Paranoia as a learning tool for SA

[hexagon_sun]

I know... I know... What a ridiculous premise; that paranoia can be productive!! Well... it can! You first must understand what paranoia is…

Paranoia: a tendency on the part of an individual or group toward excessive or irrational (less than rational) suspiciousness and distrustfulness of others -Merriam Webster’s Dictionary

What that means is you HAVE cause for suspicion which may have been overstated, blown out of proportion, misinterpreted.

The reason I added "less than rational" is to suggest that paranoia is a spectrum rather than simply black or white (paranoid or not). There are those who are irrationally or perhaps clinically paranoid (One flew over the coo-coo's nest) and those who are justifiably paranoid (former intelligence agents for example). Being "paranoid" or if you prefer the less pejorative term "vigilant" can been seen as a skill that can be refined for a greater level of discernment; eliminating future false positives.

The only way, short of going through "spy training" to acquire this knowledge is through experience. Learning through experience necessitates a number of failures along the way. Failure should be expected and are par for the course provided that one learns lessons from those failures.

Expect to fail SMALL now, so you don't fail BIG in the future...
If there are those who are not willing to forgive you when you admit making a mistake, I promise you, you DO NOT want to associate with these people ANYWAY!

An unfortunate, and infrequently addressed reality of dealing with SA is elimintating ties with people that damage our self-esteem on a consistent basis. You may not even realize it is going on... Family members, friends, bosses coworkers. You don't need to put up with it. Somewhere, there is a place suited for each one of us. Keep thinking that!

 

[mikebird]

I call it fear of fear

 

[laure15]

Thanks for posting this. I never thought of paranoia as a spectrum. Over the years, I was hypervigilant in social situations which I thought was a bad thing. So I tried to limit my awareness of the surroundings. When I hear people talking bad about me, I pretended not to hear and continued smiling. I even tried to wave at those people but they didn’t reciprocate. Instead, they told other people to keep ignoring me. I wonder if I will be happier if I am ignorant of what people thought about me. After all, ignorance is bliss.

But after reading your post, I realize paranoia could be healthy, a tool for survival. It’s what spies use after all, and they’re experts at adaptation. Awareness is a good thing, even though it can bring sadness and pain. Truth is liberating but can be painful. I should be glad that I am vigilant.

 

[hexagon_sun]

Thanks for posting this. I never thought of paranoia as a spectrum. Over the years, I was hypervigilant in social situations which I thought was a bad thing. So I tried to limit my awareness of the surroundings. When I hear people talking bad about me, I pretended not to hear and continued smiling. I even tried to wave at those people but they didn’t reciprocate. Instead, they told other people to keep ignoring me. I wonder if I will be happier if I am ignorant of what people thought about me. After all, ignorance is bliss.

But after reading your post, I realize paranoia could be healthy, a tool for survival. It’s what spies use after all, and they’re experts at adaptation. Awareness is a good thing, even though it can bring sadness and pain. Truth is liberating but can be painful. I should be glad that I am vigilant.

The sadness you may feel in knowing unpleasant truths (even about yourself) is fleeting and short lived. It is not the ceiling of your experiences. There is more above. It is merely a threshold (an envelope) to surpass. Keep going. Don't stop. Cry... get angry. But keep going. Learn to overcome self doubt. Be bold. Be strange. Be yourself! They cannot stop you. There is a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow...

 

[rosewood]

Thanks for posting this. I never thought of paranoia as a spectrum. Over the years, I was hypervigilant in social situations which I thought was a bad thing. So I tried to limit my awareness of the surroundings. When I hear people talking bad about me, I pretended not to hear and continued smiling. I even tried to wave at those people but they didn’t reciprocate. Instead, they told other people to keep ignoring me. I wonder if I will be happier if I am ignorant of what people thought about me. After all, ignorance is bliss.

But after reading your post, I realize paranoia could be healthy, a tool for survival. It’s what spies use after all, and they’re experts at adaptation. Awareness is a good thing, even though it can bring sadness and pain. Truth is liberating but can be painful. I should be glad that I am vigilant.

that sounds EXACTLY like me. i just ignored and ignored and kept on like nothing was ever wrong with the situation. i have been smiling at all of those people who refused to acknowledge me or even give me the slightest eye contact and head nod in passing, and these people who did this were not 2 feet from me. i was brought up to be polite no matter what,no matter how awful or excruciating the other persons behavior was, just keep on smiling, but maybe i should stop that. why waste my energy on people who cant manage the tiniest bit of manners?
:thumbup:

 

[laure15]

The sadness you may feel in knowing unpleasant truths (even about yourself) is fleeting and short lived. It is not the ceiling of your experiences. There is more above. It is merely a threshold (an envelope) to surpass. Keep going. Don't stop. Cry... get angry. But keep going. Learn to overcome self doubt. Be bold. Be strange. Be yourself! They cannot stop you. There is a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow...

Great advice! I will keep this in mind.

that sounds EXACTLY like me. i just ignored and ignored and kept on like nothing was ever wrong with the situation. i have been smiling at all of those people who refused to acknowledge me or even give me the slightest eye contact and head nod in passing, and these people who did this were not 2 feet from me. i was brought up to be polite no matter what,no matter how awful or excruciating the other persons behavior was, just keep on smiling, but maybe i should stop that. why waste my energy on people who cant manage the tiniest bit of manners?
:thumbup:

I was brought up to be polite too. My dad even taught me to be an *ss kisser. He was the one who told me to turn the other cheek when someone attacks me and just keep smiling. It's very draining to always be positive. I agree, we shouldn't waste our energy on negative people.