Longing to Love

[brokenfingers04]

I have this longing to love any woman who would let me. I feel I have so much love to give and share with them but Im so scared to open my mouth and say that.

 

[Xervello]

I used to feel that way, bf. And I don't doubt your sincerity. In my late teens/early twenties I had no experience with girls and I deified them. Each were flawless. I wanted nothing but to give them all the love I had. I don't know if our circumstances are anything alike, but what I will tell you is that women are no different than men. As beautiful and mysterious as some may be, some can also be mean and exploitative. Don't let your eagerness cloud your judgement. Because if someone were to take advantage of your desire, it could turn it bitter or mistrustful and cause you needless pain. And at the same time, women want to be treated as people, too. They don't want to be put on a pedestal having to measure up to some perfect expectation they can't possibly live up to. As good intentioned as that is, they want to be seen for who they really are. Heard. Valued. Not just loved because they're of the opposite gender.

So my advice is to be yourself, but be mindful of who the person really is, and also how you come off. Don't overwhelm someone with your over-eagerness. It can come off as desperate and creepy. Treat them as you would anyone - listen to what they're saying, not just for the sake of hearing them - and share with them your own thoughts, let them know what you have to offer. Sometimes the person will be responsive, other times they won't. I sympathize, I really do. But we can't just snap our fingers and have it happen. Real love needs to be sought after before it is found. Good luck.

 

[brokenfingers04]

Thanks for that X.