Zoya Dulzura
Active member
People seem to be taking all different sorts of routes with their introductions, so I guess I shouldn’t stress too much about the format. Anyways, I’m a grad student who has felt anxiety in social situations my whole life. I’ve always had trouble making friends, and when I have made friends, I have usually felt very distant from them, which leads to my avoiding spending time with them out of fear of rejection. I feel that this social isolation has contributed to what makes me a bit “different” from others (although I doubt that it’s the only factor). During high school I felt so afraid to talk to other people that I would often just sit there, paralyzed; this, in effect, would deter people from talking to me, which I didn’t really understand then. I spend way too much energy trying to appear “normal” in public and to act “normal” during social interaction, which I feel like detracts from my ability to fully get to know other people and to understand them and what they say. The anxiety I feel wears me out so much that after a lengthy day of being forced to talk to people in my workplace makes me come home and crash. My whole life I’ve felt ashamed of my anxiety, which has made me go through bouts of extreme sadness. Those bouts are really rare nowadays, but I do still feel frustrated with my seeming inability to break free from my shyness and “difference” and to just do what everyone else does.
K, thanks for taking the time to read my life story in a nutshell.
I’m excited about this site because from what I’ve seen, the people here seem to be so open and nonjudgmental, and many of whose self-revelations I feel a connection to. I’m looking forward to meeting you!
K, thanks for taking the time to read my life story in a nutshell.
I’m excited about this site because from what I’ve seen, the people here seem to be so open and nonjudgmental, and many of whose self-revelations I feel a connection to. I’m looking forward to meeting you!
