I was directed by my doctor to check out this site. She has hipped me to the fact that I have S/A. Which makes sense of everything I go through. It really sucks cause I have to deal with the public all the time, and I'm not a really big people person, they freak me out. Yet its forced on me daily. Its gotten to the point where I've designed my business to be basically on auto pilot w/o me having to be there, good idea? No not really, its backfired on me, I'm under more pressure now to have to deal with people even more so. Interviews freak me out, not to mention if I have a TV spot I freeze. Sleep islike 2 hours a day, the rest of the time trying to think of pre arranged topics and conversations I can use when I have to talk to people, and fearing it. How to you guys cope? Or hide it? I'm tired of feeling awkward
So my first step is..?
- Thread starter ganache
- Start date
I wish it were practical to simply avoid people forever. That would be awesome.
Awareness is a good first step. You'll realize that unpleasant things you never thought much about aren't just how life is, but are part of the SA and can be made less painful and stressful with enough time and effort. Progress is not easy, but it's possible.
Welcome.
As far as specifics on how to deal or cope, what works varies from person to person. Personally, I stay away from meds. Others swear by them. Some people say CBT is the answer to everything, others say it didn't do anything for them.
Did your shrink mention this site in particular?
DeMarco
1
The more you do it and the " less anxious" you will feel. Also it's all about rejecting your negative though/thinking. Check out this site: The 4 Questions :: The Work of Byron Katie
Byron katie has a really cool techniques to reject those " negative thoughts" and she use to have agoraphobia, depression until she change her thinking.
Byron katie has a really cool techniques to reject those " negative thoughts" and she use to have agoraphobia, depression until she change her thinking.
Hey Ganache, welcome here! Have you read Wishcraft by Barbara Sher?
She said 'fake it until you make it' and that it's normal to 'freak out' before TV appearances or such.. in time, you get used to it...
Even people who now speak on TV every day had a rough time at first.. (some even cried, or worse, it may be good to read any biographies or interviews of TV people you admire...)
Putting your biz on 'auto-pilot' sounds good, cause then you can do other interesting things.. Just avoiding people or stressful situations isn't so good though..
Do you write down your pre arranged topics and conversations? It may help.
Journalling, EFTor TAT may help too..
Even Barbra Streisand and Sir Laurence Olivier and some other famous people had SA at a time in their life..
You are very brave to have interviews and do TV spots!!
It may help to imagine how relaxed you will be afterwards (this helps with tests/exams too..)
You can also write down 'worst case scenarios' and brainstorm ways around them then.. And then 'best case scenario', and realize it'll most likely be somewhere inbetween..
It may help to look at videos of some 'normal people' around your age etc. There are even 'TV coaches' that can help you with tips on TV appearances... And there are books about PR/marketing and such.. If your biz can afford it, maybe you can even hire a team or a consultant to help you? Or just team up with other biz owners also going through that, and exchange tips and experiences? Or can you hire a PR person? Or just pretend you are one? Sometimes pretending you are someone else whom you admire can help!
You can also 'practice' with a webcam/camera and then look at your videos and see what to improve, what was good.. (This may be really hard at first.. it can get easier with time) Remember it's the message that is important!!
She said 'fake it until you make it'
and that it's normal to 'freak out' before TV appearances or such.. in time, you get used to it...Even people who now speak on TV every day had a rough time at first.. (some even cried, or worse, it may be good to read any biographies or interviews of TV people you admire...)
Putting your biz on 'auto-pilot' sounds good, cause then you can do other interesting things.. Just avoiding people or stressful situations isn't so good though..
Do you write down your pre arranged topics and conversations? It may help.
Journalling, EFTor TAT may help too..
Even Barbra Streisand and Sir Laurence Olivier and some other famous people had SA at a time in their life..
You are very brave to have interviews and do TV spots!!
It may help to imagine how relaxed you will be afterwards (this helps with tests/exams too..)
You can also write down 'worst case scenarios' and brainstorm ways around them then.. And then 'best case scenario', and realize it'll most likely be somewhere inbetween..
It may help to look at videos of some 'normal people' around your age etc. There are even 'TV coaches' that can help you with tips on TV appearances... And there are books about PR/marketing and such.. If your biz can afford it, maybe you can even hire a team or a consultant to help you? Or just team up with other biz owners also going through that, and exchange tips and experiences? Or can you hire a PR person? Or just pretend you are one? Sometimes pretending you are someone else whom you admire can help!
You can also 'practice' with a webcam/camera and then look at your videos and see what to improve, what was good.. (This may be really hard at first.. it can get easier with time) Remember it's the message that is important!!