How i overcame my social anxiety

Moses199

Well-known member
I had severe conversation social anxiety and got made fun by people that i can't talk to anyone when i was a young. I didn't have any female friends. Simple friendly conversation was terrifying with men or women.

What changed everything is exposure. I used to be the biggest critic and hater of exposure and always bashed it in forums or groups. I always made the excuse i'm already doing exposure since i had to go to school and was outside alot already. What difference would more exposure do. Not until i actually tried it VERY DEEP did it put a light bulb in my head and had a big realization that i actually wasn't doing it DEEP ENOUGH and LONG ENOUGH.

I started small by doing thing like saying hi to people and small talks with cashiers. Majority of people are nice and talk back, you can tell people that don't want to speak by them having a reserved face expression. I then made a commitment to go outside for 2 hours per day to start small & short convos with strangers then build my way to longer convos. I went to places that were easy to start convos with strangers that was social acceptable and wouldn't look weird. Places such as parks, bus stops benches, bars, parties, train stations, restaurants, etc.

You have to start small then build your way up. It takes time doesn't work right away. You should see small results within 2 weeks of consistent practice within 1-3 month your conversation anxiety will be almost gone. I can now approach anyone and hold conversations very easy with strangers.

The reason why you're social anxiety isn't at the worst spectrum is because you've been doing a limited exposure your whole life by by needing to go to work, school, & hangout with family. These forced limited exposure is what's keeping your social anxiety from going crazy. If you expand these areas of limited exposure you will see more social freedom in your life.
 

lily

Well-known member
Thanks for sharing, Moses199, I'm so happy for you that you have overcome social anxiety. I, too, used to criticize exposure but I find myself kind of wrong 'cause I feel after being around those close to me I feel less or no anxiety at all so it must be true that being around other nice people for quite a while will resolve the anxiety too.
 
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