LilMissTragic
Well-known member
*Gone*
Insecure people!
- Thread starter LilMissTragic
- Start date
silgado106
Member
I completely agree with Wistful's second paragraph. Yes, we did attack you (me included). But the reason we attacked you was because of the way you started the conversation. You yourself started by attacking us, and it is normal human behaviour to defend one's self. If you would have started in a different way, for example something like "I don't really understand this and that about SP" I am sure this whole thread would be completely different right now.
I also agree with LilMiss. I find it easier to be rude towards someone that is being rude towards me, than to be friendly towards someone who is being friendly, or even to be rude towards someone who is being friendly. The latter one I would never do. Even if I actually despise the person for whatever personal reasons, if they are being nice to me right now, I am not going to act rude towards them, it is just how I am.
I also agree with LilMiss. I find it easier to be rude towards someone that is being rude towards me, than to be friendly towards someone who is being friendly, or even to be rude towards someone who is being friendly. The latter one I would never do. Even if I actually despise the person for whatever personal reasons, if they are being nice to me right now, I am not going to act rude towards them, it is just how I am.
Anonymous
Well-known member
LilMissTragic, the trick is not to be open and aggressive but the trick is to take the SP slowly, for him not to realize if I’m being aggressive or only being frank, thus avoiding an out burst from the SP side, and as the SP is always afraid of being judged to be rude or something, they tend to take it on and by the time they figure out what is going on, the laughs are over and everybody is gone and they spend the rest of the night wondering how could they let someone treat them like that.
Anonymous
Well-known member
I admire your honesty Norm. I'll give you that. I also know that it's extremely difficult for people to understand what SP's are 'made of'. My own family can't understand what this disorder is like and although I have repeatedly tried to make them understand my feelings and what it's like, they just can NOT comprehend and will continually ask me to do things for them that puts me right in the middle of my anxieties. I can even see how we phobics must come across to others as 'lazy' & hiding behind our fears, etc.
"Change!", "Change!", "Change!", that's all we ever hear from people that can NOT comprehend this affliction (including professionals), and they have NO IDEA just how much we would love to have the ability to do JUST THAT. Imagine if you can--- hating someone you need to see or talk to every day, do you just wake up one morning and say to yourself, "Starting today, I am NOT going to hate this person anymore!" Does it work for you? It doesn't work for me! Maybe unafflicted people CAN change thier thoughts, feelings, emotions with a thought pattern, like turning off and on a light, but I think that us phobics all have it in common that we are not capeable of doing that.
"Change!", "Change!", "Change!", that's all we ever hear from people that can NOT comprehend this affliction (including professionals), and they have NO IDEA just how much we would love to have the ability to do JUST THAT. Imagine if you can--- hating someone you need to see or talk to every day, do you just wake up one morning and say to yourself, "Starting today, I am NOT going to hate this person anymore!" Does it work for you? It doesn't work for me! Maybe unafflicted people CAN change thier thoughts, feelings, emotions with a thought pattern, like turning off and on a light, but I think that us phobics all have it in common that we are not capeable of doing that.
Anonymous
Well-known member
And..by the way Norm, again, I'm amazed at your honesty--- you admit to purposely trying to hurt and humiliate phobics in public. I suppose you are aware that you are deepening that person's afflictions and you just don't care? Yikes! What do you do for 'kicks' when your not attempting to make a phobic's life even worse? Kick cats? Practical Jokes? Threatening your Grandma?
wistful_dementia
Well-known member
Norm, you might want to check with your therapist to find out if your 'anger' problem might just be an underlying symptom of a larger problem... ask your therapist if you might have Antisocial Personality Disorder, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, Type 2 bipolar disorder, or Schizotypal Personality Disorder. And don't forget to mention this site to your therapist. Take care.
LilMissTragic
Well-known member
*Gone*
Anonymous
Well-known member
Unfortunately LilMissTragic I am as secure as they come, and it just puts me off seeing helpless people like you, you blame it on your childhood, parents,..etc you name it , and then you go back to watching TV and feeling depressed, we all had some episode or another in our life but we managed to kick out of it.
LilMissTragic
Well-known member
*Gone*
wistful_dementia
Well-known member
Did lilmiss say that? Did anyone here actually say I had a terrible childhood; my brain has been warped so there is absolutely nothing I can do? Maybe a few and maybe a few implied that. But, what do you blame your need to attack other people about there problems on? It certainly doesn't make you any better than those that you are attacking. And, by condemning people through your insults isn't going to teach MOST people a lesson at all. You are just going to reinforce their fear and apprehension of people such as yourself.
So what is it that you want to accomplish? If you don't boost your fragile esteem by insulting people then why are you so easily humored? Are you just slightly mentally incapacitated or mildly retarded?
Look I agree with you view point... it's obvious that people should be more responsible for their own emotions and stop blaming stupid people like yourself or their child hoods. I don't think everyone here does that.
Since you are crying out for an education and obviously have a difficult time reading what Social Anxiety is really about, I will try to educate you in a very simplistic way...
So what is it that you want to accomplish? If you don't boost your fragile esteem by insulting people then why are you so easily humored? Are you just slightly mentally incapacitated or mildly retarded?
Look I agree with you view point... it's obvious that people should be more responsible for their own emotions and stop blaming stupid people like yourself or their child hoods. I don't think everyone here does that.
Since you are crying out for an education and obviously have a difficult time reading what Social Anxiety is really about, I will try to educate you in a very simplistic way...
Anonymous
Well-known member
norm said:
The joke's on you, pal! Laughing at the mentally ill is the ultimate in pathetic.
Amazing that you have nothing better to do than come here and cast aspersions. Your inner sense of inferiority and inadequacy must be remarkable indeed to drive such insouciantly duncical behavior. That or too much TV (the incessant glorification of idiots and assholes on the tube has definite negative effects on one's choice of role models). Probably both. I take it you were picked on as a child?
Tell your psychs, everyone-- Norm is a case study waiting to happen.
wistful_dementia
Well-known member
Since you are crying out for an education and obviously have a difficult time reading what Social Anxiety is really about, I will try to educate you in a very simplistic way...
In the animal world there is a structure... and yes, human are animals too... this structure is not only determined by who is larger, etc. etc.. There is also a chemical and neurological reason why some people maybe more shy than others. Take a look at experiments done on rats and certain primates. When serotonin levels and other neurotransmitters where increased they actually became less shy and more sociable. This demonstrates that social phobia isn't just an imagined neurosis. You may speculate and hypothesize that there is no genetic component to SA, but scientific evidence points towards it. Most socialphobes, who might have a chemical deficiency may only subconsciously pick up on social hierarchy... I myself always being analytical picked up on this very early in my life, hence avoiding eye contact, etc. I myself rebelled, because I believe that we have this great big brain that allows us to evolve. And we humans have made life difficult enough without having to play useless survival of the fittest contest. But, don't worry, survival of the fittest will take care of itself, you don't have to play your mindless part. I noticed a difference in social structure doesn't mean that I hate anyone.... so don't be so insecure thinking that all socialphobes hate 'norms'.
But like many things in this life it is not quite that simple.... the brain and human behavior are the most complex things on this earth. While genetics lay the foundations for either having SA and when it is activated and to what extreme that it is activated, our environments and how we were raised also plays a role. I think that it is important that we become aware of what factors play a role in which we are today. But, like you love to point out it is ultimately our responsibility to get past our fears and anxieties.
And then you may point out... but, but.... allot of people here if not maybe most simply have a neurosis. My answer is so? So do you apparently. Does that make us any better or worse? These people need help in thinking correctly... through reasoning, not simple minded insults.
Then you may say... but you just need to be more secure (I’ve already gone over the 'hate people' part). No... shit... Many others and I already realize this... it's called a phobia... many people who have phobias and OCD already realize that our fears are irrational.
Then you may say.... but... but... you need to be less focused on yourself. Oh wow, a rocket scientist! That is good advice... it absolutely helps! But, still there is that nagging natural shyness that needs to be conquered. Through correct thinking and facing our fears it can be accomplished. For some easier than others... it depends upon the severity of our condition. And, yes studies have shown that through reasoning it can be possible, completely sometimes other times to a degree) to change brain chemistry and brain structure. Those without a biological component to SAD can recover faster (in my opinion).
Lastly, you may argue that are thinking alone causes the biological response... the chemical activation... at the very least there is a gene that sets boundaries... So please don't get mad... get glad, silly person.
In the animal world there is a structure... and yes, human are animals too... this structure is not only determined by who is larger, etc. etc.. There is also a chemical and neurological reason why some people maybe more shy than others. Take a look at experiments done on rats and certain primates. When serotonin levels and other neurotransmitters where increased they actually became less shy and more sociable. This demonstrates that social phobia isn't just an imagined neurosis. You may speculate and hypothesize that there is no genetic component to SA, but scientific evidence points towards it. Most socialphobes, who might have a chemical deficiency may only subconsciously pick up on social hierarchy... I myself always being analytical picked up on this very early in my life, hence avoiding eye contact, etc. I myself rebelled, because I believe that we have this great big brain that allows us to evolve. And we humans have made life difficult enough without having to play useless survival of the fittest contest. But, don't worry, survival of the fittest will take care of itself, you don't have to play your mindless part. I noticed a difference in social structure doesn't mean that I hate anyone.... so don't be so insecure thinking that all socialphobes hate 'norms'.
But like many things in this life it is not quite that simple.... the brain and human behavior are the most complex things on this earth. While genetics lay the foundations for either having SA and when it is activated and to what extreme that it is activated, our environments and how we were raised also plays a role. I think that it is important that we become aware of what factors play a role in which we are today. But, like you love to point out it is ultimately our responsibility to get past our fears and anxieties.
And then you may point out... but, but.... allot of people here if not maybe most simply have a neurosis. My answer is so? So do you apparently. Does that make us any better or worse? These people need help in thinking correctly... through reasoning, not simple minded insults.
Then you may say... but you just need to be more secure (I’ve already gone over the 'hate people' part). No... shit... Many others and I already realize this... it's called a phobia... many people who have phobias and OCD already realize that our fears are irrational.
Then you may say.... but... but... you need to be less focused on yourself. Oh wow, a rocket scientist! That is good advice... it absolutely helps! But, still there is that nagging natural shyness that needs to be conquered. Through correct thinking and facing our fears it can be accomplished. For some easier than others... it depends upon the severity of our condition. And, yes studies have shown that through reasoning it can be possible, completely sometimes other times to a degree) to change brain chemistry and brain structure. Those without a biological component to SAD can recover faster (in my opinion).
Lastly, you may argue that are thinking alone causes the biological response... the chemical activation... at the very least there is a gene that sets boundaries... So please don't get mad... get glad, silly person.
Anonymous
Well-known member
norm said:
Woo hoo! Classic! Norm, you know, "Denial" ain't a river in Egypt!!
LOL!
Noone who is at all "secure" would trawl around mental health web sites looking to troll. Apparently you're in dire need of a hug, or a puppy, or (most likely) a life. I'd be surprised to find that you're a day over 17 (wither that or the West is really getting dumber and dumber, as the pedants like to say).
How low can Norm continue to go? I dunno! He needs a grandmotherly prescence to pat his hand and say "Now, now. There, there. I know, sugar, it's OK, I know."
LilMissTragic
Well-known member
*Gone*
Anonymous
Well-known member
wow!.... poor Norm.... I thought being a SP was rough.....Constant criticism, nit-picking, no empathy, control freak, denial, charm, glib, compulsive liar, devious, manipulative? Read this:
The serial bully
"All cruelty springs from weakness."
(Seneca, 4BC-AD65)
"The truth is incontrovertible; malice may attack it, ignorance my deride it, but in the end, there it is."
Winston Churchill
I estimate one person in thirty, male or female, is a serial bully. Who does the following profile describe in your life?
The serial bully:
is emotionally retarded with an arrested level of emotional development; whilst language and intellect may appear to be that of an adult, the bully displays the emotional age of a five-year-old
is emotionally immature and emotionally untrustworthy
exhibits unusual and inappropriate attitudes to sexual matters, sexual behaviour and bodily functions; underneath the charming exterior there are often suspicions or hints of sex discrimination and sexual harassment, perhaps also sexual dysfunction, sexual inadequacy, sexual violence or sexual abuse
in a relationship, is incapable of initiating or sustaining intimacy
holds deep prejudices (eg against the opposite gender, people of a different sexual orientation, other cultures and religious beliefs, foreigners, etc - prejudiced people are unvaryingly unimaginative) but goes to great lengths to keep this prejudicial aspect of their personality secret
is a control freak and has a compulsive need to control everyone and everything you say, do, think and believe; for example, will launch an immediate personal attack attempting to restrict what you are permitted to say if you start talking knowledgeably about psychopathic personality or antisocial personality disorder in their presence - but aggressively maintains the right to talk (usually unknowledgeably) about anything they choose; serial bullies despise anyone who enables others to see through their deception and their mask of sanity
displays a compulsive need to criticise whilst simultaneously refusing to value, praise and acknowledge others, their achievements, or their existence
shows a lack of joined-up thinking with conversation that doesn't flow and arguments that don't hold water
The serial bully appears to lack insight into his or her behaviour and seems to be oblivious to the crassness and inappropriateness thereof; however, it is more likely that the bully knows what they are doing but elects to switch off the moral and ethical considerations by which normal people are bound. If the bully knows what they are doing, they are responsible for their behaviour and thus liable for its consequences to other people. If the bully doesn't know what they are doing, they should be suspended from duty on the grounds of diminished responsibility and the provisions of the Mental Health Act should apply.
Serial bullies harbour a particular hatred of anyone who can articulate their behaviour profile, either verbally or in writing - as on this page - in a manner which helps other people see through their deception and their mask of deceit. The usual instinctive response is to launch a bitter personal attack on the person's credentials, lack of qualifications, and right to talk about personality disorders, psychopathic personality etc, whilst preserving their right to talk about anything they choose - all the while adding nothing to the debate themselves.
Serial bullies hate to see themselves and their behaviour reflected as if they are looking into a mirror.
Projection
Bullies project their inadequacies, shortcomings, behaviours etc on to other people to avoid facing up to their inadequacy and doing something about it (learning about oneself can be painful), and to distract and divert attention away from themselves and their inadequacies. Projection is achieved through blame, criticism and allegation; once you realise this, every criticism, allegation etc that the bully makes about their target is actually an admission or revelation about themselves. This knowledge can be used to perceive the bully's own misdemeanours; for instance, when the allegations are of financial or sexual impropriety, it is likely that the bully has committed these acts; when the bully makes an allegation of abuse (such allegations tend to be vague and non-specific), it is likely to be the bully who has committed the abuse. When the bully makes allegations of, say, "cowardice" or "negative attitude" it is the bully who is a coward or has a negative attitude.
When the symptoms of psychiatric injury become apparent to others, most bullies will play the Mental Health Trap, claiming their target is "mentally ill" or "mentally unstable" or has a "mental health problem". It is more likely that this allegation is a projection of the bully's own mental health problems.
http://www.bullyonline.org/work/bully/serial/htm
tommydog
Well-known member
hehe :lol:
yer i have done a "social experiment" a few times. I went out and spent the day shopping and looking around, ignored everyone that spoke to me, and i mean completely ignored them, it was great ! :lol:
i was in like my own personal space, completely relaxed, and i dunno what the point of behaving that way was, also i didnt set out that day to be a moron hehe but i just felt like it and i found it to be very relaxing, and very entertaining
edit: give norm a break guys, his trying on the 'ol tough love approuch, or actually just plain ol tough approuch :lol: his got some points though, even though he is bieng a rude jackass :lol:
yer i have done a "social experiment" a few times. I went out and spent the day shopping and looking around, ignored everyone that spoke to me, and i mean completely ignored them, it was great ! :lol:
i was in like my own personal space, completely relaxed, and i dunno what the point of behaving that way was, also i didnt set out that day to be a moron hehe but i just felt like it and i found it to be very relaxing, and very entertaining
edit: give norm a break guys, his trying on the 'ol tough love approuch, or actually just plain ol tough approuch :lol: his got some points though, even though he is bieng a rude jackass :lol:
Anonymous
Well-known member
My my….ain’t the whole SP community out to get me. For all the people who copied and pasted articles from web sites without even reading them, thank you for the free education. I will only say that I am what you need, people like me keep you alive, keeps you trying to be better, gives a role model to follow, I am your medicine and sometimes medicine is bitter but it heals you. Come on, deny it and post more messages, lie to yourselves, cheat, say nasty things about me, but I stay your purpose in life, your target, your messiah.