Saraswati
Active member
I've been having these weird self-harm thoughts for about three months now and even though I started medication 2 months ago I doesn't seem it's helping me get rid of them. If anything, they seem to be more frequent.
I did self-harm a couple of times. Nothing serious up until now though. Just minor cuts on my arm.
I think the desire to do it is becoming more and more powerful with every passing day. As I said, I self-harmed a few times - when something really bad happened and I was at my worst. But now thoughts about self-harm are always there in the back of my mind.... Not only that they are more frequent (even when I am feeling okay I can get the urge), they are also becoming more violent.
Every day I think about punching into a wall, kicking into something until at least a bone or two break. I think about covering my entire arm with cuts. I see this images of me punching into a driving bus so hard that my arm would get twisted and that a bone would pierce through my skin. Or cut into my leg so hard it would fall off....
This images scare me a bit. I don't think I would be capable of doing those things nor do I have such a strong desire to do them. They are alsonot that vivid.
It's just that they are always there...
How do I know I won't do something like this if my condition gets worse?
Is this only due to my desire for self-harm getting stronger or could it be because of something else?
Does anyone have any experience with this?
I did self-harm a couple of times. Nothing serious up until now though. Just minor cuts on my arm.
I think the desire to do it is becoming more and more powerful with every passing day. As I said, I self-harmed a few times - when something really bad happened and I was at my worst. But now thoughts about self-harm are always there in the back of my mind.... Not only that they are more frequent (even when I am feeling okay I can get the urge), they are also becoming more violent.
Every day I think about punching into a wall, kicking into something until at least a bone or two break. I think about covering my entire arm with cuts. I see this images of me punching into a driving bus so hard that my arm would get twisted and that a bone would pierce through my skin. Or cut into my leg so hard it would fall off....
This images scare me a bit. I don't think I would be capable of doing those things nor do I have such a strong desire to do them. They are alsonot that vivid.
It's just that they are always there...
How do I know I won't do something like this if my condition gets worse?
Is this only due to my desire for self-harm getting stronger or could it be because of something else?
Does anyone have any experience with this?