How is shyness viewed in your country?

peacegrrl

Active member
I don't know about anyone else, but I've found that non-Caucasian communities in Australia are significantly more tolerant of shy and socially awkward people than most white Australians.

Whether this is due to their general cultural behaviour, or because they're more reserved with people from different races, or something else. I'm not sure. When it comes to something like employment, an Asian-Australian manager is probably more concerned with if you can get the job done rather than your people skillz (although, yeah, the latter is always a plus).

Just wanted to point out my un-racist observation. :D
 

Zav

Well-known member
I had a pretty hard time when i visited Armenia a few years back as the people there are very warm and welcoming and mostly extroverted, the older women were kind of mothering me and lavishing me with food and i'm not used to that amount of attention. I felt conscious as i was probably the only British person around too lol.

Oh man, just imagine being a shy Armenian. It's torture for me at large family/church gatherings!
 

mysissucks

Well-known member
USA-I wish it wasn't so competitive here. Arrogance and "success" are valued over humility and kindness. I put "success" in quotations b/c I don't agree with the overall definition of it in this country. This leads to the problem of why shyness is stigmatized, in my opinion.
 

Zav

Well-known member
USA-I wish it wasn't so competitive here. Arrogance and "success" are valued over humility and kindness. I put "success" in quotations b/c I don't agree with the overall definition of it in this country. This leads to the problem of why shyness is stigmatized, in my opinion.

Totally agreed.
 

Lenna C

Member
My country has been gone through a long period of transition (from socialism to capitalism). First, capitalism as a system, can be ruthless. It can be a real suffering for an introvert and idealist to live by market laws. By these laws, shyness and similar characteristics are just unnecessary obstacles to competitiveness and success. But, situation is even worse because we don't have strong institutions, we can say that still the law of stronger rules, actually. Shyness is considered as a weakness, of course. A few decades ago it wasn't so bad for someone to be shy, but now it is a suffering even for a girl or woman. Such persons usually are just brushed aside, often misunderstood either at work or in relationships. Rare are those who, being shy to a large extent, can find a really good job, understanding friends or partners in big cities. If you're a little older, if you're more than 25 or 30 yrs old, people just don't believe that you still can be shy. But, if you suffer from generalised social anxiety or AvPD like me, they think you are mentally retarded or something like that and it's sometimes very difficult to deal with.
 
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mrb

Well-known member
In England shyness is not seen as too bad a thing, we are not keen on extroverts. Loud people are frowned upon.

We are almost brought up that way
"little children should be seen and not heard"

oi was that last bit a dig at me :eek:
 

KiaKaha

Banned
In New Zealand, I think its looked upon as weak. I dont think anyone here wants to be thought of as shy because it conveys a lack of confidence, as well as being difficult to be around. I am trying to find a job at the moment and all the adverts want "people persons" with good communication skills etc etc...everything that I dont have....

I feel its particularly difficult being shy here, especially if you are male.
NZ culture is an extroverted one, and the socially anxious are at a disadvantage because of it.
 
In my personal age group, it could be better. But it'll grow more accepted as I age. ^W^

It could be far worse, I've heard stories of guys from Latin countries where pretty much all males compete quite vividly with one another. I wouldn't be able to keep up with all that. :S
 

iason

Well-known member
Wow good question.
Well Italy, despite the uniform typical image that somehow we give (and also ourselves Italian often live this stereotype: the Italian as always sociable, excited, extrovert, etc.) is a country which has a society and customs very, very diverse from a region to another, so it is difficult to take a general assumption in this matter. Yet trying to generalise, shyness is viewed as odd, sometimes even with "suspect", as something weird, especially amongst men and especially amongst the young (18-35 yo) middle-lower classes, wich are generally more uniform to the typical Latin muddler picture.
But it is to say that in some places, as in the more rural realities or in the north, and moreover in the northern mountains (Trentino, Friuli) shyness and extreme discretion are very widespread and unsociable attitudes are so more often accepted as something normal. But also here, amongst young people it is quite always viewed as strange and/or problematic, I think this is also due to the influence of the media and the models with high standards of sociability that they purport.

Edit: as to London... well I don't know, it seems to me that is more accepted because is a big city extremely diverse... I think that I'm more frowned at because I talk a bad English, than because I'm shy or socially awkward :D
But even here it is valid the 'young thing', if you are young it seems you just MUST be lusting after having fun loudly all the time, meet a lot of people and so on.
Yet I have to say that here in the streets and around in places I see more people walking or just staying on their own, this makes me feel more confortable with this than in my country, as hanging around on your own in Italy generally appears to be somehow strange.
 
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EvilFlyingCow

Well-known member
Here in the USA, shyness is looked down upon, as extroversion is seen as a positive quality. Introversion, on the other hand, is viewed as a trait that should be overcome.
 
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