I really hate this...

[sanitariumcalls]

I'll be honest, I can't afford a doc. I have Medicare and Medicaid for the copays, and prescription coverage BUT no shrink near me who actually accepts my insurance (all 4 of them in the Oly/Lacey area) and does not specialize for seniors, isn't accepting new patients right now...

And my bipolar is officially out of remission and in full swing, after 5 years of damn near no problems what so ever. The alternative therapy I practice, yeah, it ain't really working anymore...

I just skipped class, my favorite one, for the 2nd time and its only the 2nd week of the quarter... I love that class! I love going to school! I'm a happy person for God's sake, but I seriously about had a complete meltdown, in public, waiting for my class to start.

So I left and came home to hide in my room with my laptop and my cats...

I don't know what to do now. I'm not suicidal, I don't want to hurt myself, but I am so deep in the abyss I feel like I'm drowning in my own lack of serotonin...

Can anyone relate? Can anyone help? Advice? Pills? LOL jk on that last one...

Seriously, I feel ridiculous... but I hate this and I need some help...

 

[Feathers]

Hey, I'm bipolar-ish too (not diagnosed, never been to docs for this..) and just try to tweak it with nutrition/lifestyle..

Need to stay away from sugar or even any too sweet juices or fruit... Best to eat something more 'stable' like proteins or such.. Can you eat an egg? (Tryptophan.) Or any other foods that are serotonin-rich? (Check Wikipedia.) also exercise, walking in sunlight if possible..
I also avoid caffeine, alcohol, etc.

What have you been eating, if anything? Seriously.

Have you done any CBT? The Feeling Good Workbook by Dr David Burns recommended.

What kind of alternative therapy did you practice too, if I might ask?

 

[sanitariumcalls]

Actually I'm eating better than I was for the past 5 years, lots of veggies, limited myself to a couple sodas a week if any, cut red meat out of my diet except maximum once a month (my partner eats it, so yeah) I have a chocolate addiction but I don't over indulge that often.

Alternative therapy thus far: acupuncture, prayer, meditation, journaling, tai chi, gardening

I haven't gotten into the herbal remedies because I don't wanna take something I may have a bad reaction to (sensitive stomach)

No idea what CBT is...

I found a Sea Mar clinic about 20 miles away on a bus line, maybe I should call them...