone.
I've done a bit of research and see it comes down to self-esteem. I am proud of my achievements and happy with the type of person I am, yet my confidence is about as solid as a feather.
And now I am dreading work tomorrow, for no actual reason, as I believe I'll be timid me again... which ultimately I will unless I somehow magically coax myself otherwise.
Help please
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