Need a new job but SP stops me


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My job now is good socially as i work in a busy cafe and there's not too much time for talking. Also 3 of us have social anxieties which makes me feel sooo much better as all my others jobs i've been surrounded with confident/bitchy people who don't understand and i get fed up with "your quiet" !!!

Anyway i've been thinking hard and really want to get a new job, but me and the bf have been thinking about moving to Canada for a year (were from UK)
My social phobia puts me off as i keep picturing my old jobs where i was so quiet and people commented on it , but i feel so comfortable ish in my cafe job.

So frustrated because i want to make a big change and explore the world but anxieties are making me back off.


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I know how you feel, my life is at an utter standstill. My job isn't what I want to do at all, but the idea of starting fresh somewhere, interviews... too terrifying.

I'm quite astounded that anyone can have SA and be a waitress though! That would be like, my most ill suited job,


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I have SA and have been waitress, a busboy before that when I was too young to wait tables. It forces you to get out and try to be social and yes it is torture for people like us but what choice do we have in a lot of cases? I found myself enjoying it sometimes tbh, It gave me some confidence and made me realize I can do anything if I really try, regardless of mental handicaps. The money doesn't hurt either. I found the more I got out of my shell the better the tips-bigger faker smiles, better money. The world is rigged for people who are out going, there is no doubt about it but we all have to keep trying.
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Well perhaps it is time to face your fears. I see two options. Continuing the way you are and being frustrated and helpless or going outside of your comfort zone and learning to deal with these things.

Change isn't easy and it isn't instant. If we don't change the way we act then our anxieties wont get any better. I personally try and own up to the fact that my fears are my problem, not anyone else's and I try and accept when people call me quiet because the truth is that I am quiet and it is much easier to accept that fact than to get upset when people point out the obvious. I can try and hide behind other people that are shy and dont point out the things in me that I dont want to see my whole life but that is a life that is full of fear and I dont want that. I want to change and I must put myself in uncomfortable situations in order to do that. There is no magic potion or pill that will make me change the way I perceive the world. I have to do it through my own experience. If I don't, I will be destined to a very lonely life full of fear and seclusion.