RachB
Active member
apologise if this post is long. I tried to cut out some bits to make it shorter but here I go. My name Rach and I'm 26 years old. I've have social anxiety for a very long time. My mum believes it started when was 10-12 years old. I thought it was much later but I believe she's right because I remember the memory that she's referring to. Basically it started with going out somewhere or to my friends place and because I didn't want to be there or deal with people, I cried. As I got older, and went to high school, crying turned into throwing up. And going anywhere, excursions, parties, shopping centres, anywhere became a nightmare and I would say or do anything just to get out of going. I've been with my current partner for 6 years. At the start of our relationship, my anxiety was still the same but a few years later, something changed and whenever we went out, even though my anxiety was still there, it was no where near as bad as it was previously. I don't know how to explain it but in a way, it was manageable, I was able to go out and although I freaked out a little bit, I could do things and I was happy. Now fast forward a few years and now I'm back to where I was when I was in high school. Except now it's not just throwing up, it's diarrhoea too. I'd take that vomiting anyday over what I suffer now. I don't know what triggered it to come back so severe and now I just feel hopeless and trapped. Can't go to a psychiatrist, it's too hard. It's gotten to a point where I don't want to go anywhere other than where I feel safe.
So here I am, glad I've finally found a place where people understand me and I can relate to people. Hopefully I'll make some friends and it'll be nice to exchange experiences and everything else.
So here I am, glad I've finally found a place where people understand me and I can relate to people. Hopefully I'll make some friends and it'll be nice to exchange experiences and everything else.
