Hi everyone. I've lurked here for a while and finally decided to post. I have to say thank you to everyone: I've always had problems, but never really understood what they were until I started reading about others with similar issues on these forums.
So about myself... I'm 25, male, living in NYC. I've always been pretty shy and introverted. I had a few friends in high school, but none in college, aside from a few guys who I worked on my senior project with. However, not having a ton of friends has never really bothered me, probably because I’m close with my sister and we do lots of stuff together. She’s more social than me, so hanging out with her has helped me a lot.
I’ve had anxiety when it comes to a lot of things, but I’ve worked on a lot of it. I’m a lot more comfortable than I was when it comes to meeting people, carrying on a conversation, eating in public, ordering at a bar, etc. I’ve always been somewhat okay with public speaking (I know, it’s weird… I think it’s something about being in control of the people I'm talking to). However, talking on the phone terrifies me. I have to work up a ton of courage to make, take, or return a call.
My living arrangements (still with parents) are less than ideal right now, but I’m working on that as well as getting my career (software developer) in gear.
The most frustrating aspect of my life is probably my love life - in that it has and always has been non-existent. I’ve never had any real intimacy: never dated, never kissed someone, never had any sort of sex. I’m beyond frustrated and nervous about what a girl would think of me being so inexperienced. I've never had the nerves to approach a girl, but I’ve tried online dating. I’ve sent tons of messages, but almost never get any replies, even from girls I have a lot in common with. The few replies I do get never turn into anything, just small talk. I really don't know what to do anymore. I'm kinda skinny, but I never thought I was ugly or anything, but now I'm really starting to wonder how the opposite sex views me... maybe there is something off about me... Anyways, if anyone has any advice for me, I'm all ears.
Thanks for reading
So about myself... I'm 25, male, living in NYC. I've always been pretty shy and introverted. I had a few friends in high school, but none in college, aside from a few guys who I worked on my senior project with. However, not having a ton of friends has never really bothered me, probably because I’m close with my sister and we do lots of stuff together. She’s more social than me, so hanging out with her has helped me a lot.
I’ve had anxiety when it comes to a lot of things, but I’ve worked on a lot of it. I’m a lot more comfortable than I was when it comes to meeting people, carrying on a conversation, eating in public, ordering at a bar, etc. I’ve always been somewhat okay with public speaking (I know, it’s weird… I think it’s something about being in control of the people I'm talking to). However, talking on the phone terrifies me. I have to work up a ton of courage to make, take, or return a call.
My living arrangements (still with parents) are less than ideal right now, but I’m working on that as well as getting my career (software developer) in gear.
The most frustrating aspect of my life is probably my love life - in that it has and always has been non-existent. I’ve never had any real intimacy: never dated, never kissed someone, never had any sort of sex. I’m beyond frustrated and nervous about what a girl would think of me being so inexperienced. I've never had the nerves to approach a girl, but I’ve tried online dating. I’ve sent tons of messages, but almost never get any replies, even from girls I have a lot in common with. The few replies I do get never turn into anything, just small talk. I really don't know what to do anymore. I'm kinda skinny, but I never thought I was ugly or anything, but now I'm really starting to wonder how the opposite sex views me... maybe there is something off about me... Anyways, if anyone has any advice for me, I'm all ears.
Thanks for reading
