I'm FCKED for eternity

[Jay Cataldo]

The last social gathering I went to, I was standing around the chips and salsa.
And all of the sudden a bunch of people came and crowded around to eat some also.
I tried thinking of some conversation to strike up, and I ended up telling them why nixtamalized corn is infinitely better than regular untreated corn.
After I was done, they all just walked away. No numbers, no nothin.
*rain pours down*

hehe but thanks for the uplifting reply

Ok, I take back what I said. lol

Dude, that is total reality tv show material. I'm thinking "Corn Boy in the Corner." Once we get you on the tube you'll be getting a lot more than just phone numbers.

 

[NormanBates]

HA
Hmm totally interested tho in what simple thing it is that fuels this irrational fear.
I would love to be somebody's psychology cadaver.

 

[Jay Cataldo]

HA
Hmm totally interested tho in what simple thing it is that fuels this irrational fear.
I would love to be somebody's psychology cadaver.

In my experience, the root causes are different for everybody, but JBrown is adamant that it's a fear of being alone and he sounds like a smart dude so I'm gonna test it before I rule it out.

In my practice, I use a variety of techniques to help people uncover the root causes of their problems and then resolve whatever emotional imbalances are driving those issues. I primarily use a technique called EFT above all else (there's a free book on it available at the site emofree.com). And I have also found a technique called "focusing" to be effective which you can learn from the book by the same name... the author is Eugene Gendlin.

Check out these resources and let me know how they work for you.

 

[Jay Cataldo]

You know to a social phobic when he is in public his fears are always of EVERYONE being against him, is it doing something weird and all people noticing or something similar. Why you think the mind of a social phobic is preocupied with unreal thoughts like this, it's so simple coz if everyone is against him how does that make him feel?? ALONE, that's what he is scared of

Social phobia is really simple to understand... people who are outgoing they don't fear they will end up alone, so they talk, joke with everyone, no fears of approaching people

Social phobics don't socialize, scared of approaching people coz they are scared of finding out they won't be accepted, liked, so they will be alone

Listen to a social phobic about his fears of socializing and you will see everything leads to finding an excuse for not being accepted, which leads to being alone

A social phobic is rather alone for years then dare to socialize and find out he can't be accepted so he will end up alone- that's death threatening to him, that's the irrational fear behind social anxiety

So now they have an excuse if you will... if you try healing a social phobic with EFt his subcounscious won't give up of this social anxiety, he has no excuse for being alone anymore, and the world is not safe to him being alone

Ok, so what you are saying is that a social phobic is scared to talk to people because if he finds out he wont be accepted, it means he will be alone, which is his biggest fear. So in order to avoid facing the fact that he will be alone forever he spends his time alone, which is safe for him because there's nobody there to remind him that he will never not be alone? lol Trippy.

All kidding aside, am I following you here or am I missing a piece of it?

And fyi, there's some new EFT stuff that people are using with great results. One technique is called the "choices method" which is similar to using affirmations with EFT. Whereas the traditional way is to tap on the negatives, i.e. "even though I have this issue and nobody likes me and my life sucks, etc..." with the choices method, you tap on the opposite, desired outcome, i.e., "Even though I have this issue, I choose to approach 3 new people a day and say hi, etc."

I agree with what you said here: "he has no excuse for being alone anymore, and the world is not safe to him being alone" In my experience, to "cure" someone you must also give them the tools to feel "safe" amongst others, such as teaching them how to be witty and funny, how to make friends, how to influence others, how to be attractive, etc. And the choices method helps me teach my clients these new behaviors without as much resistance as would normally be there. Check it out. There should be some free articles on it at the emofree site.

 

[lilcharlie]

I'll preface this, as that I'm no one to talk because I got my load of problems and would like to fix my problems also, but here goes anyway.. :

To the original poster of this thread, I wanted to add to this thread:

1. First, change your login name from thesmallestloser to TheBiggestWinner lol as dumb as that sounds, just do it, you've got to start "shocking" your system into different things. Everytime you log on and read your stuff on this site, it's only gonna remind you that you're thesmallestloser, and obviously, I know you want to get better, otherwise, you wouldn't be going on this site asking for help. So change your name.

1a. Us humans are stuck in a trap called monotony. One reason why our problems continue to exist is because we don't take consistent action to fix it. We continue to think the same, feel, the same, act the same. Therefore, we've got to act differently, as foreign as it feels to our system. Do something small, do it consistently, so you'll get used to it.

1b. I've looked back at some of my problems I used to think were the biggest problems in the world, and looking back, it's really not a big deal. Whether you got problems you're still going to be sitting there breathing and living. Whether you do something now or not, another year, 5, or 10 years will still pass you by whether you do something about it or not. I've heard of people going into depression losing their houses to foreclosure filing bankruptcy, losing their jobs, and families. And they look back, but now they're sitting in a new house with a new porch.

2. You're gonna get a lot of advice; don't let that overwhelm you. Just remember, one step at a time. Pick one small thing, and start on something small, for even 5 minutes.

3. Do you have goals you would like to attain? Be it leisure goals, hobbies, career, personal, family, anything? Work towards those goals. It will get your mind off things, and help you feel better about yourself.

4. You can take your mind off of your own problems, and help others. Is there a cause you believe in, somewhere you can volunteer for a little?

5. I've been depressed before, and I'm telling you diet and exercise contributes (notice I said contribute, not cure) to being the "new natural anti depressant drug."

6. I've heard about that EMT emofree thing before. It's worked for people with allergies too. I'd like to try that myself. I've also always wanted to try hypnotherapy!

7. I haven't really replied in depth to posts on here before, but something told me I should reply to your post. Maybe because it sounded so dire. Not to dampen your day, but you have hope, trust me. A personal story I can share with you because I haven't a clue who you are. But my brother had a horrible case of SA. I saw his SA getting worse and worse by the days weeks months and years. At first it started out as him not liking that people (us family members) looked or stared at him. Then, it got to him getting really wracked up that we looked/stared at him. Then he started putting paper bags on his head. Then he started never leaving his room. Then he couldn't even see people in public. It almost became neurotic/psychotic. His SA was coupled with drug abuse depression etc and then he couldn't take it anymore, and committed suicide. Anybody has more hope than he did.
You have hope because I sense you actually want a way out. You are on the right course, just starting here and writing/asking for help.. GOOD LUCK.

8. Hey get a pet; my little pet cheers me up all the time! Can you move and do something different? Get a change of scenery going?

Start small, do something small, keep at it, and keep looking!

 

[lilcharlie]

ps but don't get a pet if you ain't gonna take care of it and won't love it!

 

[j_brown2]

Ok, so what you are saying is that a social phobic is scared to talk to people because if he finds out he wont be accepted, it means he will be alone, which is his biggest fear. So in order to avoid facing the fact that he will be alone forever he spends his time alone, which is safe for him because there's nobody there to remind him that he will never not be alone? lol Trippy.

All kidding aside, am I following you here or am I missing a piece of it?

And fyi, there's some new EFT stuff that people are using with great results. One technique is called the "choices method" which is similar to using affirmations with EFT. Whereas the traditional way is to tap on the negatives, i.e. "even though I have this issue and nobody likes me and my life sucks, etc..." with the choices method, you tap on the opposite, desired outcome, i.e., "Even though I have this issue, I choose to approach 3 new people a day and say hi, etc."

I agree with what you said here: "he has no excuse for being alone anymore, and the world is not safe to him being alone" In my experience, to "cure" someone you must also give them the tools to feel "safe" amongst others, such as teaching them how to be witty and funny, how to make friends, how to influence others, how to be attractive, etc. And the choices method helps me teach my clients these new behaviors without as much resistance as would normally be there. Check it out. There should be some free articles on it at the emofree site.

Ha ha umm sorry lol my bad... English not my native tongue, so I mixed up feeling lonely and being alone it's not the same

Anyaway I didnt mean it like the way you explained it to yourself lol, but it doesn't matter now

I had 2 theories about SA, one about being alone- which I don't believe that much anymore, so the other one is this

Anxiety takes the form of one emotion that is painful to you, violates a vow, about yourself the world or whatever similar

In my case it's loneliness, when Iam alone I don't feel as lonely as I do around a group of 100 people,

Like I said Iam tapping on past memories and always tap on how lonely I felt, it does the trick, my anxiety goes, tapping on how I was rejected, laughed at doesn't do it for me, but just that tapping on how lonely I felt is enough

Iam doing the personal peace procedure and it's workin for me... I can go out now and wear a shirt that I usually wouldnt dare to wear lol

 

[Jay Cataldo]

Lilcharlie,

Right on brotha. This is all great stuff. You have lost someone to SA (I feel for you) so your words carry just as much weight as anyone's here, if not more.

Fyi I studied hypnotherapy for years and I find EFT to be faster and more efficient in most cases. Plus, learning the basics is free and you can treat yourself. Go download the free manual and see if you like it. If not, let me know where you live and I can try to find you a skilled hypnotherapist in your area. You have to be careful since anyone can take a weekend seminar and call themselves a hypnotist.

Ha ha umm sorry lol my bad... English not my native tongue, so I mixed up feeling lonely and being alone it's not the same

Anyaway I didnt mean it like the way you explained it to yourself lol, but it doesn't matter now

I had 2 theories about SA, one about being alone- which I don't believe that much anymore, so the other one is this

Anxiety takes the form of one emotion that is painful to you, violates a vow, about yourself the world or whatever similar

In my case it's loneliness, when Iam alone I don't feel as lonely as I do around a group of 100 people,

Like I said Iam tapping on past memories and always tap on how lonely I felt, it does the trick, my anxiety goes, tapping on how I was rejected, laughed at doesn't do it for me, but just that tapping on how lonely I felt is enough

Iam doing the personal peace procedure and it's workin for me... I can go out now and wear a shirt that I usually wouldnt dare to wear lol

Hey J, it's cool. Your English is great, man... I was only playin with you.

I think more people will resonate with your new theory. I like it... but I also like your original one and I'm going to test it out and report back. Thanks for the input.

 

[j_brown2]

Lilcharlie,

Right on brotha. This is all great stuff. You have lost someone to SA (I feel for you) so your words carry just as much weight as anyone's here, if not more.

Fyi I studied hypnotherapy for years and I find EFT to be faster and more efficient in most cases. Plus, learning the basics is free and you can treat yourself. Go download the free manual and see if you like it. If not, let me know where you live and I can try to find you a skilled hypnotherapist in your area. You have to be careful since anyone can take a weekend seminar and call themselves a hypnotist.



Hey J, it's cool. Your English is great, man... I was only playin with you.

I think more people will resonate with your new theory. I like it... but I also like your original one and I'm going to test it out and report back. Thanks for the input.

Well the theory about being alone and why someone would rather be years alone then socialize is... if he goes and socializes he will know for sure he can't be accepted, and another thing could be because we humans at the time where dinosaurs lived, we were always in groups, in groups we felt safe like we can survive on our own we were in fear we gonna die... so in this groups of humans there were men and women, so if a guy ****ed up and did something wrong with a women he was scared she is going to tell every women in the group what he did, so every women in this group of humans will know and the women in this group will not want him- he will be alone without a women... In those old times it was rare that someone else would join your group with time, you were pretty much to that group foe life

So another thing why we don't want to try is we are scared everyone will know what **** ups we are. So we will be alone for life, noone will want us.We still act like our ancestors

In a way if you look at guys who are scared of approaching hot girls you can see this theory. I had this epiphany lol when I worked on a memory like this with EFT. Before I tapped with EFT on it, I saw it like my life depended on this one shot, on this one women, if she will reject me Iam ****ed.... later after tapping out just that feeling of how lonely I felt and a bit on fear of being alone... a big cognitive shift! It is weird to describe, in a moment this hot girl didn't see important at all anymore, I thought who cares what she thought of me... there are a 100000 other hit girls out there, like WTF was I thinking?

Haha it made me smile and make me surer then ever that I will get over SA. Once I see there are billion of people out there I can socialize with, (not this one chance only or I will be alone and die or whatever the reason is) I will be over SA.

SA has to do with loneliness or being alone or something in between that... at least in my case, coz it's really working for me

 

[theslowesthand]

"NOWHEER/NOUT ON EARTH seems to "get"/fix my VERY VERY VERY TOTALLY TOTLLY TITALLY unique situation

Hate to burst your bubble, but all of those problems are quite common"

But maybe not as common is:
- having all of these problms at once (ie having a large number of major problems)
- havng the unique set of problms i have (everyones unique, & i'm no exception!; evryone has a certion "set of problems"; i just thnk that my "set" is very rare; )



"Once again, cant afford to see past-life person .. in ideal world EVERY person on earth would have easy accesss to such therpay/knwoledge .. in past have felt (for real!) that was reincarnition of really relaly bad person such as Hitelr "

"Complete bullshit. You don't believe in religion but you'll buy into this superstitious nonsense?"

In other words: i dont go to chrch, i dont belong to any "religion" (although i "religiosly" follow my own systm of living), i kind of (~~70%) belief in past lives / reincanation (is such believes regaded as "religin"? -> i tend to label as "new age stuff")



"You hate exercise? Here's a solution: DO IT ANYWAY!"

My curent vrsion of my "system" is sucesfully geting me to do "exercise" on most days now (but only just walkling around, getting outside, doing basic outside activiivtes - rarely to i do anythng to get heartrate up (ie cardivasculr)) - wrking on it



"Sometimes we need to be hard on ourselves to get out of a rut"

I'm VERY hard on myself, with things i say to self (con & sub), workaholism, not allowing myslf to have a soacial life (or to enjoy life). But in othr areas im very "slack"/lax (eg not pushing self to get a socil life)



"Until you're willing to start changing, you won't change"

I want to (when desprate) remedy certain thngs, but am scared of change (is a phobia of mine - i can barely chnge a thing in house without getting "upset"/etc). So i do want to chnage certain things, but really i dont wnt to chnge anythng else in order to chnge them (if that makes snse)

 

[hedgemaster1]

Wow! you guys...remember that in life that we are all here for a reason! Stop looking for all the bad things in life, and start tomorrow fresh! Wallowing in your own self absorbed pity will get you no where. So were all not perfect...who cares? Are we having a competition anyway? Even the most beautifull people are flawed, maybe you just can't see it on their outside. Everyone hides things inside...we all do it. Take all the good things about your life, even if they are small and leave the rest in the garbage!

 

[theslowesthand]

about being alone..

i like/prefer being alone, as that is the only truly safe place in this world for me. i tempoary "forget" about the Fs of loneliness/rejectin/unsafety/etc that being in compny "provides", & i feel accepted by world, although is based on fooling myslf via isolation from dircet human contct
i prefer alonesness (& even lonelinss) to compnay
i'm at my hapiest when alone
i'm not scared to be alone - im scared of not being alone

"Ok, so what you are saying is that a social phobic is scared to talk to people because if he finds out he wont be accepted, it means he will be alone, which is his biggest fear. So in order to avoid facing the fact that he will be alone forever he spends his time alone, which is safe for him because there's nobody there to remind him that he will never not be alone?"

Maybe "not being acceptabed" --> leads to --> conscoius thoghts that am alone --> feelngs of lonelyness?

Is "his" bigsest fear is actualy the feelings of loneliness?

Is loneleiness = feel will be alone for eternty??

 

[j_brown2]

All I can say is the feeling of loneliness causes me anxiety, I learned today feeling lonely or being alone is not the same.

I know that I don't feel lonely in my own room despite being in it for most of the time... As soon as I leave the house I feel so lonely I guess that it's causing me anxiety,

It makes sense why I don't want to be around people... I feel so closed of, like I can't connect with people... it just fuels my loneliness being around people

I can talk with my mother about everything, I don't feel lonely around her so I have no anxiety
Around my father I do feel lonely manytimes from childhood on from his abuse, I always tried to please him, coz I didn't want to feel this lonely I guess when he critisezed me and that shit

 

[theslowesthand]

"thesmallestloser ..... TheBiggestWinner"

Reminds me of what inspird my name - the tv show "The Biggest Loser"


"Do you have goals you would like to attain? Be it leisure goals, hobbies, career, personal, family, anything? Work towards those goals. It will get your mind off things, and help you feel better about yourself"

Yes. I have goals coming out of my ears - way too many. But use them (on computer) as a good way to escape life/shit


"I've been depressed before, and I'm telling you diet and exercise contributes (notice I said contribute, not cure) to being the "new natural anti depressant drug"

Im actually not depressed at all, nor was i then, but just feeling like my life is fcked (so maybe hopelessness?), & was in "heat" of days people-events
(i stated this thread after being abroad that day (my now was fcked then, but ive recoverd now)
I agree with that


"I've also always wanted to try hypnotherapy!"

Ditto, but am also scred of how it will change my brian


"Maybe because it sounded so dire"

Mate, im actually in best place ive been in my life. I do have thsi knack for making things seem much wrse than they are (probbly due to my extreme negtivity). All this b*shit is NOTHING compred to what ive been threw before. Been here a 1000 times. Been in "places" X10 worse

I dont thnk i want peopel to "worry" abut me .. i not going to top myslf (very unfrtnately for me, i have a very strong will to live!)


"Not to dampen your day, but you have hope, trust me"

Yes, but sometmes i wish didnt have this hope, as keeps me alive
& the hope sems pointless (all it does, year-in-year-out, is make me FEEL hopelful in the NOW .. nout ever changes in future .. but guess that the only improtant thing is the now-momnt)
So guess false hope "better" than no hope at all???


"Get a pet"

Wont get pet (as death of it affcts me too badly)
But my "pets" are inscts/animals in wild (which to me never "die" (cont replaced/refreshed); & dont get as attached to)


"Can you move and do something different? Get a change of scenery going?"

Stuck where am for various reasons (good & bad)



"Start small, do something small, keep at it, and keep looking!"

I thnk that a key for me as im a "stop-start" kind of guy. Start thngs, but seldom end/complete/continue thngs. Tha could explain my failure in a # areas of life

 

[Havocan]

The last social gathering I went to, I was standing around the chips and salsa.
And all of the sudden a bunch of people came and crowded around to eat some also.
I tried thinking of some conversation to strike up, and I ended up telling them why nixtamalized corn is infinitely better than regular untreated corn.
After I was done, they all just walked away. No numbers, no nothin.
*rain pours down*

That sounds like me, except I'd probably be too shy to even tell them that. Maybe if they'd said something or made a comment about the food. I also spent most of my childhood inside reading books, mostly encyclopedias and geographical books^^.

Would be nice to find someone who'd not just scoff at that knowledge.

 

[Jay Cataldo]

Well the theory about being alone and why someone would rather be years alone then socialize is... if he goes and socializes he will know for sure he can't be accepted, and another thing could be because we humans at the time where dinosaurs lived, we were always in groups, in groups we felt safe like we can survive on our own we were in fear we gonna die... so in this groups of humans there were men and women, so if a guy ****ed up and did something wrong with a women he was scared she is going to tell every women in the group what he did, so every women in this group of humans will know and the women in this group will not want him- he will be alone without a women... In those old times it was rare that someone else would join your group with time, you were pretty much to that group foe life

So another thing why we don't want to try is we are scared everyone will know what **** ups we are. So we will be alone for life, noone will want us.We still act like our ancestors

In a way if you look at guys who are scared of approaching hot girls you can see this theory. I had this epiphany lol when I worked on a memory like this with EFT. Before I tapped with EFT on it, I saw it like my life depended on this one shot, on this one women, if she will reject me Iam ****ed.... later after tapping out just that feeling of how lonely I felt and a bit on fear of being alone... a big cognitive shift! It is weird to describe, in a moment this hot girl didn't see important at all anymore, I thought who cares what she thought of me... there are a 100000 other hit girls out there, like WTF was I thinking?

Haha it made me smile and make me surer then ever that I will get over SA. Once I see there are billion of people out there I can socialize with, (not this one chance only or I will be alone and die or whatever the reason is) I will be over SA.

SA has to do with loneliness or being alone or something in between that... at least in my case, coz it's really working for me

It sounds like you've spent a lot of time on the PUA boards. ::

I think that in order to get over your fear of being alone, you need to believe that you are socially valuable, i.e. that you have something to offer people whether it's good conversation, knowledge or even just good energy from your mere presence. Have you been working on yourself in this area?

Let me know where you're stuck and I can give you some exercises to help you move on to the next stage.

 

[Jay Cataldo]

"thesmallestloser ..... TheBiggestWinner"

Reminds me of what inspird my name - the tv show "The Biggest Loser"


"Do you have goals you would like to attain? Be it leisure goals, hobbies, career, personal, family, anything? Work towards those goals. It will get your mind off things, and help you feel better about yourself"

Yes. I have goals coming out of my ears - way too many. But use them (on computer) as a good way to escape life/shit


"I've been depressed before, and I'm telling you diet and exercise contributes (notice I said contribute, not cure) to being the "new natural anti depressant drug"

Im actually not depressed at all, nor was i then, but just feeling like my life is fcked (so maybe hopelessness?), & was in "heat" of days people-events
(i stated this thread after being abroad that day (my now was fcked then, but ive recoverd now)
I agree with that


"I've also always wanted to try hypnotherapy!"

Ditto, but am also scred of how it will change my brian


"Maybe because it sounded so dire"

Mate, im actually in best place ive been in my life. I do have thsi knack for making things seem much wrse than they are (probbly due to my extreme negtivity). All this b*shit is NOTHING compred to what ive been threw before. Been here a 1000 times. Been in "places" X10 worse

I dont thnk i want peopel to "worry" abut me .. i not going to top myslf (very unfrtnately for me, i have a very strong will to live!)


"Not to dampen your day, but you have hope, trust me"

Yes, but sometmes i wish didnt have this hope, as keeps me alive
& the hope sems pointless (all it does, year-in-year-out, is make me FEEL hopelful in the NOW .. nout ever changes in future .. but guess that the only improtant thing is the now-momnt)
So guess false hope "better" than no hope at all???


"Get a pet"

Wont get pet (as death of it affcts me too badly)
But my "pets" are inscts/animals in wild (which to me never "die" (cont replaced/refreshed); & dont get as attached to)


"Can you move and do something different? Get a change of scenery going?"

Stuck where am for various reasons (good & bad)



"Start small, do something small, keep at it, and keep looking!"

I thnk that a key for me as im a "stop-start" kind of guy. Start thngs, but seldom end/complete/continue thngs. Tha could explain my failure in a # areas of life

I take it you didn't go run your 3 miles.

Bro, you have mastered the art of giving excuses. Do you really want to change or not? The brain absolutely HATES change because change can be a threat to survival so your mind fights you tooth and nail every time you introduce something new into your daily routine. This is NORMAL. If you want to be successful, you need to push yourself through the resistance.

Check this guy out: Sean Stephenson

He's 3 feet tall and in a f-in wheelchair for christ's sake and he aint whining! He should be your role model.

Btw, excessive whining is a learned behavior just like anything else. So if you can learn how to whine and complain and make excuses, you can learn how to become successful despite whatever perceived flaws you have. 3 feet tall... and in a wheelchair!

That sounds like me, except I'd probably be too shy to even tell them that. Maybe if they'd said something or made a comment about the food. I also spent most of my childhood inside reading books, mostly encyclopedias and geographical books^^.

Would be nice to find someone who'd not just scoff at that knowledge.

Havocan, it's all in the delivery. If you're shy and nervous about sharing what's on your mind, even the most fascinating material will fall flat. If you add some passion into the mix and make whatever you're talking about sound cool, it's real easy to captivate an audience.

 

[j_brown2]

It sounds like you've spent a lot of time on the PUA boards. ::

I think that in order to get over your fear of being alone, you need to believe that you are socially valuable, i.e. that you have something to offer people whether it's good conversation, knowledge or even just good energy from your mere presence. Have you been working on yourself in this area?

Let me know where you're stuck and I can give you some exercises to help you move on to the next stage.

No I haven't really much, Iam not into that. This is not important lol.Well what can I say, I think Iam good for now, I am tapping with EFT everyday all day, Iam erasing every single negative memory I ever had... I know Iam hardcore, locked in my room since 27 November 08, and rarely go out... well hard work pays off, 3 quarters of my life are tapped out, only 1 quarter left... And what Iam realizing is when I tap away all the junk, the fears... All my good qualities come out automatically, stuff like being talkactive, assertive, having a higher value of yourself... so I think Iam sweet, just gotta keep on tapping,

 

[Jay Cataldo]

No I haven't really much, Iam not into that. This is not important lol.Well what can I say, I think Iam good for now, I am tapping with EFT everyday all day, Iam erasing every single negative memory I ever had... I know Iam hardcore, locked in my room since 27 November 08, and rarely go out... well hard work pays off, 3 quarters of my life are tapped out, only 1 quarter left... And what Iam realizing is when I tap away all the junk, the fears... All my good qualities come out automatically, stuff like being talkactive, assertive, having a higher value of yourself... so I think Iam sweet, just gotta keep on tapping,

I was talking about your reference to tribal customs and inbred fears of being expelled from a community. Mystery's been harping on that crap for close to ten years now and it's like nails on a chalkboard to me.

I think it's great that you're tapping away. I would also suggest you work on slowly acclimating yourself to society once again, otherwise, when you finally decide to leave your room for good, it may be too jarring to do it in one shot. Even something as simple as taking your laptop to starbucks instead of sitting home online will slowly help you get used to being around people. After that you can make it your mission to compliment three people a day in passing and progress from there. Baby steps.

 

[Havocan]

Havocan, it's all in the delivery. If you're shy and nervous about sharing what's on your mind, even the most fascinating material will fall flat. If you add some passion into the mix and make whatever you're talking about sound cool, it's real easy to captivate an audience.

Good point. However I'd like to see people laugh out of joy/happiness with a non-condescending tone when I tell them the fundamental differences between arachnids and insects .