Sick of people

[Jo1991]

I even get tired of people online..........seriously!!!!!!

 

[Birdman]

Part of being a MATURE adult is being TOLERANT of people...not everybody is going to agree with you and please you. Sometimes you have to just suck it in and hold your head up and dont let them bother you. I hate my boss but i dont let it effect me because i have to suck up to her to be able to progress, but i really think she is a B***C
and want to kill her.

 

[Celephaïs]

I wouldn't say hate. Sometimes one on one I'm fine. But I often am a little weirded out when dealing with some folks. It's not so much the people I interact with but more a combination of the history of human behavior and groups enmasse. It's just alien to me and I spend a lot of time obsessing about it rather than living. :/

 

[thor01]

"I am the hate camel, you see, and it only takes a brief interlude with hummanity to fill my hump".-Bill Hicks
haha.

 

[NormanBates]

Too much people, too less people = headache. Kind of like alcohol.
I hate going to school cuz I'm the weird guy who walks around with that ugly scowl. And then the littlest meekest girls are the ones who come and taunt me. Ugh.

 

[waiting_to_live]

people

I can understand about hating people. IMO animals are more understanding then people are, they're not judgmental and they don't turn on others like people do. People make me sick..

I agree with you. I know this sounds really bad but when I hear on the news about natural disaters where hundreds of people are killed, I don't even flinch. I don't really care about human beings at all. In my opinion they only screw things up in the world. They are of no real use. Once again, this is only my personal opinion.

 

[lilcharlie]

It's horrible for me to say this but I'm avoiding people at work, and it feels great. I just feel like I get too smothered at work. I leave out from the back door so no one can see me. It's even better when I leave at odd times so no one really sees me. I start getting anxiety when I leave from the front door. People expect me to socialize with them, or they follow me and talk to me. I eat lunch by myself, and it feels great. I've even avoided some of my old friends by hanging out with other friends. But then I got sick of the second set of friends, so now I'm just gonna keep to myself and find some new hobbies ) I'm a mess. Already some of my old friends want to hang out, and I'm feeling a little bit of anxiety coming up. / Sometimes I just want to be alone, left alone; or sometimes I feel like I need new friends because I always get sick/tired of people. (?) Dear, dear me.

 

[lilcharlie]

I forgot to say, it hasn't even been long yet, and I've already made three enemies with people I used to talk to all the time. Oh well. If I always get sick of people, being around people, how the heck am I ever supposed to have kids and be married like society wants me to be?

 

[recluse]

I don't hate everyone i just hate arrogant people with big ego's. Some people seem to enjoy putting ''weaker'' people down just to make themselves feel better.

 

[Blau]

. ,,,^^,,, .

 

[Blau]

..............

 

[lilcharlie]

lol how you guys post youtube videos on here it's easy?

 

[nephatitus]

i just lower my expectations for people to levels so very low that i can cope with everyone equally and without bias

 

[Jay Cataldo]

The rampant negativity and self-hatred on this board astounds me.

 

[theangryone]

And people in general are really nice and friendly.

Not if you're socially unacceptable. When you're not, you see a whole other more hateful, judgmental side to people that you never expected. It's almost as if society is two faced-- nice and friendly to people who are considered acceptable; savage and hostile to people who aren't.

A great example are those social experiments in which someone goes incognito as someone of a different appearance. The person will visit establishments as "themselves", then go to the same establishments in a disguise. The first time someone goes out, everyone will behave friendly and accomodating as usual. The second time, the exact same people will suddenly be ruder, less receptive, avoid eye contact, or even rudely stare.

There was a local NYC radio host who wanted to try this experiment. She was an attractive, middle aged blonde woman who wanted to see what life was like as a Muslim. So first she went out to a Walmart "as herself" to buy something. Then she went to a store to ask for directions. Both times everyone was smiling, friendly, and accomodating, especially the store clerk who she asked directions from.

Then she went out dressed in Muslim garb and that's when all hell broke loose. There were rude stares, whispers, and comments by people when she went out in public. People would avoid eye contact. But what was really shocking was what happened when she went back to the same store where she had asked directions. When she had first asked the guy directions, he was nothing but polite and went beyond the call of duty to help her. "Oh, sure... you go down here, you go up there... etc..."

But then when she asked as "the Muslim", he was like "I dunno." (Keep in mind, she was asking for the SAME DIRECTIONS she had asked him just two days before.) Naturally, she was upset that this guy was bold-faced lying to her so she said she thought he knew. He suddenly grew hostile and insisted that he "had no idea." Then one thing led to another and before you knew it, this "nice, polite man" was suddenly yelling at her, throwing insults at her, and telling her that she needed to ride back to her country on her camel.

Now before you go, "Oh, he was just a bigot..." you're missing the point of all this. The guy "may" have indeed been a "bigot", but his hostility was part of a general pattern of how people on the whole was treating the radio host when she dressed up as a Muslim woman and pointed to a "two-facedness" in the way society treats people. As an attractive blonde woman, she would have NEVER seen this side of the guy who was acting so rudely or seen the side of people that points and stares and whispers comments under their breath. But as a Muslim woman or a fat person or a disabled person or as someone else who is or has something that society finds unacceptable, this would have been the only side she would see to them.

So are people generally nice and friendly? Depends on who you ask.

 

[Jay Cataldo]

As an attractive blonde woman, she would have NEVER seen this side of the guy who was acting so rudely or seen the side of people that points and stares and whispers comments under their breath. But as a Muslim woman or a fat person or a disabled person or as someone else who is or has something that society finds unacceptable, this would have been the only side she would see to them.

It's not always this black and white. Not all people are rude to muslims, the overweight, the disabled, etc. but some are. That's just the way the world is. Not everyone is judgmental but most are. You're being judgmental yourself by assuming that all people suck based on this one experiment and a few of your personal experiences. When you look at the world through a pair of dirty glasses, all you'll see is dirt.

Isn't assuming that a total stranger will be nasty and cruel the same as assuming negative things about a woman based on her religious background or ethnicity? I can totally see why the results of this experiment anger you, but I hope you understand that your attitude is perpetuating the very behavior you are ranting about.

And while the results of this experiment seem a little far-fetched and distorted, I can totally see something like this happening... especially in the months following 9-11 when the entire country became fearful of Muslims. Always be mindful of the context.

 

[theangryone]

Dear Jay Cataldo,

Before patronizingly informing people about how they're "seeing dirt" because they are wearing glasses, kindly buy a pair of prescription glasses in order to properly read what someone is saying before responding.

I was never "ranting" and I never said that "all people suck"-- that's just a crude, oversimplistic interpretation of what I wrote.

And whatever conclusions you erroneously assume I have drawn about how people behave were not based on *just* "my personal experiences" or "one experiment." The fact that you'd assume that I would be such a simpleton to draw conclusions solely based on a "few personal experiences" and "one" social study shows how low of an opinion you have of the intelligence of the people who post here.

 

[Lea]

I´ve read about some experiment when the same girl first time made herself very atractive, second time very ugly. She pretended to have accident on the street. The reactions of people were much better in the first case, they offered her help with smile etc. In the second case the majority of people were unhelpful, didn´t smile or pretended they haven´t notice her and her accident.

 

[Jay Cataldo]

Dear Jay Cataldo,

Before patronizingly informing people about how they're "seeing dirt" because they are wearing glasses, kindly buy a pair of prescription glasses in order to properly read what someone is saying before responding.

To clarify, "dirty glasses" is a metaphor which describes the effects one's beliefs have on the way they view the world. Freestyle Monster was shocked to hear someone say that all people are cruel and nasty because he believes the opposite... so his reticular activation system is constantly searching out evidence to back it up. And because he expects to be treated well, people are nice and friendly to him, which gives him more evidence to back up his belief.

It works the same way if you believe that everyone is a jerk who will treat you like crap... you'll be putting off a negative vibe that will result in a higher probability of being treated unfairly.

People have a tendency to walk through the doors of your expectations. If you believe the world to be a horrible place, you'll be right. If you expect people to treat you as if you're "unacceptable", they will. You can argue against this premise as much as you want, but it doesn't make it any less true. Change your frame of mind as an experiment and go test it out for yourself.

I was never "ranting" and I never said that "all people suck"-- that's just a crude, oversimplistic interpretation of what I wrote.

And whatever conclusions you erroneously assume I have drawn about how people behave were not based on "my personal experiments" or "one experiment." The fact that you'd assume that I would be such a simpleton to draw conclusions solely based on a "few personal experiences" and "one" social study shows how low of an opinion you have of the intelligence of the people who post here.

Nobody said you were ranting and nobody assumes you're a "simpleton." And how does my attempt to stop you from focusing on negativity translate to having "a low opinion of the intelligence of people who post here"? Quite a logical leap, wouldn't you say?

You disagreed with the statement: "people are inherently nice and friendly" and tried to use the evidence of a supposed experiment, the results of which may or may not have been manipulated (most "experiments" are designed to back up the researcher's agenda and are far from objective), to back up a negative belief that is doing nothing good for you or anyone else on this board.

I simply pointed out the danger of a person doing this, no matter how intelligent they might be (some of the most intelligent people on the planet are miserable cynics who focus on the bad in everything). If you took what I said as a personal attack, I apologize, because I was addressing your statement, not you as a person.

If you haven't noticed, most of the posters on this board are consumed with hate, rage, loneliness, depression, etc. and are constantly dumping their negativity out in plain view. This thread for example, is about "hating" others which is one of the least constructive threads possible, yet only one person tried to change this thread's focus and had his attempt quickly cut short.

We all know that almost everyone on the planet can be nice and friendly at times as well as cruel, hateful and judgmental and we don't need an experimenter to prove this. But keeping everyone focused on their anger and hatred, however, does NOTHING good for this board. If everyone simply dropped their dirty glasses and started focusing on positivity while expecting the good qualities in others to shine, 70% of their problems would vanish almost overnight.

I'll conclude this by saying that I'm not here to make friends. I'm here to help the people who want to be helped by leading them to believe that, just maybe, they have more control over their SA then they might think and that there really is a light at the end of the tunnel. Unfortunately, they'll never see the light until they stop dwelling in the darkness.

And if my viewpoints make you angry, then you don't have to respond or even read them. Just realize that "my argument is not with you."

 

[Jay Cataldo]

I´ve read about some experiment when the same girl first time made herself very atractive, second time very ugly. She pretended to have accident on the street. The reactions of people were much better in the first case, they offered her help with smile etc. In the second case the majority of people were unhelpful, didn´t smile or pretended they haven´t notice her and her accident.

This is because attractive people are considered to have more clout in our society and usually get preferential treatment in almost all areas. Read Cialdini's classic text, "Influence: The Psychology Of Persuasion" for more on this.