frustration....

[Falkor]

Hello,

I´m frustrated, really much, I want to do things good, and everything is just messed up, I really want to have my life on track. Want to study and have a job, But at the same time I know that´s my biggest fears. And My life is just worse, I´m self destructive, hating myself and Can´t even face the mirror because I know I feel worthless. And It´s getting worse and worse, I have an ambition, I want to become a singer, study computer science and I want to do more in life, suport the people who supported me, give back everything they´ve done for me. But I can´t. I´m just misery, I´m frustrated of life. I´m sick of every day of life. I can´t feel good, I pretty much do not even take care of myself, I´m not taking advantage of all the things I want to do. I´m wishing for a miracle happening to me, to feel the beauty of life again. But I´m frustrated each day, everyday I feel like I wanna die, Because, I really want to live ... But I´m not living. I´m just standing still, Throwing away each chance, I look at all the people crossing by on the street, and i´m just sitting here staring out of the window feeling the sad agoraphobic hermit.
Is this everything I can do? I know I can do more, but not with these damn fears, these fears rule my life... ::

I'm sorry for all the topics i've been posting, it sounds so ridiculus
But I don't know.. What to do.. It's just .. I can't do anything to change myself and my whole life

 

[Lionheart]

I have the same problems at the moment.I have to write a application for employment today and i dont even know what im going to write there.I dont know what im good at and I dont know what i want.Tomorrow my job coach in school want have the application for employment.Im scared as hell of job interviews but i cant avoid them all the time.It feels like there is no job for me.I wanted even avoid the meeting with the job coach.

 

[Feathers]

Saskia, sorry to hear you've been going through rough times..

It's probably just this stupid November weather!!

I sometimes wonder if there's anything I could really do for money too.. I've had jobs and some of them were okay, some didn't go so well.. You can survive anything for 3 months though, so just give it a try and maybe volunteer or do part-time work at first!!

Maybe you won't find what you like and can do well right away, it's okay to look at different things and experiment!!

Don't think you have to 'get it right' in the 1st try!!
Many people tried a few jobs before they found something they really liked doing and were good at it!!

Also, new jobs keep developing every day.. even some companies or organisations nowadays hire 'internet communication specialists' and I think you could be very good for that!

Lionheart, I can understand your frustration too.. You're lucky to even have a job coach!!
Usually, look at the ad (and/or similar ads) and see what they would like, and then think if you have even some of the qualities they want.. There are lots of tips how to write CVs and stuff online or in books like 'What Color Is Your Parachute' - I highly recommend it!!

 

[Alistair]

Heya,

Yeah, I would suggest what Feathers has suggested, look for something part time (Or a volunteer job), until you get use to it, plus you don't want to do a full time job if you ended up going to college. It makes it harder on you, and completing your school work, IMO. Or you can find something you like to do, and see if you can sell it on the side as another idea.

G'Luck!