Not receiving eye contact

[jryden]

As much as I hate eye contact for a long period of time, I get offended when I am not given any!

I went to a business meeting last night and the guy giving the presentation would not look at me. I know them on a personal level so they know my personality. But even with that, they encourage me to give eye contact so what about to me.

I felt unimportant, like he wasn't talking me seriously. I was the youngest one there which made me feel weird. Like a kid tossed to the side.

I saw his eyes move side to side and he would stop at the lady next to me.

 

[jaim38]

Maybe he senses that you have SA so he avoids making eye contact with you because it would creep you out.

I don't care if people make eye contact with me or not, as long as they don't dislike or hate me. If I know they don't like me, I would feel very uncomfortable sitting through their lecture/presentation.

 

[truffleshuffle]

Its strange for me If they can;t look me in the eye I get the feeling I am not wanted. Or they are discusted by me and if I do get the eye contact I always wonder why they looked at me.

 

[jryden]

Its strange for me If they can;t look me in the eye I get the feeling I am not wanted. Or they are discusted by me and if I do get the eye contact I always wonder why they looked at me.

This exactly. I don't want it but feel offended If I don't get it.

Even when ppl talk to me, I secretly want them to go away but when someone talks to everyone but you, its rude.

 

[musics_advocate]

I always found it strange that every piece of literature I know of (or have heard of even slightly) that talk about good methods of communication through body language, they always mention eye contact and tell you to "maintain" it. Well, maybe I'm in the minority, but what exactly do they mean to "maintain" eye contact? I always give full, almost unbroken eye contact to someone when they're speaking to me, but I have a hard time "maintaining" it when I'm the one doing the speaking, even if it's just one other person.

Constant, unbroken eye contact kind of feels creepy, as if I'm staring at them. It's usually okay when they're talking because it seems like everyone kind of darts their eyes here and there when speaking, but it seems kind of strange how un-weird it feels to "maintain" eye contact when you're listening, but completely awkward when you're speaking. Anyone have any thoughts on this?

 

[jryden]

Maybe he senses that you have SA so he avoids making eye contact with you because it would creep you out.

I don't care if people make eye contact with me or not, as long as they don't dislike or hate me. If I know they don't like me, I would feel very uncomfortable sitting through their lecture/presentation.

They prob don't even know what SA is. And no these are people who push me to be more social. He wouldn't do anything to keep me in my comfort zone.

 

[truffleshuffle]

This exactly. I don't want it but feel offended If I don't get it.

Even when ppl talk to me, I secretly want them to go away but when someone talks to everyone but you, its rude.

I only want them to go away if im unconfortable around them but I usealy feel thy want me to leave.

 

[jaim38]

I always found it strange that every piece of literature I know of (or have heard of even slightly) that talk about good methods of communication through body language, they always mention eye contact and tell you to "maintain" it. Well, maybe I'm in the minority, but what exactly do they mean to "maintain" eye contact? I always give full, almost unbroken eye contact to someone when they're speaking to me, but I have a hard time "maintaining" it when I'm the one doing the speaking, even if it's just one other person.

Yeah, that's the confusing part. I read from some textbook that during interviews, we should maintain eye contact for roughly 70% of the time.

Constant, unbroken eye contact kind of feels creepy, as if I'm staring at them. It's usually okay when they're talking because it seems like everyone kind of darts their eyes here and there when speaking, but it seems kind of strange how un-weird it feels to "maintain" eye contact when you're listening, but completely awkward when you're speaking. Anyone have any thoughts on this?

Actually, it's the other way around for me. When I'm the one talking, I try to come up with words to say so I pay little or no attention to eye contact. I try not to sound stupid. But when I'm the one listening, I worry about freaking people out with too much eye contact. Sometimes, I have trouble breathing when worrying about eye contact.

 

[21NZ]

maybe your just good looking and he feels uncomfortable looking at you? who were the other people there? old, young, female, male.... from Craigslist? some people just have a blank stare, like they look right through you... sort of.

 

[truffleshuffle]

maybe your just good looking and he feels uncomfortable looking at you? who were the other people there? old, young, female, male.... from Craigslist? some people just have a blank stare, like they look right through you... sort of.

That could also be it I have a hard time looking at attractive women. Mostly because of my insecuritys but I would hate for them to be creeped out or something by me looking at them.

 

[Lea]

I can´t help feeling that it´s rude to look at the person I am speaking to. When I tell ppl they say, no, it´s rude when you don´t look. Yeah but what shall I do, I can´t help this feeling. I think my body and its reactions must be somehow inherently wrong.

 

[jryden]

maybe your just good looking and he feels uncomfortable looking at you? who were the other people there? old, young, female, male.... from Craigslist? some people just have a blank stare, like they look right through you... sort of.

No they were not from CL lol

And no I am not good looking. HA but thanks for the laugh.

He's a fam friend, like an Uncle who is twice my age so its nothing like that.
4 women-40's and 60.
3 men-40's+

 

[truffleshuffle]

No they were not from CL lol

And no I am not good looking. HA but thanks for the laugh.

He's a fam friend, like an Uncle who is twice my age so its nothing like that.
4 women-40's and 60.
3 men-40's+

Im sure you are attractive. maybe he was nervious and since he knows you well as being a fam friend he thought it better to give his eyecontact to the people in the room he was less familer with.