Online Relationships!!

[Kat]

Has anyone had any good or bad experiences with internet dating? What are your views on this? They will be greatly appreciated.

I’ve always seen an online relationship as a bit of a joke (no offence to you online daters out there); so far apart, never even seen each other, people act differently online then they do in real life, etc. I’ll tell you a bit about my situation. I’m not actually dating this guy but we are chatting on a regular basis. I have a lot in common with him. I like him as a person and would no doubt date him. But the whole online dating thing, I never really got into it. I have been talking to him for three months now and he is getting feelings for me. I don't want to hurt his feelings but I just don't see how it will work out dating someone online. Plus the other problem is he is from America and I’m from Australia.

Help Please.
Thanks!!

:lol:

 

[tommydog]

lol kat

:lol:

you cant "date" someone online ofcourse its not gonna work out !! :lol:

ok let me clarify my opinoin ... and also my experience.

Theres nothing wrong with meeting someone online. Theres nothing wrong with getting to know someone a bit online and chatting away or whatever. But then, if you feel its time or your interested, then you can meet, then you can worry about getting feelings for each other and blah blah. Meeting point only, keep it light, trust me. Meeting, and talking online, is totally different regardless of how good you get along on the computer. In my opinion attraction is all about vibe and chemistry, and you can only feel that in person.

The thing about him living in america, well, you know, its not impossible, people move to be with thier partners, im doing it tomorrow lol, not that far, but nonetheless :lol:

But yer maybe be a bit realistic, you not gonna fly to america to have a coffee and meet the bloke, and then if you dont like him fly back again ! keep him as a friend only, tell him to chill and lighten up with the feelings thing.

If you want to meet someone online, do it in australia, even better, within your own state.

 

[Remus]

I had a online relationship years ago that turn into a real relationship, mind you it only developed into a real one once we met up, wde were together 3 years and it went quoite well.

I had another one last year that didnt go so well.

so I guess it varies, you have to meet the person though to know wether it will work. The fantasy of what they are like is often diffferent than the reality

 

[Hamble]

I met my gf online 5 years ago, and it was the best thing that could have happened to me.
Even tho I'm a very distrusting person and have a habit of not letting anyone get close to me whatsoever, I let this one in.

We started off just chatting and joking around, there was never any suggestion that anything but a bit of banter and a penpal style friendship would come of it, because we both thought online relationships were a joke. Plus the fact shes 11 years older than myself and not attracted to younger people, and she was completely not my type either (i.e, loud confident, whirlwind social life, masses of life experience, in which other words scared me shitless)

However, our lighthearted chats turned into lengthly and serious conversations about everything, we never stopped talking (online). After about a year I finally allowed her to call me. She knew i had issues with phones etc and I didnt actually pick up the phone until the tenth attempt of her ringing but she was so patient and understanding, and the conversation flowed just the same as it did online. My confidence grew as i began to learn she was just as nervous as me, despite her personality and lack of SA. A year later we met, and after a shacky 1st meet up, we met again, and it was as if we'd known eachother all our lives.

Now I've moved 200 plus miles to live with her and 5 years on were still together and very much in love. And my SA is improving day by day.

Net rels do work, but only if you meet the right one. When you do, you just know, the same goes when you meet someoine in real life. You just have to be a good judge of character and be a bit supicious and dont rush into meeting. Its a fantastic way to get to know one another without all the embarressment of awkward silences etc

 

[Anonymous]

Hi, Kat. I'm a big fan of on-line dating. I think it's a great way to meet people (even though I'm still single ). For me, the more people I meet the more I understand about myself and others. But on-line relationships can only go so far...I mean words are very important but we need chemistry and intimacy, too. I think you two should meet (when you feel it's right)...it's the only way to know if it's meant to be and you don't want to have any regrets (I know I have far too many of those). Just don't put too much pressuse on yourself or on the situation. I think the most important thing is to express yourself and be honest with this person...have a plan in place so you'll be prepared if it doesn't work out. I believe that every event in our lives gives us valuable life experience and wisdom...and we shouldn't avoid these opportunites when they present themselves.

Anyway, this is my story: a few years ago I met a young woman from another country on-line and we got along amazingly well. But when we finally met up nothing of a romantic nature developed. We were both honest with one another...no harm...no foul. I'm glad that we met, though, it was a great experience and I wouldn't have changed it for anything.

 

[Melodyz]

I met someone online and am currently in a relationship with him. He is wonderful. He's so understanding and patient. We met on a board and only started talking through PMs and then worked up to talking on AIM and then on the phone. We haven't met in person yet but are planning on it soon. I have been in other relationships in the past and this is my first experience being in love with someone I haven't met. But the love I feel for him is even stronger than what I've ever felt for anyone else. I remember one time saying to him that I wish I had met him in person first. And he stated then we would have never met because he doesn't do well meeting people in person and meeting this way was his only hope of finding someone. I thought about that and realized if I had not been willing to give this a try I would have missed out on the greatest thing that ever happened in my life.

 

[Remus]

aww thats so sweet and romantic worrydoll, thats how I like relationships to happen

 

[Melodyz]

We're planning to meet as soon as he's off break and his midterms are over. In about a couple of weeks. I am also insecure and am scared to death about meeting up. But I was also scared to talk on the phone for the first time and he was so patient and understanding, he took complete control of the whole situation and kept talking until I was able to calm down and talk too (which I know was hard for him to do). He's promised to be the same way when we meet in person. He said we'll do things at my pace. So I'm holding my breath 2 weeks isn't that long. I am so excited and nervous at the same time.

I do agree with you worrydoll that meeting this way was a great way to get to know each other. We've sure done alot more talking than I ever have in any of my other relationships and I think that's great.

 

[Fredscars]

i had a 'sort of' relationship online..moved on to phone calls and all that. I was having a bad time with SP, etc etc...this guy was the only one who ever made me feel wnated..so i just fell onto him, he taught me an awful lot, about guys, growing up etc..but i regret it. its not like anyhting happened..i never met him..but i told him an awful lot of stuff, he told me a lot of stuff i now can see was a complete lie, i just fell into his trapp, i was one of his many 'fans' all of which he played with, made them feel like they meant something. Now im suspicious of guys online. People can play with you so badly, and youre too taken to see that at the time.

 

[Remus]

I know what you mean fred, I just recently had the piss took out of me the same way by a 'normal', no wonder I just dont feel up to chatting to anyone anymore, thing is I'm naturally suspicious anywho, I was still conned though.