Remus's moan

[Remus]

ever wished you'd not bothered helping someone?

My mate Gav is hooked on coke and speed, weve been trying to wean him off it for months, where he lives dosnt help as both his mum and his brother are alcoholics, Gav and his mum are so ill ,the other brother is trying to get them both sectioned (I think so he can get the house).Gav tried to take his own life a week back, so I've been worried.

I thought of an idea to get Gav out of the house for a couple of days, go camping with me, have a nice respite, anyway when I got there it was kicking off royally, his mum was having a drunken rant in the back room, all on her own and shouting and bawling.

I went in to calm her down, saying I would be taking Gav away for a few days, get him out of her hair, then she ranted at me "why dont you ever do anything for me, its all Gav Gav Gav", then as alcoholics do went on to say vicious shit about me (anyone who knows one will know what thats like)

anyway....all this heat escalated and I was supposed to be back at home for ten to make a couple of phone calls (and they were very important phone calls so i'm annoyed), instead Gavs going mental, I'm trying to stop him wrecking the house and harming himself, also doing the same with his mum, I told him to come with me and I'd put him up for a few days but he wouldnt, was waiting for his "package" to be dropped off, said its the only cure for this crap he goes through.

I dont know why I bother sometimes :?

he's gonna go camping anyway, hope I can at least try and get through to him

sorry guys, moan over!

 

[Boundless]

Hey man its nice that you care so much,and dont take it personaly drugs and booze,very powerfull.At least you are trying and persisting rather than giving up,i hope this trip goes well for you and your friend as everyone deserve more than the life hes living :|

 

[redlady]

Moan is to catharsis as catharsis is to good mental health - Moan away gracious moderator
I have been around people who have just gone 'nuts' ( for want of a better word ) where something inside them just snaps - and it is completely overwhelming. I feel so helpless in those situations - all you want to do is just make everything better, but you can't - well with the people that i have been around you can't.
I know it doesn't help to say it and you will still feel the pain anyway of having to watch your friend go through that - but there is nothing you can do until they have made the decision to want help and want to change - i hope that is in him and that you do get through to him when you are alone with him.

 

[blubs]

empathy seems to be a big part of your nature...and when you genuinely want to help someone its frustrating when you can't .
Just don't wear yourself out...there's only so much support you can give to other people :wink:
x

 

[Remus]

nowt like a good moan to make you feel better, thx guys

I'll let you know how things develop

 

[Chilling__Echo]

this whole *moan* is exactly what i like about you Remus. you lend in a hand whenever you can, it's just this time they're all too messed up on their addictions running from whatever it is they're running from, they can't see the generous gesture you're giving to them. Gav sounds like a good pal to you and i hope he knows what a good friend you are to him. hang in there, it's your judgement call and so far your judgement hasn't steered you wrong. you've done your part.

we need more people like you in the world

 

[pitkreet]

I'm getting a mental picture of the campsite......Remus sat round the campfire, toasting his marshmallows, Gav tied to a pole in the middle of the fire.

 

[Remus]

"you heard the man tubbs....get undressed" :lol:

(LOG joke for those who think I'm nuts and dont get it)

 

[Remus]

see here :

http://www.lofg.com/character_profile.php?profile_id=34

:lol:

 

[Danfalc]

Remus

Sorry to hear about the situation with your mate.It must be pretty rough for you seeing him do that to himself.I understand the point redlady made about her saying basicaly he needs to want to help himself otherwise its not going to happen.But it really isnt as simple as that, im also struggling with drug addiction myself, and when you have shit going on in your life,your own willpower isnt enough to kick whatever your addicted to.Youre doing the right thing in trying to get him away from the enviroment he is in, because as long as he is in that enviroment he wont be able to say no to the drugs and the cycle will continue.I know you have your own life and problems to deal with, but if you manage to get him out of the enviroment he is in, thats the thing which has a chance of breaking his addiction.Hope you sucseed in helping him remus i wish you the best of luck, hes lucky to have a mate who cares enough to try and help him.