I just joined this website a few days ago, I feel it will help me know more about shy people,etc. Now i am not sure if my crush is just shy or has avoidant in him? which i hope not. So i came here to get some help.I know my crush for several years now but we never spoke to each other before only "Hi" and "how are you" and "bye". I know its better than nothing. He is bestfriends with my brother and cousin also is a neighbor to my cousin. so pretty much they grew up together. The years that i know him he is a very quiet guy. Even before i had a crush on him he was always quiet. The only thing that i know about his past which i heard from my aunt is that his mom told her that "my crushes" dad and the mom had a divorce when crush was 2 yr old baby and his bro was 1. The mom has been married 3x so far. So not sure if hes really quiet and kind of seems scared to approach women because his moms marriages never lasted forever.The mom is currently married and they all live together with the step dad. theyve been together for like 7 yrs now. The mom raised him and the brother. The brother is married. i feel my crush is so different than his brother, more quiet and afraid 
.
So anyways, last year on my bday we all went out for lunch to eat. His friend, a guy i know asked me infront of him if i only like younger guys? and i said i just had young guys around me but dont mind older guys. Well my crush is 4 yrs older than me. So i found it weird why is he asking me this question and not before?. so many years we know each other. Then few months later the same friend suggested to my aunt how me and my crush would be good together, how we should date,etc.:blushing: lol.
this was so surprising and random, and never thought they would say that. So to me it was telling me maybe my crush spoke to his friends about me. Heres where it gets confusing, my aunt gave him my number and she pressured him to text me lol i told her not too. the paper just said my name, number, and smile. He never text me or called me. Then 2 weeks after he got my number i decided to text him first incase hes extremely shy so i can make it abit easier on him. Trust me, it was so hard for me to text him. I usually let the guy do it if hes interested. I dont mean to pressure him. I am also very shy when it comes to him.
So i text him, and the text said "hey this is .... how are you?my family gave me your number so i decided to text you lol". he fully ignored me. i was so completely hurt and never thought he would do that. I even cried that night so much. I was more surprised because my family know him. So i find him so rude to do that. Not even a simple hi. How can someone be shy through a text? i dont know. To me its not interested. This was in june so 3 mths ago. Never again did i text him again. If he wanted too he would. To me it seemed i was getting mixed messages. After that we saw each other few times and i had to be the one to go up to him and say hi how are you?. he never initiates anything its so frustrating. i know you cant force anyone. My cousin was very suspicious to me because he keeps making jokes about me and him. Like he showed me a pic on computer of my crush and said heres your boyfriend and i said i wish. Then at my house in july my cousin told me to say hi to my crush so i did and he said "dont be afraid to touch his hand as in shake his hand" lol. My crush smiled as well and said hi good,etc. Then i heard a girl say to him so "whats happening with you? i heard you got the hots for her?". this is the girlfriend of the other that suggested to my aunt for us to date.
Then at other parties, he would sit behind me and he atleast would turn his head 10x to look at me lol. I was wearing a nice dress too haha. At the end of that party he looked at me and smiled. Then just now last week was my cousins bday and we were all there. I was there before him and he was working all day but i stayed longer just to see him. He came late around 9:50pm. i left around 11:30pm. I was so hurt again because everyone at the party said hi to me and had convos but he never did:crying:. he just avoided me and other "taken" girls there. The girls had to say hi to him first. He said hi to his buddies. He probably thought i would keep talking to him first but i got so upset i couldnt do it anymore even though i wish i did talk to him. So he was talking to his friends here and there and i was so quit around him lol. I was angry, hurt, shy you name it. I never approached him that day to say hi. I was kind of hard to get. At the end he finally heard i spoke. I said my cousin to please take me home now. I left and he just looked at me smiled, scratched his head so i dont know. I also avoided him.
What do you guys think? is he interested or not? do you think he needs more time to open up incase hes shy or avoidant?. He hasnt had a girlfriend in a very long time. many years. I hardly date as well myself. Its just im suspicious of his best friends and the way he kept looking at me and smiling. I wish i can help him if hes going through something. His mom told my aunt he gets upset and she doesnt know why.
thanks for hearing me out!
.So anyways, last year on my bday we all went out for lunch to eat. His friend, a guy i know asked me infront of him if i only like younger guys? and i said i just had young guys around me but dont mind older guys. Well my crush is 4 yrs older than me. So i found it weird why is he asking me this question and not before?. so many years we know each other. Then few months later the same friend suggested to my aunt how me and my crush would be good together, how we should date,etc.:blushing: lol.
this was so surprising and random, and never thought they would say that. So to me it was telling me maybe my crush spoke to his friends about me. Heres where it gets confusing, my aunt gave him my number and she pressured him to text me lol i told her not too. the paper just said my name, number, and smile. He never text me or called me
. Then 2 weeks after he got my number i decided to text him first incase hes extremely shy so i can make it abit easier on him. Trust me, it was so hard for me to text him. I usually let the guy do it if hes interested. I dont mean to pressure him. I am also very shy when it comes to him. So i text him, and the text said "hey this is .... how are you?my family gave me your number so i decided to text you lol". he fully ignored me
. i was so completely hurt and never thought he would do that. I even cried that night so much. I was more surprised because my family know him. So i find him so rude to do that. Not even a simple hi. How can someone be shy through a text? i dont know. To me its not interested. This was in june so 3 mths ago. Never again did i text him again. If he wanted too he would. To me it seemed i was getting mixed messages. After that we saw each other few times and i had to be the one to go up to him and say hi how are you?. he never initiates anything its so frustrating. i know you cant force anyone. My cousin was very suspicious to me because he keeps making jokes about me and him. Like he showed me a pic on computer of my crush and said heres your boyfriend and i said i wish. Then at my house in july my cousin told me to say hi to my crush so i did and he said "dont be afraid to touch his hand as in shake his hand" lol. My crush smiled as well and said hi good,etc. Then i heard a girl say to him so "whats happening with you? i heard you got the hots for her?". this is the girlfriend of the other that suggested to my aunt for us to date.Then at other parties, he would sit behind me and he atleast would turn his head 10x to look at me lol. I was wearing a nice dress too haha. At the end of that party he looked at me and smiled. Then just now last week was my cousins bday and we were all there. I was there before him and he was working all day but i stayed longer just to see him
. He came late around 9:50pm. i left around 11:30pm. I was so hurt again because everyone at the party said hi to me and had convos but he never did:crying:. he just avoided me and other "taken" girls there. The girls had to say hi to him first. He said hi to his buddies. He probably thought i would keep talking to him first but i got so upset i couldnt do it anymore even though i wish i did talk to him. So he was talking to his friends here and there and i was so quit around him lol. I was angry, hurt, shy you name it. I never approached him that day to say hi. I was kind of hard to get. At the end he finally heard i spoke. I said my cousin to please take me home now. I left and he just looked at me smiled, scratched his head so i dont know. I also avoided him. What do you guys think? is he interested or not? do you think he needs more time to open up incase hes shy or avoidant?. He hasnt had a girlfriend in a very long time. many years. I hardly date as well myself. Its just im suspicious of his best friends and the way he kept looking at me and smiling. I wish i can help him if hes going through something. His mom told my aunt he gets upset and she doesnt know why.
thanks for hearing me out!
