Rant about my night out

[KiaKaha]

I thought I would try to socialize, and get out a bit more so I went to a quiz night at my course. As soon as I got there I felt out of place. I made a dumb joke and got the usual eye roll of inferiority directed at me. I can tell these people cant stand me. Like I am an annoying little bug that just gets on everyones nerves. After that i started getting shy and started to become visibly uncomfortable. I became quiet but could still talk but I could sense I was starting to make people feel uncomfortable...even when I said goodbye no one said anything to me....I am not wierd or a creep, I am just..a little bit shy sometimes...is that really such a crime?

I get the feeling that there is "something" about me that people just dont like. I dont get it. It must be my appearance. I cant think of anything else. I feel like I am never going to fit in in the world. And I am tired of the only people who listen to me or understand me are the ones I meet online. I have been debating whether or not I should stay at my course or if I should go. They obviously cant wait to see the back of me...then I suppose I will go somewhere else where everyone makes it blatantly obvious they think I am prick...maybe i am a prick and dont know it.

I think I am about to cry........

anyway, sorry...

No one needs to respond. Just sharing makes me feel like someone cares.

 

[kihira]

Good on you for having a go. It may be that you are over reacting to situations > feeling bad > making it worse.That's what I used to do. You can't blame your looks as you seem to be above average their. You're not a prick but you may come across as such - if so then a bit of work on interpersonal skills will work wonders.
Hope that helps - bit tired tonight

 

[THE-INTROVERT]

i feel the exact same mate i feel people look down on me because im quiet and i know im not being paranoid its the truth and you can sense it among people i can sense people also think im a pushover becuase im quiet far from the truth deep down but keep your head up high mate why let people put you down your anxious so what if people are going to look down on you for being then screw them ive had nights like you were i have been siting in a cornor on my own while every one elde i really have nothing in common with anyone thats half my problem

 

[Anti Matter]

Don't worry your not alone, I feel like this most times I go out.

 

[Emma03]

I am not wierd or a creep, I am just..a little bit shy sometimes...is that really such a crime?

I know how this feels. I think this is why my shyness turned into anxiety. I was always quiet, and my whole life everybody has more or less said "what's wrong with you?" And this made me feel so ashamed, and I believed that there was something wrong with me. I'm trying to get over the fact that it really is okay to be quiet, but it is hard to shake years of being told otherwise.

 

[Emma03]

I'm trying to get over the fact that it really is okay to be quiet, but it is hard to shake years of being told otherwise.

I don't think this last part made sense...I meant to say that I'm trying to accept that it's okay to be quiet... haha

 

[vanfuggle]

I used to get that all the time. I'm 44 now, but in high school and college people really hated me and said I was stuck up. I wasn't - I had social anxiety. I hope you stay in school, you know these people won't mean anything once you're out in the world.