chris11
Well-known member
Yep, I failed a class for the first time in my entire academic carrear. Mind you, I have never really cared about my academic performance due to depression. Also, chronic insomnia really does not help. What is bothering be about this, however, is the fact that I'm actualy "really good" (according to my highschool math teachers) at math, but I failed calculus 1. They thought that because I was able to demonstrate my supposed 'talent' by doing mathematical activities that they wouldn't expect a high school student to be able to do.
Durring high school, I was able to get As in all the courses that I took that didn't require any studying (english, lit, psychology.. factoid courses); however, in the ones that did require studying, I scored Bs. When the anxiety, depression and insomnia and apathy were at their worst, durring the final days of grd 12, I scored 50% in a highschool calculus course. My teacher was predictably disapointed.
Grade 12 was when I decided to contact a therapist and psychiatrist. I was ' in therapy' (CBT) for about 5 months. After the first 2, I saw a psychatrist who prescribed me antidepressants. I was already on zopiclone for insomnia; although, that really didn't work very well for me.
I had a naive hope that when I went to university, all of 'the problems' would have been resolved as a result of the CBT (exercises and the sessions) and the drugs; further, I thought that if any amount of 'the problems' still existed, the drugs would enable me to become desensitized quickly. But that did not happen. I got depressed, which was not very suprising.
My so-called condition has pretty much domniated my entire life, and it is still holding its position of power--despite the fact that it was voted off the leadership board.
Additionaly, I've lost my former ability to create intresting things, whether they are drawings or short stories or poems. That may be a result of the drugs or the symptoms...
I suppose that I should make anouther apointment with my psychatrist; perhaps I'm on the wrong medication.
Now I'll have to repeat calculus 1, and this is a bad thing because it perturbs my schecguel..
Oh well.
........
I've seen other people's journalesque postings on this fourm, I thought that I would give it a try.
Durring high school, I was able to get As in all the courses that I took that didn't require any studying (english, lit, psychology.. factoid courses); however, in the ones that did require studying, I scored Bs. When the anxiety, depression and insomnia and apathy were at their worst, durring the final days of grd 12, I scored 50% in a highschool calculus course. My teacher was predictably disapointed.
Grade 12 was when I decided to contact a therapist and psychiatrist. I was ' in therapy' (CBT) for about 5 months. After the first 2, I saw a psychatrist who prescribed me antidepressants. I was already on zopiclone for insomnia; although, that really didn't work very well for me.
I had a naive hope that when I went to university, all of 'the problems' would have been resolved as a result of the CBT (exercises and the sessions) and the drugs; further, I thought that if any amount of 'the problems' still existed, the drugs would enable me to become desensitized quickly. But that did not happen. I got depressed, which was not very suprising.
My so-called condition has pretty much domniated my entire life, and it is still holding its position of power--despite the fact that it was voted off the leadership board.
Additionaly, I've lost my former ability to create intresting things, whether they are drawings or short stories or poems. That may be a result of the drugs or the symptoms...
I suppose that I should make anouther apointment with my psychatrist; perhaps I'm on the wrong medication.
Now I'll have to repeat calculus 1, and this is a bad thing because it perturbs my schecguel..
Oh well.
........
I've seen other people's journalesque postings on this fourm, I thought that I would give it a try.
.
