IF YOU DID NOT HAVE SA, WOULD YOU FIT IN?

[Lonelyheart]

I think that part of the reason why I have SA is because my beliefs and personallity characteristics differ from the majority of the population. I think that even if I didn't have anxiety I would have a difficult time fitting in.

I'm not the stereotypical man

For example:

I think love is much more important than sex.
I don't watch football.
I think a player is a male-slut.
I think lovely ladies are at least equal if not superior to men.
I like love songs and classical more than violent, hateful music.
I appreciate facial beauty much more than sexually explicit acts.
I think hardcore pornography is disgusting.
I don't care much about having male friends.
I value monogamy and discourage promiscuity.
I have no desire to engage in unloving, random fornication.
I don't like going to parties or clubs (even if I didn't have SA).
I'm quiet.
I'm studious.

These are a few characteristics of my personality that are not found in the stereotypical male. I think these differences would make it difficult for me to fit in even if I did not have SA. In fact, I think that these differences could have caused my SA.

Some of my personality characteristics are effeminate; however, I am definitely NOT homosexual. If anything, I might be too heterosexual. I like extremely feminine ladies (sweet, petite, shy, soft-spoken, adorable, lovable, innocent, kind, compassionate, caring, etc.), and I think about lovely ladies constantly.

 

[Erythrocyte]

Honey, I think I'm in love with you .

Damn, that was going to be my line... 8)

 

[Lonelyheart]

Honey, I think I'm in love with you .

Damn, that was going to be my line... 8)

Thank you littlematchgirl and Erythrocyte. That's one of the nicest things anyone has ever said to me. I've never had a girlfriend; as a result, it's nice to know that there are ladies who appreciate my soft-hearted disposition.

 

[Lonelyheart]

My soft-heartedness only applies to ladies, and this joke.....

Is not that you're not a stereotypical man,I think you're just a woman with a man-gina! Haha,what a crappy joke...

is both offensive and inappropriate so.....

Fuck You Ozkr!!

I vist this forum in hopes of receiving support not ridicule. If I wanted to be ridiculed I would speak freely amongst "normal" people in the real world. I think many of us visit this forum because it is one of the few places where we can be ourselves and still be accepted.

 

[ozkr]

My soft-heartedness only applies to ladies, and this joke.....

Is not that you're not a stereotypical man,I think you're just a woman with a man-gina! Haha,what a crappy joke...

is both offensive and inappropriate so.....

Fuck You Ozkr!!

I vist this forum in hopes of receiving support not ridicule. If I wanted to be ridiculed I would speak freely amongst "normal" people in the real world. I think many of us visit this forum because it is one of the few places where we can be ourselves and still be accepted.

I'm really sorry man. Based on the way you describe yourself I should have understood you might not take the joke I would have taken it. Seriously, I don't really know why it made sense in my head. I understand it was offensive and I know I shouldn't have used that term. My intention was not to ridiculize you.

 

[Lonelyheart]

My soft-heartedness only applies to ladies, and this joke.....

Is not that you're not a stereotypical man,I think you're just a woman with a man-gina! Haha,what a crappy joke...

is both offensive and inappropriate so.....

Fuck You Ozkr!!

I vist this forum in hopes of receiving support not ridicule. If I wanted to be ridiculed I would speak freely amongst "normal" people in the real world. I think many of us visit this forum because it is one of the few places where we can be ourselves and still be accepted.

I'm really sorry man. Based on the way you describe yourself I should have understood you might not take the joke I would have taken it. Seriously, I don't really know why it made sense in my head. I understand it was offensive and I know I shouldn't have used that term. My intention was not to ridiculize you.

Apology accepted

 

[moodygoo]

Honey, I think I'm in love with you .

Damn, that was going to be my line... 8)

Thank you littlematchgirl and Erythrocyte. That's one of the nicest things anyone has ever said to me. I've never had a girlfriend; as a result, it's nice to know that there are ladies who appreciate my soft-hearted disposition.

Can I join the fan club? :wink:

Anyway I think theres plenty of people like that (at least I hope so) but how much of a variety of people do you come into contact with? I've not answered the poll because I can't say. There are some strange people out there with no self consciousness whatsoever yet still they have friends and comrades galour- just through being pleasant company I guess.

 

[Lonelyheart]

:wink:

Hey my keyboard wasnt working so i had to send those emoticon things...
i wanted to say

flip where do you live ...could you be the one man that proves that all men are not the same

8O marry me......take me in your arms and make me complete :wink:

8O 8O 8O WOW, I seriously had no idea that a lady could potentially love a man like myself. The responses I've receive from this topic are such a surprise. In my neighborhood, it's always the loud-mouthed players who attract the girls (even the one's who are shy and nice). Thank you and everyone else who made nice post for making me realize that there are ladies out there who like soft-hearted men. I was seriously starting to think I would be alone forever. I guess I should consider trying harder to expressing my true feelings and beliefs in real life too.

Cutefluffykitten, Thank you for the kind words. I live in California.

 

[scatmantom]

I have anxiety problems but I already fit in. So i answered yes. Social Phobia doesnt mean u can't fit in, it just makes it more difficult to socialise comfortably.

 

[maggie]

I have anxiety problems but I already fit in. So i answered yes. Social Phobia doesnt mean u can't fit in, it just makes it more difficult to socialise comfortably.

i agree with scatmantom..i wouldn't so much change what i'm doing, but would feel more comfortable doing it :wink:

 

[Tryin]

what does it mean to fit in? to not differ from other people? to be what is considered normal? i don't want to. :roll:

 

[maggie]

what does it mean to fit in? to not differ from other people? to be what is considered normal? i don't want to. :roll:

i agree Tryin...i don't always mind being the way i am..being the odd one..a little different than everyone else, cause "normal" or whatever normal is considered to be, doesn't necessarily mean better :wink:

 

[red_reagel]

Yes, I think you would. People always do silly or weird things that shows they aren't afraid to be themselves. So, other people around them respect that and enjoy having those type of people around.

 

[Screwdriver1020]

fdsafweafsdfasdfasd

 

[chear15]

I think I would fit in, as I already kind of do, many nice cool people try to talk to me. I just have a hard time fitting in with them because I am to damn shy and parnoid of what they think. I am way to sensitive as well, and I am a guy. I am a sports fanatic though, playing and watching so I fit in with those people just hard to relate when I have SP. I am way to nice to everyone, will do anything to make them happy plus more. Damn that sucks.

 

[red_reagel]

I think I would fit in, as I already kind of do, many nice cool people try to talk to me. I just have a hard time fitting in with them because I am to damn shy and parnoid of what they think. I am way to sensitive as well, and I am a guy. I am a sports fanatic though, playing and watching so I fit in with those people just hard to relate when I have SP. I am way to nice to everyone, will do anything to make them happy plus more. Damn that sucks.

Yeah, doesn't that suck? I have that same problem too. Like in my spanish this girl always takes advantage of me and pokes me in the back to help her. She doesn't even ask for my name or anything. The more nice I am, the more everybody hurts me. I mean in Jr. High that is, and still today nobody gives a damn about me.

 

[redlady]

I would fit in - somewhere. Within this silent vessel there is a person of interest that could easily get on with people if she wasn't so scared.

 

[qipuqipu]

My soft-heartedness only applies to ladies

That makes me sad.

You led this topic off by saying that you're not the typical man - and then you go and discriminate against all men.

Sorry to nitpick, but I couldn't ignore this point.

 

[Lonelyheart]

My soft-heartedness only applies to ladies

That makes me sad.

You led this topic off by saying that you're not the typical man - and then you go and discriminate against all men.

Sorry to nitpick, but I couldn't ignore this point.

I can be nice to men too, but not in the same way. I tend to be much more compassionate and gentle toward ladies (respectable women). For example, if a lady does something that upsets me, I will NOT respond with hostility, but if a man upsets me I will sometimes respond with verbal hostility or even physical force. I will NEVER use physical force against a lady. If a lady upsets me, I get sad. If a man upsets me, I get angry.

I'm sure you have noticed that I often use the word lady. Every woman is not a lady, just as every man is not a gentleman... So when I say things about how much I love and respect ladies, I definitely NOT referring to all women. In addition, when I say things about disliking stereotypical men, I'm definitely NOT refering to all men.

 

[Higolo]

I believe so, yes.