I feel so bad...

no1

Banned
I'm sick to my stomach. I feel like I'll be like this forever.

I have no experience in anything... I am pretty boring. I have not been around, I don't know what to do, I dont know how to have fun, what to say, how to act, where to go.

Compared to other guys, how on earth can I ever find a date?

I can't even ask questions about these things because people look at me like I've lost all common sense but it IS true, I DON'T have common sense.

I wish someone could just help me out on this instead of thinking I'm just some kind of loser, or good for nothing. Or become disinterested or disgusted in me.

Today at school.. I couldn't even concentrate. The same images of a long arduous, and lonely life kept replaying over and over again in my head.

I felt physically sick to my stomach, and felt like perhaps I am meant to not exist. Like... my body or I am in overdrive, I should be dead, or I am meant to live a hard cold brutal existence, with no help whatsoever, and live alone, and be alone, with nobody to be by my side to tell me its ok, or to stick with me, or help me as I get over this. I just can't if I am alone all the time.

I need someone, I need a life, but I can't do that without anyone by my side... it'll be too much work and no reward. It's just... I need a life but I can't get one without anyone, without any help.

I'm so ****in sad. I just walked out of class, angry. I felt like flipping out and running off the ledge of a tall building.
 
I need someone, I need a life, but I can't do that without anyone by my side... it'll be too much work and no reward. It's just... I need a life but I can't get one without anyone, without any help.

I'm so ****in sad. I just walked out of class, angry. I felt like flipping out and running off the ledge of a tall building.

Hey no1, it sucks when you fall down a hole like that. But that doesn't define you. Other people usually can't see the person past the symptoms, cause they haven't been there. If everybody went through depressions like that then they would be more empathetic.

And unfortunately there are a lot of differences between the sexes in regard to dating - I used to think there would be a mirror of me in a girl somewhere. But really, it's been imaginary girlfriends who have kept me sane over the years (or is that by definition insane? :/). Of course, this was before the internet, so things may be a bit better nowadays. But really, it's a catch-22 - most girls don't want to have to help a person through their problems, so you have to get better before you can have a girlfriend. That's been my experience anyway.

If nothing else, think of how much better meds they'll have in the future - gives me a reason to hang on through the bad times. So keep hanging in there - someday it'll be better.
 

Anubis

Well-known member
You don't like yourself enough if the only way you can enjoy life if someone else likes you. That's really your problem. It's not about other people not finding you attractive enough. It's about YOU not finding yourself worthwhile and attractive enough.

And I know you probably heard that a million times, but as a person who has recently overcome SA, I can't tell you how true it is. Most interpersonal problems are actually personal. Once you cure yourself, everything else is cured.

My suggestion would be to identify your insecurity and work day and night to find the appropriate resources to improve it. Read books, listen to tapes, ASK non-SA friends. Anything! One of them is bound to give you the information you need (for me, it took finally getting the nerve to ask my non-SA friend how he views the world). Again, once you fix your inner-self, everything else is fixed by definition because your inner-self defines your world. Trust me!
 

DaaaBulls

Well-known member
Dude to be really honest you've got to stop whining and moaning and get out there and start doing stuff. What is writing on social phobia going to do for your experiences. Go join a gym and start practicing playing basketball, go take a class at a community college, go do something. We all have problems, even people who appear like they don't, it's just how we deal with those problems that makes people different. No one or thing is going to make YOU happy. That is something that you have to do yourself. Stop looking for someone to take your pain away, do it yourself. You need a push, go see a therapist who will push you to start accomplishing some goals. Talk is cheap my friend, do something about it.
 

no1

Banned
Dude to be really honest you've got to stop whining and moaning and get out there and start doing stuff. What is writing on social phobia going to do for your experiences. Go join a gym and start practicing playing basketball, go take a class at a community college, go do something. We all have problems, even people who appear like they don't, it's just how we deal with those problems that makes people different. No one or thing is going to make YOU happy. That is something that you have to do yourself. Stop looking for someone to take your pain away, do it yourself. You need a push,
go see a therapist who will push you to start accomplishing some goals. Talk is cheap my friend, do something about it.

I do go to the gym. I do take classes in college. I dont play basketball though.
 
Top