I thought you have a bf? Don't you talk to him often?
Same situation as me. I just spend my days on my computer posting here, playing games, or listening to music but I realized that I've wasted enough time in my life. I also realized that there's no way that I'll be like this forever, I mean come on life is way too short so why do I have to be like this? I know myself that I have to change- I have to.
I'm 19 now and I feel very empty. Sometimes I think about what I can do if I didn't have this fear. I know that I can do it, it's just that my mind goes automatic and I cannot control it. You know what I mean right? It's so hard because it's mental. Mental problem is the worst problem a person could have IMO. I wish I had a different problem.
So I still go to my computer often but now I also listen to my NLP mp3 that I found. It's really helpful. Day by day, it seems that my mind is thinking much better. Plus my brother just arrived and he had to live with us and we had to share rooms. I'm the kind of person who's used to have roommates so I just mostly just listen to that mp3 in the living room or somewhere quiet. I'm on my computer now because they went somewhere.
The most important thing that I learned in life is that you need to live your life like every moment counts or you'll regret it. We're just not aware that every seconds every day that we're not taking actions, we're wasting time and that time cannot be brought back. Instead of feeling sorry, why not just use that time for something usefull? Maybe clean your house or something or keep looking for a cure and who knows, something might work for you.
Seize the day.
Ya always welcome to come and spk to me on msn ya know.. I know that wont magicaly fix your problems but if you just need to vent or anything.Ive missed ya since ya buggered off on ya holidays.Hope you enjoyed them tho?Must maybe feel hard coming back to every day life,but maybe being forced into college (even tho i dont agree with someone being forced) might be just what you need,to be around people your own age and stuff and just feel good about yaself because ya doing somthing constructive.Thats how i felt when i was at college.You did so well with work despite that official nob jockey of a manager so i have faith ya can cope wid college.
