Draconess25
Well-known member
My mom and I have to choose between living with her good-for-nothing piece of shit emotionally abusive husband OR applying for public housing, getting rid of the dogs who I would give my life for, and starting from near-scratch with only $500 a month. I'm too much of a *****-*** little piece of shit to get a job, because I'd probably piss my pants just filling out the application, so neither of us will have a phone. And people say, "Oh you'll be fine without a phone. You only use it for texting." Yes, and that's all I need it for, not all the other useless shit my mom is paying for. People don't understand that without my phone, I curl up in bed all day crying and shaking because for all I know, everyone I love could DIE and I wouldn't know it until it's too late and I never got the chance to tell them I loved them one last time before their house burnt down because the electric in their house isn't grounded! I TOLD my mom I wanted the $25 prepaid thing at AT&T, but the salesman just HAD to convince her that Sprint has better signal quality. ALL my friends have prepaid phones that work JUST FINE, while I've had an average of 2 bars since we switched to Sprint. So my mom is spending MORE money on LESS. And she doesn't understand that I would LOVE to have my own job and make my own money, but as far as her and her husband are concerned, my SA is just an excuse for me to lie in bed all day and be lazy. I lie in bed all day because I'm DEPRESSED! Because I have nothing to look forward to! Because I just wish I could close my eyes and go to sleep! Sleep is the only peace I get, until I have a horribly vivid nightmare of my mom's husband raping or stabbing me, or of my boyfriend or mom or Granny being burned alive. And that's what'll happen. I'll have to say "I love you" to some charred bones or a rotten corpse in someone's trunk. Yes, I may just be another example of some pathetic American reliant on their phone, but not to Twitter shit or play Candy Crush. I don't even know what the hell Candy Crush is. No, I need my phone to stay in contact with the ones I love. If I can't contact them, they are hurt or sick or dead, and I might as well be. Actually, I might as well be, anyways. It's MY fault I'm too much of a ***** to get a job, it's MY fault we have no money, it's MY fault we have to find somewhere else to live, it's MY fault my mom and her husband fight, it's MY fault I don't get along with that *******. Don't even bother with the fact that he stabbed my mom when they were my age, busted my Granny's head open, was in prison for a year when his first son was born, went to prison AGAIN for 21 years for armed robbery and attempted murder when his second son was born, and has the nerve to tell my mom that he grieves my brother's suicide more that she does and that she's a bad mother. What the hell does HE know about parenting?! He was incarcerated for over half his life! I wish the cirrhosis would just kill him already. "Oh, that's a horrible thing to say!" "You shouldn't stay stuff like that!" "It's bad luck to wish that on someone!" "Be careful what you wish for!" He is a terrible person and deserves to suffer and die. Ugh, I'm so stressed that I can't even sleep or eat, cause food costs too much money for me to be eating it. Besides, I can't be in the kitchen for more than 5 minutes without that bald scumbag walking in and giving me a dirty look! Either way, I'm screwed. If we stay, we have to walk on eggshells all the time, I have to barricade the bathroom door when I shower, I have to make sandwiches in my bedroom, I can't sleep at night, and we'll eventually get kicked out anyways. If we live, we STILL have to walk on eggshells because public housing is so damn strict, we won't have the money to pay the water bill, we won't have the money for food, I'll never be able to contact my loved ones because I'm too pathetic to even scrap together $25 a month, and we'll have to get up Gizmo and Snickers, who I care about more than life itself. I just wish a comet would hit....
You live in a real terror 
