Sidvicious912
New member
Ok, I have 2 basic ideas to present here and would appreciate your feedback on either of them. I have been thinking about these theories for a couple months after I read a post on here that inspired me I CURED MYSELF, NO DRUGS, NO LIE, PLEASE READ!!!!!!! - SocialPhobiaWorld.com
The first thing I want to talk about is the anxiety self image that we have of ourselves when we are in social situations. I believe that in our subconscious minds every person that has social anxiety has this distorted image of themselves that is weird/anxious/undesirable and because of this anxious self image we are afraid that others will be able to see it. I know you may not believe this image exists, but I think there is too much evidence to completely discount it. We are afraid on a subconscious level that others will be able to see this weird anxiety person in us and therefore all these irrational thoughts that we have make sense to us.
A fear of eye contact is easily explained by our brain telling us to “look out” or someone might see our anxiety person; or why do I focus so much on what others are thinking of me even when I am talking to them, once again we are afraid they will see this anxiety person. Why do we feel inferior to others? Well, once again, since this weird/anxious/non-social person is an image that indwells deeply in our subconscious minds and we listen and act on the thoughts of this person all the time, it is normal to feel inferior to others because this image is a part of us and makes us feel this way. This distorted image really is inferior to our real selves and everyone else, but that doesn't mean that we are inferior. Why do I feel like people are watching and judging me and why the hell do I feel this way? Well to answer this question I would need to explain the 3rd person perspective and how it is deeply connected with this anxiety image. (explained later).
My main point in telling you all this is that hopefully you will be able to identify this anxiety person as not a part of the real you. We have fed this image over and over, well actually the anxiety image feeds itself over and over. You are not this anxiety/weirdo person because it is an overexaggerated lie that no one else can see, they will only notice that you are quiet or shy, there is no way they can see this horrible anxiety person that your mind has created and reinforced.
So the question has to be “How do I get rid of this weird/anxiety/non-social image of myself that dwells in my subconscious?”
You must become aware of it. Just walk into a feared social situation and you will notice that it awakens all kinds of thoughts that help it grow and thrive in your mind. By recognizing where these thoughts are coming from and what they are it will be much easier for you to wipe them out and finally be yourself.
Second you must realize that all your anxiety flows from this character. When you are really super anxious you are almost fully aligned with this weirdo/anxiety image that rests in your subconscious. Notice that you have become this image. You must try and see your real self. You will only overcome social anxiety when you become totally comfortable in who you are, NOT WHEN YOU BECOME SOME COOL SOCIAL GUY WITH A GIRLFRIEND. You must be able to be yourself completely separate of this lying anxiety person that is also in your mind. The deeper you are in your social anxiety the more you have lost who the real you is, and unfortunately, the more this creature will thrive. In order to wipe this anxiety image out you have got to stop it from fueling itself.
It needs fuel to stay alive and it does it all by itself if you let it. If you are not paying attention to your thoughts, all you will notice are the feelings of anxiety and depression that your anxiety character leaves behind. One of the worst things about it is that this anxiety image looks just like you and it is hard to tell which thoughts are from it and which are your own thoughts.
One way in which this anxiety self image stays alive (and grows) is through the use of the third person perspective. Read the post I mentioned earlier if you want more info about this perspective. The third person perspective is usually happens in feared situations . What happens is that our mind goes outside of our 1st person perspective in order to find thoughts that support this weirdo anxiety image. Watch for it and I bet you do it too. We constantly see ourselves from the viewpoint of other people and lose our own thoughts. This helps to explain why its so hard for us to carry on a conversation. There is more going on than just being anxious.
We are looking at ourselves from the viewpoints of others and making up all these stories that they might be thinking about us. It is very difficult to stop these thoughts because they come straight from the weirdo/anxiety persona headquarters. Our anxiety persona likes using these thoughts to fuel itself because it can basically make things up since it is coming from the outside world where almost anything is possible. Yes, people could be thinking these thoughts, but I mean really? I mean the thoughts and feeling seem logical from our point of view, but only because we are seeing it side by side with our anxiety character in the 3rd person. Let me explain that better, when we go into the third person, we see ourselves as this anxious person because we are looking at ourselves from the outside and we are thoughts are filtered through this anxiety lens.
Ok that last paragraph seemed weird but guess what, social anxiety is weird, how else could a guy as good looking as I am not be able to get a girlfriend, or even ask them on dates. According to this line of reason my mind is protecting me because it thinks this anxiety persona in my head is real and that they will see it and run.
Well anyway, let me know if any of this mumbojumbo is useful. I know it has helped me. I am now able to ride my bike on college campus without feeling anxious! Just a few thoughts from that anxiety persona trying to get out. I apologize if I explained this badly because I am very visual and suck at writing. So ask questions please. And read this post: I CURED MYSELF, NO DRUGS, NO LIE, PLEASE READ!!!!!!! - SocialPhobiaWorld.com it is one of three post of a guy that cured himself by being himself and wiping out the third person perspective, which is a huge part of our disorder.
The first thing I want to talk about is the anxiety self image that we have of ourselves when we are in social situations. I believe that in our subconscious minds every person that has social anxiety has this distorted image of themselves that is weird/anxious/undesirable and because of this anxious self image we are afraid that others will be able to see it. I know you may not believe this image exists, but I think there is too much evidence to completely discount it. We are afraid on a subconscious level that others will be able to see this weird anxiety person in us and therefore all these irrational thoughts that we have make sense to us.
A fear of eye contact is easily explained by our brain telling us to “look out” or someone might see our anxiety person; or why do I focus so much on what others are thinking of me even when I am talking to them, once again we are afraid they will see this anxiety person. Why do we feel inferior to others? Well, once again, since this weird/anxious/non-social person is an image that indwells deeply in our subconscious minds and we listen and act on the thoughts of this person all the time, it is normal to feel inferior to others because this image is a part of us and makes us feel this way. This distorted image really is inferior to our real selves and everyone else, but that doesn't mean that we are inferior. Why do I feel like people are watching and judging me and why the hell do I feel this way? Well to answer this question I would need to explain the 3rd person perspective and how it is deeply connected with this anxiety image. (explained later).
My main point in telling you all this is that hopefully you will be able to identify this anxiety person as not a part of the real you. We have fed this image over and over, well actually the anxiety image feeds itself over and over. You are not this anxiety/weirdo person because it is an overexaggerated lie that no one else can see, they will only notice that you are quiet or shy, there is no way they can see this horrible anxiety person that your mind has created and reinforced.
So the question has to be “How do I get rid of this weird/anxiety/non-social image of myself that dwells in my subconscious?”
You must become aware of it. Just walk into a feared social situation and you will notice that it awakens all kinds of thoughts that help it grow and thrive in your mind. By recognizing where these thoughts are coming from and what they are it will be much easier for you to wipe them out and finally be yourself.
Second you must realize that all your anxiety flows from this character. When you are really super anxious you are almost fully aligned with this weirdo/anxiety image that rests in your subconscious. Notice that you have become this image. You must try and see your real self. You will only overcome social anxiety when you become totally comfortable in who you are, NOT WHEN YOU BECOME SOME COOL SOCIAL GUY WITH A GIRLFRIEND. You must be able to be yourself completely separate of this lying anxiety person that is also in your mind. The deeper you are in your social anxiety the more you have lost who the real you is, and unfortunately, the more this creature will thrive. In order to wipe this anxiety image out you have got to stop it from fueling itself.
It needs fuel to stay alive and it does it all by itself if you let it. If you are not paying attention to your thoughts, all you will notice are the feelings of anxiety and depression that your anxiety character leaves behind. One of the worst things about it is that this anxiety image looks just like you and it is hard to tell which thoughts are from it and which are your own thoughts.
One way in which this anxiety self image stays alive (and grows) is through the use of the third person perspective. Read the post I mentioned earlier if you want more info about this perspective. The third person perspective is usually happens in feared situations . What happens is that our mind goes outside of our 1st person perspective in order to find thoughts that support this weirdo anxiety image. Watch for it and I bet you do it too. We constantly see ourselves from the viewpoint of other people and lose our own thoughts. This helps to explain why its so hard for us to carry on a conversation. There is more going on than just being anxious.
We are looking at ourselves from the viewpoints of others and making up all these stories that they might be thinking about us. It is very difficult to stop these thoughts because they come straight from the weirdo/anxiety persona headquarters. Our anxiety persona likes using these thoughts to fuel itself because it can basically make things up since it is coming from the outside world where almost anything is possible. Yes, people could be thinking these thoughts, but I mean really? I mean the thoughts and feeling seem logical from our point of view, but only because we are seeing it side by side with our anxiety character in the 3rd person. Let me explain that better, when we go into the third person, we see ourselves as this anxious person because we are looking at ourselves from the outside and we are thoughts are filtered through this anxiety lens.
Ok that last paragraph seemed weird but guess what, social anxiety is weird, how else could a guy as good looking as I am not be able to get a girlfriend, or even ask them on dates. According to this line of reason my mind is protecting me because it thinks this anxiety persona in my head is real and that they will see it and run.
Well anyway, let me know if any of this mumbojumbo is useful. I know it has helped me. I am now able to ride my bike on college campus without feeling anxious! Just a few thoughts from that anxiety persona trying to get out. I apologize if I explained this badly because I am very visual and suck at writing. So ask questions please. And read this post: I CURED MYSELF, NO DRUGS, NO LIE, PLEASE READ!!!!!!! - SocialPhobiaWorld.com it is one of three post of a guy that cured himself by being himself and wiping out the third person perspective, which is a huge part of our disorder.
