In my life Girls come and Go

[Man on the Moon]

I never had the chance to articulate these thoughts until now. I've met a lot of great girls in my past. They were really attractive, funny, smart, and easy to get along with. However, the trouble with me was that I always let them slip by. Mostly due to my shortcomings, I never had the opportunity to develop anything further than a mere acquaintance with these women. And of course, I hold on to these memories like jewels. I allow these memories to engulf my whole being. I feel joy, frustration, and most of all regret. Regret because I never knew how to express my feelings. While these women move on with their lives, I am stuck in the past. I fear that every woman that I meet, I will repeat the same mistakes and let them fly by. How do I stop this torturous cycle? I always consider reconnecting with them, but every ounce of my judgement stops me. I ask myself, do I want to be labeled as a stalker? And the answer is no. So, I remain the everlasting frustrated soul.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ukbbPJirTaE

 

[CrzyDrmr]

I feel for you man. I have a BAD habit of hanging onto old stuff like this from the past, and torturing myself with it, always wondering "what if" about the people that have come and gone over the years. A decent handful of ladies like you, who were funny, kind, and good looking, and I never took anything to the next level really. Just kind of doubted myself and then it dissolved eventually. I wouldn't be too quick to find any of them either, for fear of looking like a lunatic. "Hey remember me from 7 years ago when we worked together for 2 months?!". Nah, not happening...

 

[Man on the Moon]

Yeah. I believe that if nothing happened at the time, then certainly nothing again will happen by forcing the situation. Maybe in the movies? But I've learned too many from my mistakes to start acting out fantasy's.

 

[CrzyDrmr]

Yeah that's only in the movies unfortunately. I guess it's crude and heartless when it comes to expressions, but they do say if you snooze you lose...starting to believe that now.

 

[Purplepixies]

I know only 'dudes' should be answering this but as a girl I'd like so say that the young ones like me ( I'm only 20) and I will refer to most women in their 20's and even early 30's don't know what they want and sometimes a guy that seems perfect during the summer seems so far from our wants during the winter. It's a shame that we sometimes don't give men enough time to respond to their feelings. Us women are more prone to expressing our "here-and-now" feelings in a wide arrange of ways. However very few men can do this when they should, and by the time they want to let it out, it's too late for we have ran into the arms of other men. Don't worry I'm sure you'll find someone. Contrary to popular belief, I say always let your feelings out and if they run away it's because they didn't feel the same for you and they aren't worth your time. Always pick the ones that respond as you do. So if one day you meet someone and you feel like it's too early in the relationship to be outspoken about what you feel, do it anyways. How they respond will let you know if they're the one ^_^ Good Luck mate :3

 

[Man on the Moon]

Wow I really liked reading your answer. I liked it so much that I read it twice. I was actually hoping to get a girl's perspective on this and I'm glad you responded.
It is true. For me at least, I always understand my feelings after, after everything that has happened. And of course, when I finally do understand my feelings, the girl has already found somebody else. But, to give myself a brea, I tell myself, "She wasn't for me."

 

[Purplepixies]

You don't know how useful your response made me feel ^_^
It's that "YAY I HELPED SOMEONE SO I FEEL AWESOME!" type of feeling.

 

[uncle]

I can relate to your post Man on the moon. I had the exact problem. I never took any chances becase I feared rejection and embarrassment.

Until one day my Dad came home with WEBTV. I doubt anyone even remembers it besides a few of the other old timers in here. But it changed my dating life. It was the dawn of the "Chat room" and there were lots of people on it.

It was so easy to ask a girl out online, because if she said no, who cares? There's a million more a few clicks away. You did not have look them in the eye. You could have worst clothes on and who would know the differance?

My point is that if you can try online dating. Or can you get dates on facebook? Can you send a girl your interested in a private message? I don't know because I actually married a girl I met online 10 years ago.

 

[ridicule]

I actually think it's a waste of time. Maybe super suave guys can pull off the instant romance right from the start, but I can't, and I think it has partly to due with something we all share in common, on this site. So instead of dwelling on the past, consider that a done deal and move on. Like Uncle said, there's a million more out there. And just start talking to girls with the opinion of just being friends and see where it goes. All the girls who I've been interested in have all just been friends with me, and I think that's the right place to start for people like us.

 

[mikebird]

That post is exactly what I say to people, all the time!

I have found amazing girls for years, who are exciting, fascinating and smart, and full of enthusiasm - when they were students, and I was! And after that...

... everything ends up with rejection, with no reason. Either on a train platform, in a restaurant, or she's gone to work when I wake up at her place, so I let myself out, or I wake up at home, and she's gone, and her handbag's gone, but a pair of knickers on the floor.

 

[Purplepixies]

Ah leaving behind underwear. That's something I plan to do if I ever star having sex! LOL.
It's so awesome. ALTHOUGH! Victoria's Secret has been charging me a frigging arm and a leg for the pretty stuff! It's expensive... idk if I want to do this anymore lol. MEH... I do want to, it's worth it.