Section_31
Well-known member
so today, i just woke up feeling like crap.
No not sick. just really depressed. I think it started last night right before bed actually. My wife was being realy quiet and just looked like she was thinking about somthing deep, and not a pleasant somthing. So i asked her what was wrong, she said nothing, rolled over and went to sleep. Not one to push, i did the same, figuring she would tell me when she felt ready.
So then, in the middle of the night i wake up because shes no longer beside me. I can never stay asleep when she isnt there, so whatever, i figured she had gotten up to use the bathroom or somthing, and i can hear some quiet crying coming from upstairs (our bedroom is in the basement).
So i go up, wondering whats up now. I ask if shes ok and she clams up and says shes fine, which is a typical thing she does when shes upset. Getting her to talk about whatevers bothering her is about akin to pulling teeth.
So instead i bring her a glass of juice, throw a blanket in the drier for 5 minutes and come back upstairs and wrap her up in it. Seemed to calm her down a little more. I didnt say anything, just stayed there with her, and FINALLY she gets it out, that she was just feeling hopeless about her job situation, or lack of. Sh es graduating this spring, with her 2nd degree and has no idea what she can do with either of her degree's. Thing is, shes REALLY good at primate anthropology, which is what she got her 2nd degree in. Problem is, we live in canada. not exactly alot of primates here. And of course her parents have been really digging into her about this, and really not being helpful at all. We would try to talk to them when they ask, and j*sus, her dads gets on the "you probably arent living right" bandwagon, and then tries to pray everything away.
Ok, im goign to pull an Obama thing here, "Let me be clear!". Im christian, im good for t hat sort of thing, but issues like these arent going to be prayed away, and i wish in this case the ol FIL would just drop it already and see reality for what it is.....ok, anyways.
So anyway, i just let her get it out of her system. I didnt have any answers for her problem, and i felt so bad for her because i love her so much, and it really hurt me to see her in this kind of pain. I wanted to change the world just so it wouldnt hurt her anymore...
I asked if she wanted to come back to bed and she said shed like to just stay up and read for a bit, so i left her alone. I went back to bed and did my best to try to sleep.
I have to admit, after every episode like this i find myself so exhausted, especially emotionally. I have to be really tactful in how i get her to talk about things otherwise it turns into a full blown fight, and im NOT a fighter. SO, yea, last night, i felt pretty sad, and i woke up this morning feeling rested but really not much better.
mi keeping in perspective that our living situation isnt going to be this way forever, just for the next 2 yrs, or at least untill she finds work of some kind or i get a raise, in which case i might be able to pay off my debt faster so we'll be able to be on our own and supporting ourselves....
Overall, just a very depressing night. This morning i really feel no drive at all. Im in my office, i have about 12 computers i need to get through today, and i havnt even started.
Stick a fork in me, im done.
No not sick. just really depressed. I think it started last night right before bed actually. My wife was being realy quiet and just looked like she was thinking about somthing deep, and not a pleasant somthing. So i asked her what was wrong, she said nothing, rolled over and went to sleep. Not one to push, i did the same, figuring she would tell me when she felt ready.
So then, in the middle of the night i wake up because shes no longer beside me. I can never stay asleep when she isnt there, so whatever, i figured she had gotten up to use the bathroom or somthing, and i can hear some quiet crying coming from upstairs (our bedroom is in the basement).
So i go up, wondering whats up now. I ask if shes ok and she clams up and says shes fine, which is a typical thing she does when shes upset. Getting her to talk about whatevers bothering her is about akin to pulling teeth.
So instead i bring her a glass of juice, throw a blanket in the drier for 5 minutes and come back upstairs and wrap her up in it. Seemed to calm her down a little more. I didnt say anything, just stayed there with her, and FINALLY she gets it out, that she was just feeling hopeless about her job situation, or lack of. Sh es graduating this spring, with her 2nd degree and has no idea what she can do with either of her degree's. Thing is, shes REALLY good at primate anthropology, which is what she got her 2nd degree in. Problem is, we live in canada. not exactly alot of primates here. And of course her parents have been really digging into her about this, and really not being helpful at all. We would try to talk to them when they ask, and j*sus, her dads gets on the "you probably arent living right" bandwagon, and then tries to pray everything away.
Ok, im goign to pull an Obama thing here, "Let me be clear!". Im christian, im good for t hat sort of thing, but issues like these arent going to be prayed away, and i wish in this case the ol FIL would just drop it already and see reality for what it is.....ok, anyways.
So anyway, i just let her get it out of her system. I didnt have any answers for her problem, and i felt so bad for her because i love her so much, and it really hurt me to see her in this kind of pain. I wanted to change the world just so it wouldnt hurt her anymore...
I asked if she wanted to come back to bed and she said shed like to just stay up and read for a bit, so i left her alone. I went back to bed and did my best to try to sleep.
I have to admit, after every episode like this i find myself so exhausted, especially emotionally. I have to be really tactful in how i get her to talk about things otherwise it turns into a full blown fight, and im NOT a fighter. SO, yea, last night, i felt pretty sad, and i woke up this morning feeling rested but really not much better.
mi keeping in perspective that our living situation isnt going to be this way forever, just for the next 2 yrs, or at least untill she finds work of some kind or i get a raise, in which case i might be able to pay off my debt faster so we'll be able to be on our own and supporting ourselves....
Overall, just a very depressing night. This morning i really feel no drive at all. Im in my office, i have about 12 computers i need to get through today, and i havnt even started.
Stick a fork in me, im done.
