pandamonium77
Well-known member
Hi, I'm new to the forums. I'm 15 and i think i have OCD, along with my depersonalization disorder and other numerous anxiety disorders. The past 5 or 6 weeks, i forget, i have been constantly worrying that im going schizophrenic! It's always on my mind, and it won't go away! Im so ridden with anxiety and so exhausted... it's killing me :[. I've been having constant intrusive images of me walking around as a homeless dude talking to himself or something... its really scary :
: Also, i've had images like my kitten lying on the floor dead and my house burning down and it's so disturbing D: I would never harm my animals and I love them to death but i get so worried that something is going to happen to them!
Some of my obsessions: Fear of going schizophrenic, fear of hallucinating/being delusional, seeing my house burn down, stabbing people with knives *Scary*, other weird things like throwing my cellphone out of my car, and when im riding in busses im afraid were going to drive off a cliff or something :[ Worrying about cancer, and meningococcal meningitis
Possible compulsions?: How i was myself in the shower, hair, then the rest of my body, im afraid i wont get clean if i wash myself any other way, also how i dry myself off when i get out of the shower; face, chest, arms, legs, back, then hair, ALWAYS has to be wet, but not dripping wet. Stepping twice in sidewalk squares, no matter how big or small it is. Avoiding cracks, i dont want to break my moms back <--stupid fear, When i touch something, i touch it 21 times, when i wash my hands, i rub my hands in running water 21 times, squirt soap three times, rub my hands again 21 times, shake my hands 21 times, and pat my hands dry... you guessed it, 21 times I think its 21 because 7 is my lucky number, and 3 is a "good" number, and 7 times three is 21, and 2+1 = 3 lol... its stupid. I only use 3 types of towels and one type of spoon/fork *i bring utensils to restaurants*. I check the stove constantly after its been used during the day, just to make sure its off, even though i know it is..
Any feedback would help! thanks!
: Also, i've had images like my kitten lying on the floor dead and my house burning down and it's so disturbing D: I would never harm my animals and I love them to death but i get so worried that something is going to happen to them!Some of my obsessions: Fear of going schizophrenic, fear of hallucinating/being delusional, seeing my house burn down, stabbing people with knives *Scary*, other weird things like throwing my cellphone out of my car, and when im riding in busses im afraid were going to drive off a cliff or something :[ Worrying about cancer, and meningococcal meningitis
Possible compulsions?: How i was myself in the shower, hair, then the rest of my body, im afraid i wont get clean if i wash myself any other way, also how i dry myself off when i get out of the shower; face, chest, arms, legs, back, then hair, ALWAYS has to be wet, but not dripping wet. Stepping twice in sidewalk squares, no matter how big or small it is. Avoiding cracks, i dont want to break my moms back <--stupid fear, When i touch something, i touch it 21 times, when i wash my hands, i rub my hands in running water 21 times, squirt soap three times, rub my hands again 21 times, shake my hands 21 times, and pat my hands dry... you guessed it, 21 times
I think its 21 because 7 is my lucky number, and 3 is a "good" number, and 7 times three is 21, and 2+1 = 3 lol... its stupid. I only use 3 types of towels and one type of spoon/fork *i bring utensils to restaurants*. I check the stove constantly after its been used during the day, just to make sure its off, even though i know it is..Any feedback would help! thanks!
